Can I just invite you to have a laugh at my exh? You'll like this.

[WankPuffins]

Received a text this morning telling me that he's going for "full custody" of Ds as I've flouted lockdown rules for the second time that he knows of by having a visitors in the house.

He's contacting a solicitor this afternoon.

I.cannot.Stop.Laughing.

My Ds is 18 next week

Oh god, he's such a twat. I really, really hope he does speak to a solicitor this afternoon about custody of someone who will be an adult in ten days time. I'd love to be a fly on the wall for that.

I've had thirteen years of this shit since we separated. He's never let up.

(For those interested, in April he was on the phone to Ds. Ds came to ask me something and he had to wait a second while I finished my conversation. His father heard another woman's voice in the room and reported me to the police for having someone in the house. That woman was my independent midwife over for my 28 week check and blood tests).

This time, he was talking to Ds online, the door went and I shouted to Ds to get it as I was changing the baby. He told his dad he just had to open the door for someone. He went mental again, hence the text. Oh and no one came in this time, it was FIL dropping off a some pain meds for Dh, all socially distanced, he dropped them at the door and said hi to ds from the end of the drive. No rules broken either time).

what a prick op

Sadly OP there are plenty of these idiots around. My own Wank Puffin ex has even managed to find someone else to procreate with! And she seems like such a lovely, intelligent lady as well!

My SIL always said I could write a book with tales about my ex. Here is a gem for you. He once came to pick DD up (when she was a bit younger and still wanted to spend time with him). He's a scruffy sod at the best of times, but this time he had half his breakfast down his jumper. I pointed it out to him and he picked off said dried crusty bit of food and ate it!! It's moments like these which make me forever grateful that I saw sense!

😂 this gave me a giggle.

What an idiot.

Crikey op, what an arsehole he is. I bet you can't wait for him to be permanently out of your life.

Hahaha, what an arsehole!

I know a family (this was back in the 80s early 90s) who divorced after he beat the living shit out of her one time too many

He was required to send money every month and his new wife did so, in change through the post. The price of the postage was always deducted. He also never bought presents as he said the maintenance covered it.

His boys hero worshipped him until they had kids of their own and now funnily enough they have nothing to do with him.

This made me smile

Thumbs up emoji would be my reply, as it would enrage him

What a tool!

Seriously just block him now.

But I would have had to reply to the presents texts that nope the presents and card would all be signed from me and new DH - really piss him off

Following!

I can imagine the look on the solicitor's face when he says he wants custody of another adult.

I have a similar ex - although ds is 30 now so long gone from my life. He told ds that all the money he gave me in maintenance should be going directly to him as pocket money. I explained when ds was old enough that the money was towards his living costs and his dad was legally obliged to contribute. Ds asked how his living costs were £100 a week. I took a deep breath and showed him some bank statements - setting out the £22 a MONTH that I was actually getting. That stopped when ds was 13 because his dad had a baby with his new wife.

As a result of this and other stories, ds has no contact with his dad now. He won't even visit ds' house when he lived 5 minutes walk from him and has declined to attend birthday parties, graduation and ds' wedding - on the grounds that I'll be there.

😂😂😂😂

I got sent a spreadsheet to fill in with all my expenses to fill in and then he would assess them and decide if he owed me any maintenance

Sadly as a self employed professional with a good accountant I never would have got a penny anyway.

Can’t think why you split with him! What a moron he is. Maybe the solicitor will think he misheard and he said 10 in 18 days

In all seriousness though, the poster up thread who said it was depressing that there are men using lockdown as a stick to beat the mother of their children with is right.

It's only really funny in my situation as Ds is an older teen (almost adult).

If this was ten years ago, I wouldn't be laughing as he would have used anything he could against me. He'd be rubbing his hand in glee over a situation like this if Ds was younger and he would have made my life a living hell over it.

So I'm sorry if anyone reads this and has been through similar, I've actually realised that it could have been a bit of a heartless thread to post.

I hope that a solicitor does not have to put up with his silly tantrums.

To stop the bullying of people like the late Robert Maxwell and others who have used the threat of the law, I have long argued that repeatedly threatening to sue or use the law should be a criminal offence. The exH would it seems come within any law but sadly it does not exist.

@lazarusb

I have a similar ex - although ds is 30 now so long gone from my life. He told ds that all the money he gave me in maintenance should be going directly to him as pocket money. I explained when ds was old enough that the money was towards his living costs and his dad was legally obliged to contribute. Ds asked how his living costs were £100 a week. I took a deep breath and showed him some bank statements - setting out the £22 a MONTH that I was actually getting. That stopped when ds was 13 because his dad had a baby with his new wife.

As a result of this and other stories, ds has no contact with his dad now. He won't even visit ds' house when he lived 5 minutes walk from him and has declined to attend birthday parties, graduation and ds' wedding - on the grounds that I'll be there.

Thats exactly what my Dh did. Broke it all down for Ds. His dad told him that if he went to live with him, he would get the maintenance money as pocket money just for him. That caused me a great deal of stress at the time when Ds was a hormone filled 13 year old wanting play stations a and expensive things we couldn't afford.

Brilliant.

My ExH once suggested that the maintenance should be given directly to our daughter as her clothing allowance. Think she was about 11 at the time. And he clearly had no idea about all of the other expenses....this was when he actually paid any maintenance, when I remarried he used that as an excuse to stop paying and tbh for the measly £100 a month he was giving me I can't even be arsed arguing with him any more.

What an idiot!!!

My exh had his solicitor write to me insisting that I remove my new blinds as he could no longer see into my new house..
Obviously I didn't..
He also wrote directly to a judge - bypassing his solicitor altogether- claiming I had applied for CB for ds against the court order and that only a custodial sentence would be appropriate..
He got into trouble for that one - and my barrister attended for free so stupid was the occasion!!

@WankPuffins it’s not a heartless thread. It’s laughing at someone who is being ridiculous. I’m in the position you set out but I’m laughing at your ex. Your son is obviously lovely as most mothers of teens I know would have packed his bags and dropped him off by now

Oh god 😂

Oh please, please let this bellend approach my firm - PLEASE!!!

@icedaisy

Brilliant OP.

I remember one Friday afternoon having a new client appointment booked in at 4pm. Notes said re residence order, unable to attend during usual appointment hours.

I didn't usually see people Friday afternoons, especially at the end of a duty week. I had been called out every night and wanted to get home ASAP.

He arrived 3.30pm, brilliant. Huge folder of papers, my heart starts to sink. Tells me he would like to apply for residence order of his 18 year old because he wasn't at the university he had gone to.

Fastest appointment ever. Think I was in the car by 3.35 and I made his day by not charging him, Made my weekthought I would be there all night.

You should have done your public duty and invoiced him so he wouldn't waste other legal professionals time again and threaten other people specifically his family with nonsense.

@WankPuffins this isn't a heartless thread. I think sometimes you have to laugh or you'd cry!
I'm shaking my head at some of the shit your ex has done. Your midwife is right, he is a dickhead.