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Original poster

Children’s choice of clothes - bad taste!!!

178 replies

Divebar · 26/10/2020 07:27

Yesterday we were shopping and saw that Schuh were having a sale so went in. I was interested in some boots for DD8. I would probably have chosen DMs or biker boots for her. DD came over and said “ I’ve seen these trainers and you’re probably going to hate them” - she was right. Pale pink Fila trainers with the chunky sole. I do hate them. She was obviously disappointed that I wouldn’t get them which made me feel a bit shit. I fully appreciate that as she gets older my opinion about clothing choices will be much less / non existent but how much of her clothes now do you think should be governed by her taste? Obviously Christmas is coming and I may buy the trainers in black or buy biker books which we’d both probably like. My question is not really about what I should buy but how you manage these differences in taste as they get more interested in clothes & fashion.

OP posts:
Original poster
Divebar · 26/10/2020 08:55

I think some of these comments are fair and some are ridiculous. It isn’t “cruelty” to not buy the bloody trainers.

I will get her the pink ones for Christmas. Wink

OP posts:
Original poster
Divebar · 26/10/2020 08:57

She was desperate for the biker boots so I got them. I can’t understand why the trainers are good but the boots are bad.

OP posts:
Ilovecheese53 · 26/10/2020 08:58

Nothing wrong with pedal pushers (they were on trend in the 90s) so I’m not sure how old you are but me and my friends were very happy with them.

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Original poster
Divebar · 26/10/2020 09:00

Ha ha. This was the 80’s. No I loved them... they were the first trendy thing I ever got. They had a coloured cord down the outside of the leg.

OP posts:
ParadeOfRemotes · 26/10/2020 09:08

Nothing wrong with not getting the shoes if they weren't on the list for that day, she doesn't need them or whatever. It's not that she'd be crushed by, but your reaction. Personally I wouldn't tell a young child that I didn't like their choice purely because it's a fact that I don't like them.

gamerchick · 26/10/2020 09:15

She likes biker boots - she was wearing biker boots yesterday. They are last years and are from Marks & Spencer’s. I hardly think they’re inappropriate. She has Dr Marten school shoes and I thought she might like the Chelsea boots. You can blast me for hating the pink trainers but you’re struggling to make me sound evil on those front

Does she though? Or does she just appease you because it's easier? She knew how you would react to pink and she was right, but she tried anyway. Saying you would get her them for Christmas but in black does say more about what you want. I'm glad you've changed your mind.

You can poo poo all you want, makes no odds to me. I'm going on your first post.

We all foist our preferences on our kids. I personally wouldnt do DMs or biker boots on any of mine unless they asked and then I would inwardly make a face.

ThatScottishGirl · 26/10/2020 09:17

Interesting thread. I have two children of similar ages and still choose and buy all of their clothes.

HauntedPencil · 26/10/2020 09:20

At some stage you'll have to let go! If you see getting the trainers for Christmas let her pick the colour. If you were there for boots not trainers that's fine.

You have to expect your tastes to diverge at some point, kids don't want to wear clothes picked by mum from Msrkseys forever.

Original poster
Divebar · 26/10/2020 09:21

Interesting thread. I have two children of similar ages and still choose and buy all of their clothes

Is that because they’re not interested @ThatScottishGirl or another reason?

OP posts:
Original poster
Divebar · 26/10/2020 09:23

You have to expect your tastes to diverge at some point

I agree. I would expect to have no influence at 13 but 8?

OP posts:
ThatScottishGirl · 26/10/2020 09:23

It’s just never really changed. Obviously as babies and toddlers I just bought what I liked and it’s not really developed into them choosing things. Possibly because I buy a lot of their clothes online and I’ve never really asked them to come and choose things. They’ve not expressed unhappiness with this though so maybe I will ask them how they feel.

SoupDragon · 26/10/2020 09:25

By that age I let DD pick her own things - it was pointless me choosing things (Unless they were safe bets!) as she wouldn't wear them. Mostly she could have what she wanted unless it was inappropriate.

That said, if it was boots she needed, I wouldn't have bought her trainers.

She used to put together some marvellous outfits... a fully fringed "flapper" type dress from Monsoon teamed with leggings and snow boots for tree climbing in the park 😂😂

TimeIhadaNameChange · 26/10/2020 09:25

My mum's very controlling and I'm sure I was a teen before I couod choose clothes from my wardrobe (she still chose what she bought for me). It was horrendous. I'm looking forward to letting my daughter choose what she wants to wear on a day-to-day basis, and when slightly older will listen to what she wants to buy. If not sexually inappropriate, affordable and suitable for purpose then fine with me.

SoupDragon · 26/10/2020 09:27

@Divebar

You have to expect your tastes to diverge at some point

I agree. I would expect to have no influence at 13 but 8?

It's a great age to start guiding her choices though. From a practical or appropriate point of view rather than taste. DD learnt which things weren't "right" for what she needed and I maintained an element of "control" to give her soft boundaries to push against. It seems to have worked OK.
Original poster
Divebar · 26/10/2020 09:27

does she just appease you because it's easier?

No this is bollox. She doesn’t appease me. I know you want to think I’m Miss Trunchball personified but she saw the biker boots and wanted them. They were pretty practical and worked for what we needed so I got them. I thought she might want another pair this year or something similar.

OP posts:
SoupDragon · 26/10/2020 09:28

DSs were completely different. Not interested in choosing their own stuff until well into their teens!

Original poster
Divebar · 26/10/2020 09:30

@SoupDragon

When you shop do you go with a plan or do you just gravitate towards things she likes?

OP posts:
gamerchick · 26/10/2020 09:32

@Divebar

does she just appease you because it's easier?

No this is bollox. She doesn’t appease me. I know you want to think I’m Miss Trunchball personified but she saw the biker boots and wanted them. They were pretty practical and worked for what we needed so I got them. I thought she might want another pair this year or something similar.

This is what you said.

Yesterday we were shopping and saw that Schuh were having a sale so went in. I was interested in some boots for DD8. I would probably have chosen DMs or biker boots for her. DD came over and said “ I’ve seen these trainers and you’re probably going to hate them” - she was right. Pale pink Fila trainers with the chunky sole. I do hate them. She was obviously disappointed that I wouldn’t get them which made me feel a bit shit

Nowhere in that does it say she wanted biker boots Hmm

I'm not trying to make you into anything. I'm going on your OP. It's not my fault you've changed the scenario.

Caeruleanblue · 26/10/2020 09:34

She's not he own person at 8
She's a developing person hopefully with loving adults around to guide her.

SoupDragon · 26/10/2020 09:35

We used to have a vague plan like "t shirts for holiday" or "you need jeans" and then I just followed her around and vetoed the truly inappropriate or impractical items (always with a reason like "too grown up" or something about practicality - TBH I had to veto very little).

She's 14 now and I have no input whatsoever!

gamerchick · 26/10/2020 09:36

Ah I get you, last year she wanted boots and you agreed because it was more your taste.

Now it's changed. She likes pink but knew you would object.

It gets better. Especially when they have money and go buy their own clothes. It's a learning curve for both parties. We all did it.

Original poster
Divebar · 26/10/2020 09:38

I’m not quite sure if your point @gamerchick. We stopped by because they had a sale on. I thought they might have boots reduced. I was thinking biker boots because she likes biker boots. She looked at the trainers and the pool slides. She got new trainers 2 weeks ago.

OP posts:
Love51 · 26/10/2020 09:41

If you were a Miss Trunchbull type she wouldn't have bothered asking!

However, if she is asking for crop tops has she seen them somewhere? Is she exposed to inappropriate youtube? If it is an older family member there isn't a lot you can do, but if it is media/ TV / music videos, you can exercise some boundary seeing there.

formerbabe · 26/10/2020 09:45

Just look at your thread title..."bad taste"

She's 8, she is not going to have the same taste as her mum. Look at what kids wear, it's not the same 'tasteful' stuff adults wear.

Yesterday, we went out...my dd wore Frozen trainers, and a coat with unicorns printed all over it. I wore jeans, plain khaki top and a plain black coat. I don't expect her to want to wear what I would wear.

BadTattoosAndSmellLikeBooze · 26/10/2020 09:45

I’ve always just let my kids choose what they want from when they were interested. They’ve never chosen anything inappropriate yet. 😬 I don’t always like what they choose but it would be weird if I did. I’m pretty good at knowing what they’ll like though.

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