Friends offer. To stay in their secluded large country home,leaving tomorrow. Help.

[RubyViolet]

Husband just though cancer treatment. Declared cancer free only 1 month ago. Although he has to be tested every 3 months for foreseeable. Totally stressed.
Wonderful friends of 20 years offering us indefinite stay with them in their large country home. They are self isolated 7 days. We are self isolated 10 days.
It’s an hour from our place in central London, l am getting so anxious about my husband and getting shopping. They have acres and acres. Not far from major shopping towns in the county but isolated.
What do we need to consider. What is your advice. Leaving early tomorrow. Should we ?

Food shopping in central London vs food shopping somewhere less populated - I can see why the risk would be lower outside of cities. If they’d been self isolated for longer...

To the people on this thread saying they'd go: your attitude is putting our ability to go out at all at risk.

How difficult is it to comprehend? STAY AT HOME

OP glad you've decided to stay home. The NHS and the rural area you were thinking of going to, thanks you.

You have to consider that you're putting yourself in a rural setting which won't have the same facilities and support that London has.

You are far less likely to have access to things like community volunteer support or the food and medicine distribution hubs which are coming. If you don't drive you're making yourself very dependent on your friends for getting access to essentials like food and medical care. What if they fall ill? What if you fall out?

I live rurally and it's very easy to overlook how a remote location impacts on access to essential services.

Mumsnetters shouting at someone because they are trying to keep their OH who is extremely vulnerable safe.
How are they not safe in their present situation margaret? We’ll give you a minute to have an actual think about it. Ffs.

I'm not going to be as harsh as perhaps I feel about your proposed move to your friends country pile - there are so many issues with your idea of which previous posters have highlighted but here is the one thing that I think you need to consider: you've not been self isolating for long enough. Not you and your husband or the couple. My partner started showing symptoms yesterday: we have been strictly self isolating for 11 days.

You’re not getting ‘abuse’ - you’re just not getting the replies you want. People feel strongly and cross about this because it’s important.

Stay put! Despite your husband’s health issues (for which I sympathise), you are not an exception to the rule! Your friends are not an exception to the rule either. Of course they should not come and pick you up in their car!

It’s an emergency. Stay. At. Home. Three words...not difficult to decipher. They don’t have a special definition or a get out clause for you or anyone else who is stressed for whatever reason.
It’s that simple.

Where would you get food?

You asked, we said, NO STAY PUT!!

Do they have a cleaner? She may clean in lots of peoples houses and would be a superspreader of this virus even if she/he doesn’t ever get the virus.
Infection control is far more complex than most people realise. Obvious by the rapid spread of this virus. As a previous pp said the virus doesn’t move we move the virus.
It’s not just COVID-19 that your DH will be susceptible to, seasonal flu is still around, colds, norovirus, all the conditions you have been carefully protecting your DH from. Moving him to a lovely isolated country area may be more of a challenge to his immune system than you have bargained for.

FTFT THE OP IS STAYING AT HOME .

You shouldn't go.
It's not essential travel.
You're not supposed to house share with non family members.
You're not going to be able to sit 2 metres apart in the car.
They could already have it.

Stay at home.

*RTFT !

Stay at home. None essential travel. If your friend coming to collect you thats one none essential journey, you then get in the car, thats a group of more than two people which is against the recent advice then another none essential journey. The police will stop and fine you and with good reason. Stay at home!

Like all those dumbass motorhomers who sped off to the Highland. to ‘self-isolate’ but who were in fact only bringing their germs and needs to another community with very limited resources. They arrived to eat their food, use their local surgeries and generally deplete all their resources. Absolute weapons.
They all had health reasons for being there too...but were politely asked to fuck off home all the same.

Your husband is safer where you are, close to his medical support system. Stay at home.

Can’t you stay at home and get a friend or volunteer to drop off essentials so you are both not going anywhere
That would be the lowest risk option

Aside from the fact the PM clearly stated no seeing friends during lockdown, why on earth would you consider moving him far away from where his consultant is based so soon after his treatment's ended? What if he feels ill suddenly – you expect him to go to an overstretched rural hospital where they have no knowledge of his medical history? Sorry, but it's irresponsible.

You are not safer in an isolated place than you are staying inside, one exercise etc. It might feel naturally like you want to go but it’s not the right way to go.

Awww you live in London, the rules don't apply to you do they, like they don't the rest of London. I'm not really sure which part of stay indoors and don't see friends you aren't getting? We live in the north and haven't been near a shop in over a week, we haven't seen anyone we know either. By your logic we can go and hang out with our daughter's nursery friend and family as they have been self isolating for 2 weeks. Oh wait no, we aren't as we listened to what was said and are actually following!!

I don't recall boris saying, "now if you live in London, this doesn't apply, please travel to stay with friends in the countryside and infect the locals where there isn't the hospital space to cope".

Not sure why "stay at home" is that hard to understand, my 4 year old gets it.

Its obviously a really frightening time for you and your husband given his health, but there are literally millions of us high risk people in this country and it will be catastrophic if people start moving around. We have to all follow the rules in the same way in order for this to save lives.

To put it into perspective op. I am ill. Day 10 of either a nasty bug of coronavirus. Possibly with pneumonia and got antibiotics yesterday. (I know it will only help if this has turned bacterial). Dh and dd have zero symptoms and have been isolating with me for 7 days. Just because your friends have zero symptoms, it doesn’t mean they’re free from nasty, potentially deadly germs.

There are some really nasty posts on here from people, probably with zero experience of long term and devastating illness. Stay home, stay safe and ignore the nastiness.

Oops correction Dh and dd have been isolating with me for 10 days.

you can't guarantee that your lovely friends, or yourself, aren't already infectious - not everyone shows symptoms. the self isolation you have all been doing does not totally eliminate risk of infection it just reduces it. travelling anywhere, and seeing anyone, increases that risk. please don't do it.

Sorry OP, this is not about you, it’s about keeping everyOne safe.