Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

Chat

Join the discussion and chat with other Mumsnetters about everyday life, relationships and parenting.

See all MNHQ comments on this thread

Flip

1 2 3 4 5 6 ··· 11 12

Original poster

Lodger has a ONS in his room

289 replies

EachandEveryone · 31/01/2021 06:21

And normally it wouldn’t bother me but he’s already bubbled with his TA at work. I knew something was a miss when I got up at 530 for work and one of the stray cats from out side was asleep on my kitchen chair! Normally he’s so good he lets me know if someone’s staying and he hasn’t had anyone over since this lockdown. Should I say anything I can hear them having a good time or should I just turn the radio up and get ready for work?😃

OP posts:

Thread gallery

boysonthesofa · 31/01/2021 08:26

@PurpleWh1teGreen

Wait, I’ve got it.

The lodger has the office for National statistics in his room (all of them) for a good time.

He is also seeing the whole of the Territorial Army, though presumably that can only be part time though.

The black cat is actually a red herring.

Taps nose.

😝😝😝😝😝😝

butterpuffed · 31/01/2021 08:26

@Damnloginpopup

Fuck me! A cat in the kitchen means a prostitute in the bedroom?

I never, ever cease to be amazed by you lot.

I had a stray cat come in last week using the catflap. I quickly raced up to the bedroom to see what was going on in there

PurpleWh1teGreen · 31/01/2021 08:28

Shiiit we have been battling with squirrels in the loft. What the heck does that mean?

DearTeddyRobinson · 31/01/2021 08:29

A local kitten sneaked into our house the other day when I was bringing in the shopping. I immediately divorced my husband for sleeping with prostitutes. Or the Territorial Army. Anyway. Blasted cats!

donquixotedelamancha · 31/01/2021 08:34

It’s actually out of character for him.
He is lovely
He’s a lovely lovely guy this isn’t like him.

OP you should have made a move sooner.

You could try telling him you don't want stray pussies in the house but you understand he has needs, so perhaps there is another solution.

Jeremyironseverything · 31/01/2021 08:35

What sort of weird sexual practice is this cat in the kitchen, position?

Original poster

EachandEveryone · 31/01/2021 08:36

Maybe the ons brought the cat with her as a distraction? Here is the offender and his mate who wasn’t in the kitchen but keeping an eye out in the hall

OP posts:

Skipsurvey · 31/01/2021 08:37

He has perhaps met someone online op

RhubarbBikini · 31/01/2021 08:37

I'm wondering if op's lodger is DD's teacher who had to self-isolate for 2 weeks in November after "car sharing" with another member of staff who tested positive.

It's only just dawned on me that "car sharing" was probably just a euphemism for a meeting between the Office for National Statistics with the Territorial Army

Violetroselily · 31/01/2021 08:38

WhatWouldZenoDo · 31/01/2021 08:38

The cat inside just alerted OP to the fact that something was different.
She didn't conclude from the cat that he had a ONS

@EachandEveryone
later on, I'd just say, not sure what was going on earlier but even if there weren't a pandemic, a room in a house is not good for a man's sex life i'm sure but I don't want to wonder who is in my house.

marthastew · 31/01/2021 08:41

Do we need a diagram of cats/hallways/kitchen/bedroom etc to get to the bottom of this?

mumsiedarlingrevolta · 31/01/2021 08:42

I also thought Office of National Statistics...

Maybe they are "compiling" some data

cricketmum84 · 31/01/2021 08:42

The black and white one looks well shifty! I've got my money on him being the pimp.

donquixotedelamancha · 31/01/2021 08:43

I'd just say, not sure what was going on earlier

I'd be careful, if he's a Science teacher then he's answered that question many times and may just launch into the explanation. He probably has a PowerPoint prepared.

JayAlfredPrufrock · 31/01/2021 08:43

Are they both strays? They are very pretty.

Labobo · 31/01/2021 08:43

@Damnloginpopup

Fuck me! A cat in the kitchen means a prostitute in the bedroom?

I never, ever cease to be amazed by you lot.

I know. Hours of entertainment. Better than Netflix these days.

Frownette · 31/01/2021 08:45

Each just have a talk to him when you're both in. Is he usually good about wiping down surfaces etc?

I thought you had a female lodger, was that very short term?

donquixotedelamancha · 31/01/2021 08:45

Are they both strays? They are very pretty.

She's a stray, he's the lodger, how do you know what they look like?

Labobo · 31/01/2021 08:46

@DearTeddyRobinson

Original poster

EachandEveryone · 31/01/2021 08:46

At least it was t a rat in the kitchen

OP posts:

Labobo · 31/01/2021 08:46

@PurpleWh1teGreen

Shiiit we have been battling with squirrels in the loft. What the heck does that mean?

MargotLovedTom1 · 31/01/2021 08:47

Hmm...your b&w cat has a very sheepish expression on his face indicating those two have also been up to something naughty. Are they in a support bubble with each other? If not OP your flat is a moral cesspit and I despair!

Lalliella · 31/01/2021 08:47

Your cats are gorgeous OP.

And how can your lodger bubble with someone when he’s on a household with you? That stops you bubbling with anyone. You need to have serious words with him.

PanamaPattie · 31/01/2021 08:47

What am I reading?

Flip

1 2 3 4 5 6 ··· 11 12