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Original poster

Is anyone else just right on the fking edge?

198 replies

asparagusspears · 22/12/2020 15:03

I can't be the only one on the actual verge of losing my shit altogether right now?

Why is everyone else so calm?

This stupid woman in Scotland is closing everything down again, putting my job at risk again, we all know for a lot longer than what they have said it will be, leaving kids trapped indoors with nothing to do in the darkest, wettest, coldest months of the year, money is already tight and my employer's patience is already thin on the ground, I am already working throughout the 'holiday' period, there have been no holidays this year, no breaks for any of us, I have two disabled parents who cannot do anything without me helping them to achieve it (example - my dad's television "isn't working" ie he's pressed the wrong button, so I need to go over there and fix it for him) my beloved dog is terminally ill, my OH is absolutely on my last nerve and all he cares about is our friends backing out of the new years party that had been planned, now he's pissed off he'll be stuck in with me, my MIL is an absolute arse from hell, and I have just had e-fucking-nough and it feels like I am the only one who is pissed off and angry and tearful?

Why is everyone else so shruggy and "oh well" and it's just what we have to do, and well that's 2020 for you and at least this, and at least that...?

Why is no one else ready to punch the next person they see???

OP posts:
TooManyPlatesInMotion · 22/12/2020 16:39

@TheoriginalLEM

Yeah im pretty fed up

Ive got covid, so does DP and my mum just died. Ive had to stop my dd1 coming for Christmas, i cant even get some paracetamol without putting on one of mt friends to collect it.

I'd quite happily forgo the wholE of Fucking Christmas if it meant i get my mum back.

Cant even believe people were contemplating fuckibg new year parties

I am so sorry you've lost your Mum. Flowers
coronafiona · 22/12/2020 16:40

I feel like there is a massive wave of anxiety I'm keeping behind a closed door, I'm not sure how long I can hold it shut for.

Whyistheteacold · 22/12/2020 16:40

I am not in Scotland but completely agree with you op. Like JellyBabies I have repeatedly typed out long angry responses to things and then just deleted it. I have no advice or anything 🌼

fussychica · 22/12/2020 16:42

I've been fine until Saturday when the announcement meant I can't see DS who is in Tier 4 for who knows how long. I'm not bothered about the Christmas side I'd just like to see him. It will be hard though when I see all my neighbours entertaining their non Tier 4 families on Xmas Day but what made me really annoyed was finding out some of these people are seeing another set of relatives on Boxing Day regardless of the rules!
However, when I read some of the awful consequences of the virus for so many on here I count my blessings and keep my fingers crossed that we just stay healthy, mentally and physically. FlowersCakeGin to all those having a tough time.

TooManyPlatesInMotion · 22/12/2020 16:46

I hear you. It is shit, utterly shit. No point pretending otherwise. All we can do is just try and take it one day (or hour) at a time.

Was in an online work meeting and a colleague was banging on about how she really enjoyed aspects of it - the slower pace, no pressure to do anything as there is nothing to do. I wanted to fucking scream.

egfd2557 · 22/12/2020 16:46

Yes I'm on the edge too. Nothing to look forward to, children stuck inside and climbing the walls, nursery was closed a week ago. And so many have it much worse than I do. I guess it will get better but it seems a long time to wait. People calling it moaning - you don't know anyone else's personal circumstances so a bit of sympathy and understanding wouldn't go amiss, especially at this time of year

NorbertMeubles · 22/12/2020 16:46

If one more person tells me to go for a walk or look at the birds or learn to knit I will fucking scream.

Timeforabiscuit · 22/12/2020 16:46

I think everyone hits their limit eventually, at the moment it's DH is on a hair trigger about anything - last month I was in tears (or threat of them) for a good week. I blamed work stuff, but I think it's the constant threat of "winter is coming", close family not understanding, or not taking what you say seriously - and a good wallop of fear.

WentworthPrison · 22/12/2020 16:49

@egfd2557

Yes I'm on the edge too. Nothing to look forward to, children stuck inside and climbing the walls, nursery was closed a week ago. And so many have it much worse than I do. I guess it will get better but it seems a long time to wait. People calling it moaning - you don't know anyone else's personal circumstances so a bit of sympathy and understanding wouldn't go amiss, especially at this time of year
You don't know my circumstances either. I've just had Covid. I'm having Christmas and new year completely alone. Still no point in making myself miserable though.
megletthesecond · 22/12/2020 16:49

I'm a pessimist who suspected this year would be a shit show.
This winter was always going to be a mess, not helped by Johnson faffing around I might add. I'm pushing through and hoping summer will be ok and then we'll be almost back to normal by Easter 2022.

longtimemarried · 22/12/2020 16:49

Los three members of my family this year, so you could say I feel a bit low.

BreadSaucery · 22/12/2020 16:50
For the times when you have faceache from trying to smile and see the best right now.
ContessaDiPulpo · 22/12/2020 16:50

I'm struggling atm. We were meant to travel overseas (legally, with tests taken and isolating beforehand and all that) to see my dad, my one remaining parent, who I haven't seen since late 2019. Had to decide to cancel the booking on Saturday night, less than 48 hours from the flight date. I am properly gutted and want the world to just fuck off. And yes I know we have everything we need and many blessings and should be grateful for them, and usually I am. But right now I am just really sad and want my dad.

dementedma · 22/12/2020 16:54

If one more person suggests " a nice walk" I swear I will punch them. It wont solve anything and its cold and dark and wet.
And if I hear " it is what it is" once more.....grrr!

WentworthPrison · 22/12/2020 16:57

@dementedma

If one more person suggests " a nice walk" I swear I will punch them. It wont solve anything and its cold and dark and wet. And if I hear " it is what it is" once more.....grrr!
Walking in all weathers has done more for my mental health than anything else ever has.
SmileyClare · 22/12/2020 17:00

Well quite. It's hardly "wallowing " to be terrified that you won't have a job soon. What an odd thing to say.

I think it's fine to have a rant and a moan.

NorbertMeubles · 22/12/2020 17:00

Why are you on this thread Wentworthprison??? I think you should go and sprinkle your sparkly rays of good cheer and sunshine elsewhere. You sound patronising to people who think this is all shit. You do realise people don't have to enjoy / like this don't you? You do understand that a zoom call with drinkie-poos sometimes doesn't quite cut the mustard? Maybe if it did, we'd not be miserable and fucked off.

WentworthPrison · 22/12/2020 17:02

@NorbertMeubles

Why are you on this thread Wentworthprison??? I think you should go and sprinkle your sparkly rays of good cheer and sunshine elsewhere. You sound patronising to people who think this is all shit. You do realise people don't have to enjoy / like this don't you? You do understand that a zoom call with drinkie-poos sometimes doesn't quite cut the mustard? Maybe if it did, we'd not be miserable and fucked off.
Nobody said it's not shit. However, you can choose to deal with it positively or not. Up to you though. I'll bow out now and take care all.
Sideorderofchips · 22/12/2020 17:07

Fuck being positive.

I've tried being positive. Everytime I think positive something else happens.

SkintHippy · 22/12/2020 17:07

Just wanted to send sympathy to all of you. I'm not in Scotland and I can't imagine how tough things are for some of you. And I am also tired of the people (and there are some) who are absolutely LOVING this, it's the most excitement they've had for years in their little lives, and they are almost gleeful at everything being cancelled/restricted etc. Now we will all be miserable, not just them!
I feel for all of you who have lost someone to Covid, or been ill yourself, please don't think I don't it's very serious for some people, and very frightening. I get it. I do.
But for the love of god, please stop with a)it is what it is, b) Zoom quizzes, Zoom parties, Zoom anything (some of us hate cameras), c) lovely walks...lovely if you live somewhere lovely or have transport to get to somewhere lovely. d) the constant shaming of anyone who dares to say they are struggling.
This is shit. It is. We are allowed to say so without being accused of 'wallowing'. It probably 'is what it is' if you have a nice centrally-heated house, with a garden to sit in, a car to drive, real life support when you feel a bit shit. But, and this is my point, not everyone has the privileges that make this kind of batshittery bearable. The mental health and financial repercussions of this are immense. And as always, it's the people who are already struggling who are hit hardest. Don't tell me I 'have to make the best of it' when I'm on Universal Credit due to a chronic health condition, and live in a fourth floor flat with no garden. Don't tell me to go for lovely walks and take up a nice middle-class hobby. Give me an adequately funded NHS and the ability to access the mental health care I need.
@asparagusspears
I am sorry to hijack your thread, you're having a shit time, you cry or tantrum or do whatever you need to do to remind yourself you're still human. Thinking of all of you who are struggling.

DownstairsMixUp · 22/12/2020 17:08

This reply has been withdrawn

This has been withdrawn by MNHQ at the poster's request.

Cam2020 · 22/12/2020 17:10

You're definitely not alone Flowers

BeautifulandWilfulandDead · 22/12/2020 17:10

Everybody I know seems totally fine and shruggy...except my WhatsApp group of 5 closest friends who are completely honest with each other. They are all climbing the walls with rage, sadness or anxiety. This leads me to believe that most people are definitely not fine and are mostly putting a brace face on it. Do step away from FB though. That's not going to help anything!

Weepingwillows12 · 22/12/2020 17:11

I am definitely not dealing with things well since the tier 4 announcement. Cry at the drop of a hat, grumpy the next minute, hiding away in corners as I cant think of another "fun activity" to keep my young kids from fighting, watching screens all day etc... I keep reminding myself others have it worse,the end is in sight etc but honestly this week I am just wallowing in self pity. I so want to just break the rules and see my family but actually I would probably end up biting their head off as so on edge!

WrongKindOfFace · 22/12/2020 17:11

@Sideorderofchips

Fuck being positive.

I've tried being positive. Everytime I think positive something else happens.

Fuck, yes.

We get a vaccine and 2021 is just around the corner. Then along comes covid 2.0 with its 70% more fucking infectiveness.

Pretty much everything is just utter wank right now.

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