Answer the question above you. Wrong answers only. PART 2

[bearlyactive]

To answer the most recent question...

What to do to stop procrastinating?

Take a nap. Keep procrastinating until it gets boring.

And my next question is...

How long will it take for this thread to fill up?

Your washing machine is training for a triathlon.

Is it normal that I really get on with teenagers?

No?

When will my ankle/knee stop hurting? (Fell really hard earlier!)

Don't worry, bearlyactive, by this time next year your ankle and knee will be nearly better.

Why can I not learn to do long division?

Because its a long way off and to far away for you to see .

I have batch cooked 4 different meals , which one should I take to work tomorrow ?

Have a takeaway.

What age do you think you are sexiest?

50

Is it downhill all the way after 50?

No it's party central.

Why are homeworks only remembered at 10pm on Sundays in my house?

Because I did the homework.

Will I clear the kitchen before I go to bed?

Depends on how many people, sheep or trees you have in your kitchen at the moment.

Why is trying to get my DD to bed on a school night much more difficult than herding cats?

Because hearding cats is easy.

Why did I forget to turn my 3am alarm off ?

Because you wanted to thank the elves that visit your house at night to do all the cleaning and washing.

Why does my cat insist on kneading me with her claws out?

Because you haven't worshipped her enough. Remember, she is a Goddess and all must kneel before her.

Who has my motivation?

To Lost Motivation Land. Nobody knows the directions to get there.

What should I have with my pasta for dinner?

Chips

Why did I not put my washing this morning it's sunny now

If you had put washing on, there would now be a tornado I your area. You've saved a lot of bother.

My book is boring me. Should I continue with it?

No stop writing that one and start a thriller where sheep take over the world .

Why haven the bin men emptied my bin again

It's invisible to them.

What time is Our Fearless Leader making his announcement tomorrow?

When he decides whether he needs to go to work or can work from home, and can catch a bus but only if essential, or maybe he can walk but not for more than an hour... And it's Tuesday so it's safe to go to a restaurant for breakfast.

Should I have cleared out the craft supplies this morning?

As long as you did put them in your wardrobe & cleared out all of your clothes & threw them away.

What will the lovely Winston erm I mean Boris tell us what we must not do, but what we can do, but only if it's necessary but we can't do it though we should do if it's a sunny Thursday & there are 8 magpies sitting on the roof of the house opposite, though the house next door must have a red car in the drive, then the binmen must arrive at 10am on the dot & then Sylvia must put her 'Bridget Jones/Apple Catchers' on the washing line?

That's if Boris decides that it is safe for him to catch the bus to work from home tomorrow & wear his lucky thong at 5pm to make his waffle speech

God knows.

Did we all have a good sleep?

I spent the night dreaming I waas Boris and trying to hide. I went on a steam train, and to the Heineken museum amongst other places. (This is a case where the truth is wierder than any fictional answer I could come up with!)

What else will happen this year?

A new haemorrhagic fever will emerge.

Where the hell have I left my keys?

The Key Fairies came and took them away and you will never see them again.

How weird is it going to be to be back in the office for the first time since March?

Exceptionally weird, since you'll most likely be working from home tomorrow!

Why is Wix so bloody hard to work with?