Imagine you’re at a buffet table, what do you put on your plate?

[RedRed9]

The longest buffet table imaginable: loads of options.

What do you go for?

(I’m bored, hungry and love a buffet!)

Chicken wings
Cocktail sausages
Cheese sandwich
Rolls
Any kind of cupcake
Egg mayo and cress
Cheese straws
Scones

can we have a dessert buffet on a separate table? With a chocolate fountain? Fuckit 5 chocolate fountains. But no sorbet

@Morporkia OMG I’d love a chocolate fountain!

But no sorbet

I was in a restaurant years ago and the waitress said the special dessert what sorbet.

'Ooh. What sorbet?'

'It's sort of like a really frozen slushy'

Oooh a buffet.

Cheese and pineapple on sticks
Smoked salmon
Baguette sliced with butter
Coleslaw
Chocolate cake

*I don't like buffets much - I'm a veggie and quite awkward. I don't like things to get all mixed up on the plate.

BUT I do like:
Veggie sausage rolls
Onion bhajis or veggie pakora (ideally with mint yoghurt dip, but otherwise some chilli sauce)
Egg mayo sarnies
Crisps
A bit of salad
Cheese board, ideally with a nice hunk of bread
Celery sticks
And then all the cake*

Same as Remus for the same reason (though I do eat fish), so add prawn or mushroom vol au vents and some sort of quiche.

Proper samosas
Egg and creed sandwich triangle
Little spring rolls
Proper crunchy Crisps
Cocktail sausages
Cheese and pineapple skewers
Chicken drumsticks

Sausage rolls you cooked in oven
Cocktail sausages
Pringles
Buttered teacakes
Slices of cheese
Slices of beef
Bread sticks
Onion bhajis
Veg samosas
Breaded pakoras

Every dessert
Mini donuts
Cornflakes clusters
Mini muffins
Scones with jam and butter
Profiteroles
Jellies

Mine kind of looks like a kids party. None of this seafood rubbish or healthy shit. Give me cake and crap anyday!

Death Ray Stare - you are welcome to share my buffet, but please bring some trifle.

For those of you who are lovers of vols-au-vent..... feast your eyes on this beauty!

Served at Lunch Garden restaurants in Belgium - chicken and mushroom in a giant vol-au-vent, with proper Belgian chips.

Heaven on a plate

Buffet sandwiches give me the gip so I'd go for bhajis and samosas. Couscous salad. Pasta salad. Bread rolls. Open season on desserts, if there are any.

Chicken tikka
Tandoori chicken
Chicken bhuna
Chicken tikka masala
Pilau rice
Samosas
Bhajis
Raita, mango chutney
Peshwari naan
Garlic naan
Popadoms

My task for tomorrow is to download all the buffet suggestions on this thread, and to create THE ULTIMATE BUFFET.

I'm never happier than when I've done a buffet, it's all bloody delightful stuff. We had a buffet instead of Christmas Dinner one year, it was epic.

Chinese food, tofu, rice, noodles, congee, dim sum.

A bit of sushi too.

If a regular buffet I guess I'd eat the crudités (I'm vegan).

@lachy
When, where and would you like a deposit up-front for two omnivorous places? I’ll even supply a couple of dishes or at least some posh crisps. Happy to bring our own crockery & cutlery and napkins.

I'd like tiger prawns in some kind of chilli and lemon dressing
A hedgehog with pineapple and cheese sticks
green beans
some vine tomatoes with sea salt
Pizza slices

I keep coming back to this thread to merrily torture myself with thoughts of a) delicious buffet food, and b) being in a room with people other than my husband and children.

Pinching some of those tiger prawns, sky.

Can we all agree that food will be in individual containers though? I went on Pinterest to continue the imaginary buffet fun and kept getting pictures like this, which is just a recipe for soggy crackers.

@FadedRed

I remember my mum having a buffet years and years ago. She ended up with a beautiful serving dish because someone brought food with them and then never claimed it back!!

Lucky Mum! I’ve just got two mismatched cereal-type bowls that appeared after a party and have never been claimed. Nothing precious or decorative.

Cheri I have texture issues, and that picture makes me very uneasy. I therefore second your suggestion, and declare the motion carried.

Lighthearted. The way l feel at the moment, a box of condoms and the waiter. I’ve been eating too mych anyway and could do with some more exercise!

Smoked salmon and cucumber sandwiches cut in triangles
Hot pizza slices various toppings
Sweet potato fries
Cheese board
Ready salted crisps
Crusty bread and butter
Apple pie and ice-cream

Looks like I’m the only one helping myself to the bowl of coronation chicken.

Excellent.

Although I might side swipe some pork pie.

Nothing with mayo or things like Branson pickle and no seafood. I love the classics. Little sausage rolls and mini pork pies. And cocktail sticks with sausages, cheese, pineapple or pickled onions on! Obviously you don't get those any more but I think it's time for a come back. They can call it "retro" or some shit.

I'm actually not a massive fan of buffets though unless it's professionally catered. I hate the thought of the cat mad aunt with a filthy kitchen bringing the sandwiches or the cold quiche that's been sat out covered in foil since last night because there wasn't room in the fridge.
Give me a hot buffet straight from the venue's kitchens. Hot pizzas, warm pies, hot chicken drumsticks and sausages, garlic breads, crisp salad, freshly made sandwiches, mini cheesecakes and yummy cupcakes.