Does your partner call you during his work day?

[3inthefuckingmorning]

I am a SAHM, with a baby and a 4 year old. Been on lots of walks lately with friends who are also mums at home with babies or kids at school. Nearly all of them get a phone call from there partners while they are at work, just to say hello and see how things are going. My partner doesn't do this and when I told him all my friends get calls he said it is weird.

Does your partner/ DH/DW call you?

Only if we have something specific to check in about. I can see if you work shifts etc it’d have its benefits.

To be honest I’d find it pretty rude if I was out walking with a friend and they then spent the time on the phone nattering to their DH about nothing important when they’d see them anyway in a few hours.

There’s nothing wrong in speaking throughout the day, but there’s also nothing wrong in not checking in - for example both myself and DP work at places where there are subtle career benefits from being social and walking to the shop/grabbing lunch with colleagues.

Not unless it's important. But a text maybe, most days.

Ugh yes- he gets bored when driving. I bit his head off a few weeks ago saying l am not sitting by the phone waiting for you to call. He told me lnwas rude and he wouldn't call again!! Was bliss for a few weeks til he got over his strop and now he phones again! Sigh!!

No never, but he barely gets time to go to the loo so I wouldn't expect it.

We used to text each other during the day when we could but no calls unless I needed to talk to him about a specific thing

It bugs me when I'm out with friends and their partners call them for a chat to be honest. If it was me I would just say oh I'm out with so and so at the moment I'll speak to you later

Sometimes. I find it really irritating, but then I'm usually trying to work. I find it irritating if I have a day off aswell right enough.

No, we're both busy. I wouldn't think to ring him in the middle of my working day, so why would I expect him to ring me in the middle of his? Maybe it depends on the job as some are less pressured/have more spare time at lunch, etc. Maybe they're bored and just want to talk. I don't have time to get bored at work, and I don't think dh does either.

Ugh yes- he gets bored when driving.

Mine does that too! I've also told him where to go and he takes the huff, but it doesn't last long.

Sometimes. But he’s worked from home for the last four years, so now if he wants to chat he just comes and finds me. It’s usually just to witter at me about something work related though, rather than a proper chat.

No, thankfully his job is a bit busy for that, as is mine. Break times are for getting food and fresh air. We text shopping list requirements to each other, or anything remarkable or interesting.

That was before 2020, though. Now I work from home and he is on paternity leave, so we see each other a lot more.

No, only if there was something we needed to communicate before the end of the day.
I have friends whose partners call them from work every day and it always feels like they are being checked up on. I don't like it.

Yes, mine does. He works shifts so usually calls on a day shift & texts on a night, just to see how I am / how the kids are etc.

I don’t think there is a right or wrong! When I’m working I never call him

Yes.

Whoever did school drop off calls the other to let them know DD went in happy.

Then we'll sometimes call at lunchtime.

We message a few times throughout the day too.

And we run our own business so that's only if we aren't both in the office at the same time.

Yep, he gives me a quick call on both of his breaks . Has done since we met 18 years ago.

No, I occasionally get a message about him being home late. Unless me or the baby is ill, then he will check in - but invariably by text

No, we both hate talking on the phone! He messages me when it’s quiet though

No, DH never calls/called. The few times he even ever text me were when we'd first got together in the honeymoon phase!

But when the DC were little (17 month gap) I would sometimes call him when they'd run rings round me!

Depends on the day, if it's a surgery day then no and he's not really contactable unless I want to speak to whoever is taking his calls, so only in an emergency.

Other days he will usually ring.

Sometimes yes, sometimes no.

Mine doesnt/didn’t (wfh currently)
I had a close friend I spent a lot of time with when the kids were little and her partner would always call for seemingly no particular reason. I thought it was sweet and was a bit envious of how close they seemed. Thought they were really solid. But a couple of years later they were the first to split up after the partner got together with someone else from work

Well mine WFH at the moment so occasionally I get a text from the next room if he's stuck on a three hour conference call/meeting asking "please lovely darling wife of mine, please bring me a coffee/sandwich/biscuits in I'm losing my mind in here and I'm starving!" I usually grumble by reply text, reminding him I'm not his PA and then take him a sandwich because I feel sorry for him ha ha ha! (I'm a SAHM, so not 'working' myself).

But when he worked in the office generally no, he'd only ring if he actually needed to speak to me - so to let me know that he was going to be late in, or ask if I wanted him to pop into the supermarket on the way home etc. When the children were small babies I'd get a text asking if we were ok etc sometimes.

I'd find it weird if he rang me just for a chat, and think he didn't have enough to do at work!

Depends on what he's doing. Generally no as too busy but he will call if he needs something

All the time. And when he walks home from work aswell. We have a very strong relationship and both of us have anxiety, so having those phone calls puts us both at ease ☺️

No