Fuckkkkkkkk, I told DD the naughty kids get the headteacher awards and then she went and told the other kids 😬

[Allwhiteeverythin]

School run is going to be fun today ffs

DD came out of school last Friday upset the same kid had the award for the 3rd time this term. She’s had it once since reception. I lost my temper a bit and just said “oh did they just give it to the naughty kids to make them feel better you already know how to behave” .

Which she then repeated to the other kids at school yesterday . Teacher told me after school and said she hadn’t realised this kid had had it 3 times (naughtiest kid in the class obvs).

They’re going to go home and tell their parents aren’t they?

You’re not wrong though OP Don’t worry about it. I doubt that you were the first to say it.

the proper description is challenging op for a start

There should also be different ways to incentivise and reward children who struggle, not a meaningless bit of paper that just upsets other children.

Thanks for making things harder for children like her and all the other children who needed the lift. Disgusting behaviour on your part.
this, with bells on. I also have a very quiet, anxious child, with some SENDs.
he got several headteacher awards over the years because he tried incredibly hard all the time. Yes, the output isn’t the same as what your perfect neurotypical child does effortlessly, but his life is so much harder.
Either grow a pair and address it with school if it’s genuinely unfair (muttering behind closed doors is a fairly cowardly way to do things), or help your child to work hard.

In good primaries, they rotate this so everyone gets to be Star of the week at some time, but for different things. So neat writing, behaving well, being kind, whatever.

My children's school were also very democratic about plays- everyone had a part, even if it meant that there were 6 witches rather than 1 in any given play! Those that didn't want to go on stage could choose to be in the chorus or stage hands, never anyone left out.

Every child encouraged to speak in class assembly as well, or held up their picture, or joined in. Again, no 'stars' hogging the whole thing.

I loved my children's primary for that.

You are 100% correct, I detested the use of these star of the week awards and having to console DS1 when he never seemed to get it, thank fuck DS2’s teacher is more sensible and doesn’t do this nonsense!

@LadyCatStark

Meh... it’s true though isn’t it... I wouldn’t get worked up about it. Maybe it might make teachers think. DS was the forgotten child throughout primary school. He was used to it by year 6 and not bothered about things like star of the week but I was very 🤨 when the ‘naughty’ child got star of the week the week after threatening To bring a knife to school to stab DS and his friends with... then lockdown happened and DS never got it. So a note to teachers, the quiet children might not get chance to ‘all get it in the end’.

Wow! Teachers are supposed to predict a pandemic so decide which children they don’t mind missing out?

I give it to the child who has excelled that week above their usual. There are some children who could get it every week for being quiet and always listening. I’d rather give it to them for outstanding work or helping a friend in a particularly difficult situation. I want it to actually mean something. A real personal achievement. Every child has a personal achievement each year. It will look different for every child though.

It is true though and most of the kids become aware of this as they go through the school years.

Just to clarify, I don’t give two hoots about the headteacher award. They have a daily reward chart in the classroom where they move up and down the scale for behaviour/effort/kindness.

It bears no relation to the kids who get an award at the end of the week. I was annoyed at DD going on about it again every bloody Friday

Anyway I’m off to school

Will remove earrings first

My kids have got awards without being naughty but I do agree that kids that have been naughty and then improve their behaviour are given awards, because rewarding the good behaviour works better than punishing the bad. I think over all most kids get “star of the week” at some point even those who have not been naughty.

But you're not wrong OP. DS used to get so upset. By the end of summer term, he was desperate to get it as the only time he;d had it was for not making a fuss when another child pulled his trousers off him in class! (ie tolerating bullying) So glad to see that back of that 'lovely village primary'

@Allwhiteeverythin

Just to clarify, I don’t give two hoots about the headteacher award. They have a daily reward chart in the classroom where they move up and down the scale for behaviour/effort/kindness.

It bears no relation to the kids who get an award at the end of the week. I was annoyed at DD going on about it again every bloody Friday

No, you're projecting through your child, failing a basic rule of parenting. You're judging another child based on hearsay, and you have called their child a little sod. What a lovely person.

Hint: your child isn't perfect, that's why they've not won the awards (that you claim not to care about, yet care enough to post on MN about). I just hope they don't pick up any small-mindedness from you.

Mum of the year.

PS I hope someone DOES mention it at the school gate and you have to explain yourself. See how far calling their children little sods gets you.

I was annoyed at DD going on about it again every bloody Friday ah well if you were annoyed that your otherwise happy and achieving child is such hard work . You both sound like you lack fairly basic compassion or understanding of the difficulties others have to overcome. So long as you were annoyed...such blind privilege is embarrassing to read.

Love how everyone just assumes you don't want the kids to ever get the rewards as opposed to just wishing your kid wasn't invisible occasionally..

Are you suggesting you cant have both?

@Mummatron3000

You are 100% correct, I detested the use of these star of the week awards and having to console DS1 when he never seemed to get it, thank fuck DS2’s teacher is more sensible and doesn’t do this nonsense!

Yeah, rewarding kids is bad. In my day we were beaten to sleep and WE WERE GRATEFUL FOR IT.

@Allwhiteeverythin

Anyway I’m off to school

Will remove earrings first

😂😂

Well, it does happen so you’re only telling your dd the truth.

Just because it happens sometimes though, doesn’t mean those children that deserve an award never get one. They will if they deserve it, but if it’s a weekly award and one child has had it three times this term, then something is going wrong because unless it’s a tiny class there hasn’t been enough weeks for every child to have a turn yet. The teacher should have a better system of keeping track of who’s had the award to avoid children feeling like they’re overlooked.

There are some nasty snobs on this thread! Total hypocrites.

Yeah OP, watch out for those “big scary mummas” 😭😂

It certainly happens, and sooner or later the children suss it out for themselves if a parent doesn’t bring it up earlier. In the short term it’s incredibly frustrating when your well behaved, hard working child is overlooked yet again. However in the long term the well behaved, hard working children generally go on to do well at secondary regardless of star of the week prizes at primary, but the encouragement of the star of the week might just be enough to tip the balance for the other children and get then to engage with school.

[quote SantasYumnuts]@Fifawidow well, aren’t you a delight. Bet your children are too.[/quote]
And yet it's perfectly fine to say that her children are clearly naughty, "poor little sods" etc etc...