Friends offer. To stay in their secluded large country home,leaving tomorrow. Help.

[RubyViolet]

Husband just though cancer treatment. Declared cancer free only 1 month ago. Although he has to be tested every 3 months for foreseeable. Totally stressed.
Wonderful friends of 20 years offering us indefinite stay with them in their large country home. They are self isolated 7 days. We are self isolated 10 days.
It’s an hour from our place in central London, l am getting so anxious about my husband and getting shopping. They have acres and acres. Not far from major shopping towns in the county but isolated.
What do we need to consider. What is your advice. Leaving early tomorrow. Should we ?

If we became ill, we would probably be going to the same hospitals. Their place isn’t too far , we could be back at the cancer unit that is treating my husband in about 50 minutes.
It’s the stress and only the stress that is making us consider the invitation.

This is going to become known as doing a Kirsty (Allsop) :-)

Unwise decision.

Technically it is against the rules but it sounds like the safest thing for you to do. If you get any symptoms then how will you get shopping in, when your husband must be on the at risk list? And presumably this isn't somewhere so rural you'd be overloading a tiny hospital in an emergency if it's only an hour out of central London?

'If we became ill'... it's not a bloody cold! And you would be taking up valuable hospital space that the NHS simply doesn't have at the minute. Take a read of the thread 'This is our reality. Please stay inside' by a nurse who is risking her life because idiots don't stay at home when told to.

This is NOT essential travel and you are NOT an exception to the advice.

On top of that, the fact that you would risk it when your husband presumably has a lowered immune system from cancer treatment is actually unbelievable and frankly ridiculous. Give your head a bloody good shake.

Thanks all. Considering the treatment of my husband.
I think that has to be the main thing and from the advice here l think we need to stay close to our hospital and experts.
I hadn’t thought of it like that.
We both just wanted to escape the utter rubbish of the last two years of his treatment I suppose .

FGS. Why do people think the rules don't apply to them?

I finished my 27th day of radio yesterday.

I am now confined to barracks.

Stay in.

Do not be so fucking selfish

The virus doesn't move, you move the virus.

My 18 year old gets it, he is twitching with the effort of staying indoors, but he gets it.

Give your head a wobble, and get a bloody grip

Stay. The fuck. Home.

It’s not difficult.

The only thing you’ll be doing is increasing the risk threefold by introducing more people into the mix.

Essentials will still need to be bought. And if your wonderful friends aren’t as fastidious about washing their hands as you probably are then you’re fucked.

Yep, OF COURSE you can't go.

Whilst I feel for your situation, you’re still not getting it.

No. The ‘main’ consideration is not you choosing where to stay based on your husband.

It’s following advice that keeps everyone safe. And god forbid you have it, the rural town you’re considering will have vulnerable people of their own and don’t bloody want it.

This is why the fucking army are needed because people can’t be trusted to follow the most basic rules.

We are people being offered charity from friends. In the truest sense.
They are being kind. They are not bad people.
We have to decide whether to accept.
We are not bad people. We are stressed people.

I asked here because l wasn’t certain it was the right thing to do.

You've been through such a traumatic time; sounds like it will be a fabulous place to recuperate once things have settled down and travelling is safer. Wishing you well.

No OP.

The advice is to STAY AT HOME.

Regardless, if they haven't self-isolated for days prior to your arrival you're seriously putting your husband at risk. They could be incubating the virus and have passed it on to you and your husband before you even get out of their car.

I think everyone should follow the rules...

But in your case, yea I would go.

NO.

*if they haven't self-isolated for 14 days prior to your arrival

People can have the virus with zero symptoms. Imagine if your friends are these people who unknowingly introduce it tou your husband.

How on earth can you know for sure they haven't got it? How do you know that they have been meticulous. The sheer fact that they are coming to collect you they could contaminate themselves - at the petrol pumps, by meeting someone etc.. How can you stay 2 metres apart in a car? I reckon its not safe. I would stay put.

Tbh, its a bit of a strange offer. Are they expecting you to socialise with them? I would give it a wide berth.

I asked here for sound advice, not abuse. The last 2 years of my life have been spent being with my husband through his cancer treatment.
What is happening to people on here ?
I am ready to hear opinions and advice, l wanted that. It’s helped me make my decision.
I don’t need abuse.
Some responses are so aggressive and over the top. Yes l am asking something that is a massive moral dilemma, but that is why am l am asking it here. I wanted your opinions. Not abuse.
We are in danger of people not being able to ask anything. Peace.

7 and 10 days isolation isn’t enough to know no one is carrying the virus. Some people have it but remain symptom free.

The restrictions on movement are there for good and seriously important reasons.

Sorry life is stressful. We’re all stressed and worried now though

I think everyone is stressed about this but it must be so hard for you and people with underlying medical conditions. I get the temptation but tbh at the moment you are in control of what happens. If you go to theirs, I reckon you will lose control and feel pressured to socialize.

You will act differently in someone else's house and have to trust their assurances.