Please talk me down, my son nearly died today

[FeatherLoverGod]

On holiday in Devon and Have had the worst day of my life today. DS11 who has autism got caught in a riptide and nearly drowned. Had to be rescued, nearly didn’t find him in the sea. I had to be rescued trying to rescue him. Coastguard called and everything. Lost sight of him when he was washing sand off His legs, he started swimming underwater and I thought I could see him but it was someone in the same wetsuit. I panicked and ran to the shoreline. somehow caught sight of a head bobbing once out of the water 30 metres out. I grabbed a man and screamed thats my boy please help me. He just swam for it. I followed and got sucked in, felt so powerless. A teenager pulled me out and dragged me back to shore by pulling me on his surfboard. Didn’t know if DSwas drowned or alive. Took 15 minutes for get him out as the riptide was so strong. Can’t believe he is alive. I feel utterly sick. Every time I look at the sea I just see that head bobbing and i could throw up. I know that at least he is safe now but it’s awful. That guy, Christ, I owe him everything. And the teenager that rescued me was his son. They were amazing. What a fucking day. I can’t stop crying and feel like such a shit mother. I just lost sight of him, there were so many kids in the water with wetsuits similar to his. He refuses to talk about it, won’t let me hug him etc as he hates that but I want to just grip him close to me and inhale him. Please help and talk me down

I've just googled Saunton sands & reviews say it is a lovely family friendly beach, maybe it would help you to write a review saying what happened to you & your ds to warn others of the danger. In the meantime be kind to yourself, you are both safe, try to not dwell on what could have happened. Maybe get your ds some lessons in water safety at some point.

This is a video clip of a 4 year old who floated half a mile out to sea on an inflatable just this week. WARNING - trigger warning - shows her rescue, though she doesn't appear remotely distressed. Those things in the sea can be dangerous for little ones too I think.

How terrifying for you OP, I’m so very glad both you and your DS are safe.

On holiday in Spain age 6 I had 2 near misses. The first I was on a lilo in the sea and was paddling out having fun floating around. I turned around and noticed that I could no longer pick my mum out on the beach and suddenly realised I was too far out. I frantically attempted to turn myself round to paddle back, luckily a lovely lady saw the panic on my face and took my back to shore and to my mum. The second was in the swimming pool at the hotel and I was playing in one of this inflatable rings, accidentally flipped myself over the ring but meant I got stuck head down in the water trapped upside down by the ring. Luckily my mum was paying attention and jumped in to rescue me.

With my own DC, we were on holiday and had hired a Villa with the in laws. We were all out by the pool DD1 age 8 learning how to swim DH supervising her, grandparents watching her progress. Me and DD2 3 sat by the edge of the pool were playing with the bucket and spades. I had taken my eyes away just a second to tie my hair back and DD2 has filled the bucket so full with water it was too heavy for her to pull back out, but refusing to let it go it pulled her into the pool instead. There was no splash, no scream, she had just slipped in. DH pulled her out by her leg, still upside down in the water still holding onto the bucket. This absolutely terrified me because I hadn’t even noticed she had gone into the water, it had happened so very fast, it takes me just seconds to tie my hair back and in that time she could have drowned, drowning is silent!

[quote Justaboy]**@Justaboy do you mean are rip tides a problem on the Norfolk coast because the answer is absolutely YES.

Okay coky on that!, its just that I've never heard them mentioned maybe I suppose as not that many people know abut them and what they can do!

We when i were a nipper used to go to Clacton and Frinton as they had a rail link back then, then sometimes Southwold thats the too much beer incident happened courtsey of the Sole Bay Inn there! then sometines Caister but in more recent times old Brancaster has been the place of choice as per the link below.

Can't remember big waves there always seems very calm unlike say the cornish coast! Went to Cromer once now that did look a bit rough there, remeber it well as they'd just launched the lifeboat for some faimily in a cabin crusier that really shoudlnt have gone out that day

Can you specify any Norfolk locations please?

Would old Hunstantion come into the list I wonder?.

OP how are you today?.

goo.gl/maps/L39ef1CnaqJrLipq8[/quote]
Waxham and Sea Palling In Norfolk are known for rips.

A 30 year old woman died at Waxham earlier this month, after being caught in one.

I hope you are both feeling somewhat better three days on.

Noted that RHOBHfan

This is probally the incident your referring too:(

www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-norfolk-53718034

Are these odd structes much to do with that?, some sort of sea erosion defence maybe?.

goo.gl/maps/5aUmTRtGENRM1MWo9

If they were in a kayak, it would more likely be the wind blowing them offshore rather than a ripcurrent, not impossible but kayaks get blown easily, and if there was any sort of wind that day, the wind would likely be what takes them over the current.

The structures are what you call a break water, you get them around some harbours and on certain bits of coastline, they do exactly as their names suggest, they cause waves to break there, and cause the water shore side of them to be considerably calmer. Basically in that instance they will stop the coast line taking a battering and either eroding or moving

Slight chage of direction the only way is well is up!.

How would we rescue this young lad if he were in trouble??

www.bbc.co.uk/news/av/world-us-canada-53927466

I have two children, and one is autistic. I think that's a big part of your response - in addition to the trauma of seeing your child struggling and in peril, is the feeling of hyper vigilance that parents of autistic children often feel. That hyper vigilance of exhausting, and it was thwarted by other factors - like a rip ride - that you can't control. That would be the tricky bit for me, I suspect, trying to sort out those feelings. Not sure if that will only make sense to me, or to other parents with children with a disability...