Would you go to Aus and leave your kids for 3 weeks?

[Flyornofly]

Hi - have NCed as feel guilty even thinking about this.

I am originally from Australia, married to an Englishman and have lived here for 20 odd years. 2 kids, daughter 4 and at nursery, son 2 at home right now. My family are all in Australia, my dad is 80 & mum 78, & I have a sister who is having a baby in may.

I haven’t seen my family for coming up to 2 years, I was meant to go in March 2020 when the lockdown happened. I now have a window where I could potentially fly and do the quarantines on either side (am a contractor and between projects). However, I am hesitating about bringing my kids as it will be 2 weeks cooped up in a hotel room and then only 2ish weeks with family before having to fly back. DH can’t travel with us as has to work.

Was thinking as an alternative to leave kids with DH and do the quarantine by myself, then spend just a week with my parents and come back. So would be away for 3ish weeks. I can get on a flight so no probs there.

Would you do it? I feel awful about even thinking about being away from them for that long. But am worried the Australian borders will remain shut for another year or more, and I won’t have the ability to take 3-4 weeks off once this gap between jobs finishes. And my dad, in particular, isn’t getting any younger.

I can’t figure out whether I’m being utterly ridiculous to even contemplate this or I should just GO and the kids will survive.

Who would look after the two year old if your h is working? As you say he can’t go I’m guessing he still has to work

Have you looked into whether there are flights available for this kind of visit OP? AFAIK there are Aussies who are still stuck abroad and haven't been able to get home for almost a year, due to the lack of available flights/quarantine facilities.

But no, I wouldn't leave two such young DC for weeks on end just to visit my DSis' new baby. Your DC should come first.

I can get a confirmed flight, yes. It will cost thousands, yes. Money I have and am willing to spend. I wouldn’t be posting on here if I hadn’t investigated flights!

Getting stuck there is a good point but I was told that it was relatively easy to get out as lots of seats, just hard to get in!

Would be flying into same city as quarantine (melbourne).

Where is the waiting list? Ie where DJ you register. His long is it

Do you

Just because Adam Hills can do it, doesn’t mean ordinary people can. Australia has just halved its quarantine intake and Emirates has stopped flying here. Business class travellers are prioritised and people are bumped off flights at the last minute. Australia’s internal borders are constantly changing if there is even the tiniest number of cases so you would need to be flying into the same state you want to visit, limiting your flight options even more.

These are not normal times and I wouldn’t leave my children behind when there is a possibility of my return being delayed. I’d wait and visit as a family when the borders are open again.

(And we have a nanny so childcare is fine)

I don’t know how you time entry if there’s a list but other stuff sounds more doable

I couldn’t bear two weeks in a room without being in that sunshine just for one week but if you can handle that part it sounds like getting entry is the barrier

You might be able to book a flight but you might not actually go. There are a lot of Australian nationals wanting to return home but because there is a limit to the numbers allowed to land in Australia they are finding that they are being bumped from flights. Some have been waiting for months. Even if your flight is confirmed you might be bumped because someone else's need is greater. My niece died last week in Australia and my SIL was allowed to fly out to see her before they turned the life support machine off, presumably somebody else was bumped off the entry allowance so that she was able to go.

Leaving the kids wouldn't concern me, and I'm also in the same situation as you re distance from family.
My main concern would be getting stuck there for much longer than anticipated, which would give me pause.

I haven't seen my family in 2 years either and currently live on an island with no community cases of Covid. But of course can't go back to the Uk to see family because of the situation there.

If my parents were ill or elderly though, I probably wouldn't think twice.

Yes. I say this as someone whose mum did exactly the same when I was young. All her family are in Australia with the exception of my dad and I.

It's a LONG flight to do with small children at the best of times, let alone when they'll have to be stuck in quarantine for a fortnight on the other side of things.

If you can get flights, and you have childcare sorted, then absolutely go. You would regret it so much if you didn't and missed your last chance to see your parents.

Go.

I wouldn't go to spend 2 weeks quarantining. But as soon as restrictions are lifted I'd leave the kids for a month with dh and spend a month with family.

Are you in the UK? Non-essential travel abroad is banned, so it's not possible for that reason alone.

I wouldn't do it - there's a reasonable chance of getting stranded there, and your 2-year-old is too young to understand where you've gone and why, they will be heartbroken (as will you most likely - it'll be miserable stuck in a hotel for 2 weeks missing your DC).

Sorry OP, I'd wait till the end of the year.

@FraterculaArctica

Are you in the UK? Non-essential travel abroad is banned, so it's not possible for that reason alone.

Good point!

@HavelockVetinari that’s what I’m concerned about, my 2 year old

The problem is that I will eat my hat if the 2 week restriction has been lifted by the end of the year, Australia is talking about keeping border restrictions until 2023!! And I won’t be able to take 3-4weeks off to get through quarantine then.

If you are an Australian citizen then you can go. I know ppl who flew to New Zealand before Christmas. If they can get to New Zealand then you can get oz

@Remaker

Just because Adam Hills can do it, doesn’t mean ordinary people can. Australia has just halved its quarantine intake and Emirates has stopped flying here. Business class travellers are prioritised and people are bumped off flights at the last minute. Australia’s internal borders are constantly changing if there is even the tiniest number of cases so you would need to be flying into the same state you want to visit, limiting your flight options even more.

These are not normal times and I wouldn’t leave my children behind when there is a possibility of my return being delayed. I’d wait and visit as a family when the borders are open again.

How did Adam hills do it so easily? Was it because he was going to Melbourne and tennis aside that is normally quieter / lower demand than Sydney? He seemed to pop back mid Dec to Melbourne and back again to U.K. last week. But you also hear of Australians unable to return back to Australia since April?

I think you should tweet Adam and find out what he did? Might be worth a shot?
Be interesting to see if he returns to Australia at the end of last leg whenever that is.
His explanation for not needing to quarantine in the U.K. when he returned here was that you don’t need to wipe your feet before stepping in a muddy puddle which I thought was pretty rude!

If you can get a flight then go OP. It’s a horrendous situation and in my view seeing elderly parents is pretty essential.

I am in the same situation as you. I am hoping to get to Oz this year no matter what.

Yes I am an Australian citizen, obv. You didn’t need to quarantine in the U.K. on the return prior to a couple of days ago. Tbf there is basically no covid in Oz so why would you?!

Argh, I am really in two minds. I think I should go, I don’t want to leave my kids, then I think I should just take them with me, then I think of being stuck in a hotel room with a 2&4yo for two weeks straight....aaargh!

Similar situation to you, similar age kids, similar age parents, but my family are in NZ. No I wouldn't go. Too many variables at the moment, you could get stuck there, what happens (unlikely but possible) if your DH or one of your kids becomes seriously ill while you're away- you can't get back to them quickly etc. I wouldn't go anywhere without my kids right now.

With their father? Yes. With another relative? No.

My concern would be what if you can't get home?

There is talk now of hotel quarantine being put in place for arrivals into the Uk for 2 weeks so you will be in quarantine for 4 weeks and won't see your kids for 5-6 weeks

I get it op, my family are in the Far East so I'm desperate to see them too

I would go and take the kids - you don't know what could happen and risk being separated for who knows how long.

Last year I was living abroad and was planning to come back to the UK for work. I ummed and ahhhed for ages. In the end DH and I decided we (DH, DS and I) would all flu to the UK - whatever happens we stick together. As it got closer to the flight, the cases in the UK soared and I got very nervous, UK went into lockdown, then our home country went into lockdown. Luckily my employer cancelled all trips abroad the day before we left. Other families were separated for months. With the become on its way, everything is looking more optimistic. But I'd still take 2 weeks in quarantine with kids than the unknown.

You might not care, but how are you justifying it not being a breach of lockdown rules?