Can’t stop thinking about this comment..

[sunshinegirl13]

(Sorry if this is a long post but I will only add what is needed for context)

Throughout all of my adult life I have been a size 8 but due to complications with endometriosis and blood clots last year, I got the contraceptive injection to stop my periods and as a result of this my thyroid has become under active and I have now gained a lot of weight and am now a size 14.

This year I have lost a stone and have been trying really hard to get back into shape as I feel so down about the way I look. This was inspired by the goal of a two week holiday abroad that I went to on the 3rd of December.

I got myself lots of new nice clothes and made a real effort to try and build my self confidence. I mostly felt ok in what I was wearing and could feel almost stylish.

However, one day on the holiday I went to a shopping complex on the beach with my DM. I was wearing a swimsuit with a skort cover up over the top and I felt like I looked nice for a change as I felt the swimsuit flattered My curves and the skort was flattering on my stomach.

As I was browsing the shop a lady selling something on a market stall called out to me and said “do you know how disgusting you look from the back?” I at first thought I had miss-heard her and looked confused so she repeated “Do you know how disgusting you look?” I was so upset and confused I tried to walk away but my DM (who was previously looking in a shop) walked over to join me. The women then shouted to her “are you her mother?” To which my mum replied yes. I walked away to escape the situation but my DM approached her and she repeated about how disgusting I looked to her. I walked to a near by bench and cried my eyes out. My mother complained to the manager of the shop her market stall was out but I ended up cutting our shopping day short as I felt so self conscious.

At first I thought it could’ve been because my skirt was short (not indecent - especially for the beach) but there were girls wandering around in their bikinis (and even a girl in a thong bikini standing next to the shop).

I can’t stop thinking about this comment and thinking about how fat and grotesque I must look for a random women to say this. I have never felt more insecure and I don’t know how to speed up the weight loss process more than I can. I can’t come off the injection as it’s the only thing helping with my endometriosis that works. I just feel so disappointed in myself and unhappy.

My mum believes this happened because I have a very prominent hour glass figure (which is true but a wobbly belly) and that the women felt I looked ‘disgusting’ as it was sexier than most others but I feel like my DM is just trying to make me feel better and can’t stop over thinking.

I don’t really know what the point in this post is but maybe to get some tips on how to stop overthinking those cruel words, every time I close my eyes at night to go to bed I just repeat it over and over in my head.

Sorry for the long winded vent post

I would kill for your figure. I am a size 8-10 with a wobbly tummy (skinny fat or whatever its called) and no waist to speak of. You have a stunning figure.
Now.... I wish I could go back to my twentys and give myself a shake. All the grief i suffered thinking i was a hideous beast. What a monumental waste of energy. Stop thinking about it. There is so much more to life than how other people see your body.

Wowzer girl!! Banging Bod!! (as my bloke would say)

@sunshinegirl13

I am baffled as to why anyone would say that to you because you have a cracking figure.

She is obviously deranged. I am so sorry you were upset. Your figure is cute and you look so lovely in that little outfit.

Please forget about this. She is BATSHIT!!!!!!!!!!!

Wow you have a lovely figure, please ignore the nasty comments

@BaubleTheLumpOfCoal I honestly wish it was as I felt like the comment had almost ruined my holiday and has made me feel shitty. But it really isn’t at all. I am so shocked at the response the photo I uploaded has gotten as I was adding to show the length of the skort rather than anything else. I posted the photo to reflect the length, the swim dress also hides my wobbly tummy quite well

Omg I wish I looked like that!!!

At a size 14 you most definitely won't be anything close to grotesque. The woman sounds as if she has some issues. Please don't let this upset you. x

Op you have a stunning figure! Woman is obvs jealous!

You have a really lovely figure! What is wrong with some people honestly? I feel your pain as I too am on the injection and have been for almost a year but luckily I have only gained a few pounds (I'm already a size 16). I used to suffer horrendous periods and it's the only thing that helps

Go online and read some of the vitriolic nonsense that some of the most beautiful Hollywood actresses have been subjected to about their looks. When you hear that hey have been told they are too ugly to look at, sacked because the lead man doesn't feel turned on when he acts with them, told they are fat for not being anorexically thin, then you realise that these sorts of comments only tell you about the attacker and nothing abotu the peron on the receiving end of them.

If you can't get it out of your head maybe it's because you share their view, Moving rapidly from slim to overweight is a real confidence knock (happened to me, also because of medication) and it can take a while to come to terms with it. You really do need to give yourself a talking to, and say: I can either feel shy and ashamed and shit or I can feel happy and confident and active. One is more fun than the other.

And FWIW you look stunning in that photo. What an incredible shape.

I just can’t understand how I could’ve offended her so much simply by the way I looked to make her want to say something. I would never say someone looked disgusting or even think it (unless they were covered in something disgusting). I just can’t wrap my head around it because the concept is so alien to me. But I am now agreeing with posters saying she must of had something not right about her or was having a bad day and took it out on me.

Blimey! You are stunning, that is what you call abombshell body!

Of course I biased, but I think my DD is gorgeous. She has a definite 'cupid bow; lip shape. She was on a night out a few years ago, aged around 21, and an older woman came up to her in toilets and said something like "I wouldn't wear that shade of lipstick with your lips"! When she recounted it to me I was furious, I felt like being an avenging angel type and stalking this unpleasant woman down. Down right nasty thing to say to another woman. Unfortunately, you always get them :(

I also want to clarify that I think women of all sizes are beautiful and not grotesque, it was her comment towards me as ‘disgusting’ that made me feel I looked grotesque not my weight. My weight gain was mentioned for context of the relation to playing that comment in my head and making the connection to the difference in my size between now and last year. There are many many gorgeous plus size women and all bodies are lovely just different. I just felt ugly as being described as grotesque.

Sorry OP, forgot to add the photo is great, you look fab.

Disgusting* not grotesque sorry!

@StillNumb I’d kill for a beautiful Cupid’s bow! Some people are so unnecessarily nasty, I just don’t understand the incentive. What do they gain?!?

Your mum is spot on. Some people do think sexy women are disgusting. And how dare you show off in flattering clothing you hussy😂.

Take no notice, or take it as the compliment it os😊

You look absolutely amazing in that picture! Your fugure is to die for! As hard as it is please get that woman out of your head just a jealous bitter woman xxx

She was clearly a fruit loop! Enjoy your body, it looks fabulous! I’d swap figures in an instant ( I’m 35, a size 20 and more of an apple shape) Don’t let this woman knock you confidence. In your early 20’s it’s easy to absorb the negative. By 30 you won’t care anymore. Most negative comments from others are more about how they feel about themselves rather than you x

A random woman shouted at you in a holiday location while you were wearing holiday clothes? I'm assuming you weren't the biggest person there and the stall holder depends on income from selling to people of all shapes and sizes. Why she would risk her livelihood to insult a complete stranger?

@Kathulu I know, I just don’t understand it!!!!

To be forewarned when someone is about to insult you publicly and loudly would be a great thing. Had someone done to me what they did to the OP I like to think I could shout out while stepping away "oh my god your breath stinks, did you eat shit for breakfast"

Of course I doubt I could do it as it would be stooping to the same level as the insulting cow but a nice thought all the same.

You are bloody stunning! Your body is amazing. And I'm not just being kind, I wouldn't have posted if I didn't believe it to be true

Until I saw the pic I would have said she was rude and slightly socially unhinged. But she was jealous. You looked fab. Really not a sympathy compliment.
You look great and she was a rude, jealous and socially impaired cow.
Good luck with your health issues and know that she was the problem not you!