Stupid things you have done

[tapestrymarlon]

I'm sure there are other threads like this, but I am starting my own, because today this happened:

I was making vegetable soup in my new Vitamix, and I heard something bouncing around inside, but assumed it was the fibrous broccoli (I haven't had a high powered blender before, so didn't know what was normal).

However, at the end of 6 minutes and 30 seconds (it cooks the soup as well as blending it), I discovered that I had made teaspoon soup.

The jugs are £140...

I was trying to heat up some mashed potatoes for my baby when I first became a mom and moved out. I put his plastic baby bowl in the oven and melted it! No idea why i thought it was a good idea to oven cook plastic... I even checked if it was microwave proof before putting it in the microwave the day before...

Had a plastic sieve ( thankfully clean ) in my hand when the phone rang. Picked up the drive to answer it 🙊

• sieve ( FFS auto correct)

Im currently sat on my sofa with a broken finger

I must be the only person ever who can break a finger by sitting on it

My kids think it’s the best laugh they’ve ever had

Reversing my car late at night. the parking sensors are going off, I stupidly ignore them and reverse right into a wall, felt mortified explaining how stupid I had been to my husband...

Drained my pasta into a plastic sieve then put the sieve back on the ceramic hob which was still very hot. Queue a messy plastic pasta melted combo.

I stood on a plastic washing basket to reach shower head - foot went right through - I could get it out - it was like a man trap 😡 still have scars - my niece did exactly the same thing - must be the 🧬 dna 😡

First time I was left home alone (maybe late teens) and proudly did 2 loads of wash. Hung them all out to realise I hadnt added any detergant at all.

@MiddleClassMother

Reversing my car late at night. the parking sensors are going off, I stupidly ignore them and reverse right into a wall, felt mortified explaining how stupid I had been to my husband...

I've done similar, and reversed into my wall, car get stuck, couldn't drive it out, wall was damaged. I had no explanation for the RAC man. This was all on my own drive

Trying to get out of a big washing up after our Christmas Meal ....I bought some lovely red disposable plates for us to use instead of my normal Christmas ones.....we were all ready to plate our own food and of course we were starving. DD who was first in line discovered that the hot food was melting her Styrofoam red plate! ... out came my every day dishes as my holiday ones were neatly packed away. Who knew disposable plates were only for cold foods🙄

@SpnBaby1967 I did similar, except with a very expensive kitchen aid blender...

Made a lovely French onion soup. Picked up the colander, wandered over to the sink and strained it. Keeping the winey/beefy onions.

The next time I was cooking it, my wife grabbed both colanders and ran out of the kitchen laughing

So many! And mostly to the same poor finger.
Was making millionaire shortbread and attempted to scrape the caramel off the wooden spoon using my finger - got the most hideous blister.

Once caught the same finger on the metal corner of a lever arch file. The embarrassing part of that story was that the tiny cut it caused made me pass out. At work. In front of half a dozen colleagues.

And finally managed to shut the same finger in the boot of my car. Didn’t realise until I tried to walk away and realised I couldn’t. Even now, 20 years on, my fingernail doesn’t grow straight!

@SpnBaby1967

Drained my pasta into a plastic sieve then put the sieve back on the ceramic hob which was still very hot. Queue a messy plastic pasta melted combo.

I have hob-related ones too:

I thought I smelled burning, so I leaned over to try to smell if it was coming from the back hob ring, with my weight on my hands on the front hob ring, which was actually the one which was on...had nice clear ring marks on my hands for a while.

Also I left a recipe book on a hob ring and turned it on once; I still have it, but the back cover and last few pages are somewhat charred.

Tripped over a table and broke my foot. That table had been in the same place for 15 years.

@Elouera

First time I was left home alone (maybe late teens) and proudly did 2 loads of wash. Hung them all out to realise I hadnt added any detergant at all.

Errr

One does not have to be a teen to do that.
I take that one and raise you a removal of finished wash from the machine and starting to hang it on the clothes dryer then realised it had not even been through the cycle at all. I forgot to switch it on before going shopping.

I called the AA out because the car wouldn’t start. I’d had a complete mental block that you had to depress the clutch before pressing the start button (I’d only driven it the day before)

Prepped all the dinner ingredients and placed them on a plastic tray on the hob next to the ring I was using...turned on the ring under the tray rather than the saucepan.

Absentmindedly inserted my finger into a pencil sharpener to see if it would sharpen my nail (honestly that’s what went through my brain) it did, it also removed the top third of my nail.

And this is just recent stupidity

I tried to pick up a boiling hot lantern and now I'm 100% certain I don't have finger prints (if you know me this is outing and, yes, it was in Newquay watching someone try and do a headstand) - you KNOW who you are!!!! Lol

I tried to break open a chocolate orange (before they downsized them) on my knee.

Not my finest hour. And it didn’t work.

Accidently poured mouthwash into my running bath instead of bubble bath. The whole bathroom reeked of peppermint.

All of these are brilliant fails to read, thanks for the entertainment! Here’s mine...
While DIYing I placed a bucket of water on the carpet to wipe down the walls, pretty convinced that I’d knock it over later. Which I did. Then I placed the Henry Hoover on top of the wet patch, which absorbed some of the water, and blew up my vacuum cleaner. A very expensive day!

Also have a washing one... I had a washer/dryer, never used the dryer and didn't know how to use it. Accidentally must have changed the setting to dryer and put my dirty washing in.... Needless to say I was confused as to how my washing came out hot but smellier than it was when it started!

Another particularly bad day was when I accidentally put soap instead of toothpaste on my toothbrush. All I could taste was soap for hours!

I’ve spent hours making delicious chicken stock on the hob before straining it into a colander...straight down the drain. I’ve actually done that twice.

I recently spent nearly an hour cooking dinner before realising the oven wasn’t on.

Yesterday I was looking for my phone, a bit panicky. While on the phone to my sister.

Honestly I worry about myself sometimes.

Similar car story. Got in small old car and reversed. Swung it to the right to get out the drive forgetting that shiny new 4x4 was parked alongside (how I didn't see it 🤷🏻‍♀️)
Needless to say huge scrapes dents in new car and barely a scuff on old one.

Also kicked dining table and it hurt so much I thought my toe was broken. It eased off so wasn't. Next night kicked table in exactly the same place on my other foot and broke 2 toes.
Why I can't wear slippers I don't know!