Fuckkkkkkkk, I told DD the naughty kids get the headteacher awards and then she went and told the other kids 😬

[Allwhiteeverythin]

School run is going to be fun today ffs

DD came out of school last Friday upset the same kid had the award for the 3rd time this term. She’s had it once since reception. I lost my temper a bit and just said “oh did they just give it to the naughty kids to make them feel better you already know how to behave” .

Which she then repeated to the other kids at school yesterday . Teacher told me after school and said she hadn’t realised this kid had had it 3 times (naughtiest kid in the class obvs).

They’re going to go home and tell their parents aren’t they?

I think our teachers keep a list, they seem well distributed. DS1 gets his on a science theme event. DS2 gets his for maths (it was sweet in y2 after he got it when he excitedly realised in the supermarket that there were proces everywhere! And on the reciept! And he enthusuastically took the reciept of my weeks shop in to show and tell )

They have never earned a writer of the week between the pair of them though. That seems to circulate around the same core who have the luck not to be very dyslexic.

You could tell in family assembly when it was a kid who'd earned it by keeping their hands to themselves for a few days, or actually trying for once. I love decoding teacher euphemisms

When my DC were at primary the awards were given out each week in assembly in front of the parents. There were 2 per class so a child got the award about twice each school year.

It was a bloody nightmare because it was in the form of an actual trophy which you had to remember to bring back to school the following week so it could be awarded to the next child. I did a fair amount of chucking the kids into the playground and egging it back home to collect the wretched things over their school career

Your dd has done the rest of the class, their parents and their teacher a public service imo. It’s obviously ridiculous if the naughtiest child gets the award - emperors new clothes situation to pretend otherwise. It’s really tough for the ones that always do the right thing and aren’t recognised.

Hopefully the teacher will start to keep a checklist of who has had it and why from now on to redress the balance a little. Does the school have any other reward systems?

I shouldn't worry about it, OP. It used to irk me at primary school that there seemed to be no recognition for being consistently well-behaved and trying your best all the time. Star of the Week and that sort of thing can absolutely recognise that though if the teacher so chooses.

When l was teaching the unkind kids never ever got a head teacher award, although you would have to find some kind of opportunity to give them star of the week at some point. You might however give it to kids who were trying hard to overcome their struggles - I know I gave it twice in one term to a little boy who's mum was a violent drunk and often missed his adhd tablets as he hadnt been fed, or because he'd had to go to another family member the night before after being left at school until 5/6pm when his mum never turned up. He was bloody hard work but tried so, so hard and had a heart of gold which the other kids understood. If I knew a parent was going round telling the other kids he just got the award because he was naughty I would have been disgusted. Very very few kids are just 'naughty' - they all have their reasons whether its parents spoiling them rotten, parents neglecting their needs, SN or mental health, and sometimes the teachers don't even know never mind the rest of the class. Or some kids are 'naughty because their parents are judgy and superior and encourage their children to be the same way

It’s laughable that you begrudge a small child who’s behaviour is screaming “I’m struggling” the crutch of a bit of paper to encourage them towards better behaviour and want to put them down.

Dd got star of the week several times and still gets a fair few “awards”. She suffers from crippling anxiety after life threatening illness and is so shy she can barely cope in school. Thanks for making things harder for children like her and all the other children who needed the lift. Disgusting behaviour on your part.

Most parents already know this, unless they are deluded. Even the more astute children will have worked it out. I don't think you need to apologize. The school needs to work out a better system.

I wouldn't worry about it too much. Realistically nobody is going to really stress over a small child saying "oh but my mum said...."

I said that 100% attendance awards were silly, encouraged people to slow their kids to spread infections and were discriminating against kids with health conditions once in front of the school staff when my child was upset. They pretended not to hear, in certain they did!

They have never earned a writer of the week between the pair of them though. That seems to circulate around the same core who have the luck not to be very dyslexic.

Have you seen their writing to verify this or are you just making assumptions?

you were wrong surely?
they should be fairer in their award giving,even if its just for being Kind

Well you’re not far off the truth.

one difficult mother complained at the unfairness of how her son never got an award, actually complained to the school. he was a real pita

I would definitely try and explain to your DD that you were wrong. Or else she'll associate getting the award with being naughty, and may continue to comment on it when she and her friends get it.

What you said is true in many schools.

DD hardly ever gets reward points despite always working hard and behaving, her work is not exceptional enough to get rewarded.
DS has SEN and gets rewards points very frequently pretty much for putting his pen to paper and not walking out of lessons.

Meh... it’s true though isn’t it... I wouldn’t get worked up about it. Maybe it might make teachers think. DS was the forgotten child throughout primary school. He was used to it by year 6 and not bothered about things like star of the week but I was very 🤨 when the ‘naughty’ child got star of the week the week after threatening To bring a knife to school to stab DS and his friends with... then lockdown happened and DS never got it. So a note to teachers, the quiet children might not get chance to ‘all get it in the end’.

i hope your dd gets an award now, nay, several awards op, just to teach you a lesson

I never knew this! I’ve always felt shitty for my son because he only won it once in the last two years 😁

I wouldn't apologise , you're not wrong. My DD only got a star of the week for the first time recently and she's year 2 . The naughty kids in the class have had it numerous times, including one time where a boy kicked my DD (I was called in because of how serious it was) and that week the boy was given star of the week award .

I’m not standing up on the zoom call and screaming FIX when they announce Jonny has the award again for “effort”. These aren’t kids with alcoholic parents who need a crutch, they’re little sods with indulgent parents

Jeez have some of you got of the bed the wrong side this morning? Bit early to be starting the day off nasty, is there any need to call the OP a bitch?

It's true though. I was always well behaved at school, but never got anything for good behaviour. Those who were often naughty would win for behaving for one lesson out of many- it's not any sort of actual reward, it's just a carrot on a stick. As a child though you don't always understand that, and they seem to cause more upset than they're worth.

@Fifawidow

Fuk u OP!!! My kids get these awards all the time does that mean mine are super naughty!!

Yes, that's absolutely the logical conclusion to draw from an offhand comment by a parent.

Every child ever in the world to get a primary school award is the naughtiest child.

The fact that you even have to ask means you must think it's true.