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Original poster

Do I message him?

212 replies

Ouchmyheadhurts · 14/09/2019 18:07

I have noticed that My ‘one that got away’ is now single (via Facebook).... we were together S teens.... had a dalliance in our 20’s, brief contact a couple of years ago but he then started a new relationship. He’s now single... I’m so tempted to message him..... do I???

OP posts:
Mamasaurus82 · 15/09/2019 18:02

I think you should friend request him. Good luck x

Original poster
Ouchmyheadhurts · 15/09/2019 20:02

Well that little bit of joy was short lived.... he’s back in a relationship with his ex according to Facebook Sad I’m guessing if the message delivered I can’t delete it??

OP posts:
dancemom · 15/09/2019 20:04

You can delete it, just keep your finger on the message until the options to copy forward or delete come up

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incognitomum · 15/09/2019 20:04

I think you can delete.

Sorry about that Sad

Original poster
Ouchmyheadhurts · 15/09/2019 20:07

It says ‘remove for you’ which means he will still see it....... Sad

What a tit I am. I honestly thought that was my chance. I guess he’ll always have to be the one that got away.

OP posts:
HelloCanYouHearMe · 15/09/2019 20:08

Don't delete it.

Original poster
Ouchmyheadhurts · 15/09/2019 20:08

I haven’t. There’s no point as he will see it anyway. I’m gutted.

OP posts:
GooGoo52 · 15/09/2019 20:21

I'm gutted for you, but at least you tried. If you hadn't, you would have always wondered.

AnchorDownDeepBreath · 15/09/2019 20:25

Ah, I'm sorry. I was going to confirm that it won't go into his hidden inbox if you've messaged before. I'm sorry his status has changed again. I guess he has unfinished business with that ex - don't delete your message, he'll still see it anyway. Just leave it be.

All the best Thanks

TraceyHorrobin · 15/09/2019 20:26

Disappointing. Sorry to hear that.

However... isn't it a bit immature to be broadcasting relationship status on fb and updating back and forth like that? Maybe he's not such a catch after all.

You'll meet someone better! X

Original poster
Ouchmyheadhurts · 15/09/2019 20:29

No idea Tracey..:. I don’t have a relationship status on FB, i don’t think I ever have? It was definitely single yesterday....

OP posts:
TraceyHorrobin · 15/09/2019 21:01

Maybe turn this into a proactive positive opportunity... The way you felt your sap rising when you thought there may be a chance with the 1 that got away is telling you that you are ready for a relationship or at least a frisson and some romance!

Get off Facebook and get on Tinder/ Bumble/ POF/ OLD of your choice!

I met DP on Tinder... Now we have house, ddog and DD! Best thing I ever did!

Usernamealreadyexists · 15/09/2019 21:14

Ahhh I’m sorry it turned out this way. I find it odd he hasn’t your message though if he has changed his status since you sent it.

chesterdraws1 · 15/09/2019 21:18

Oh sorry OP. I didn't even realise people still updated their relationship status on FB. Most people I know have status' that are about 10 years out of date!

roseunicornblower · 15/09/2019 21:19

Please don't be embarrassed about messaging him. You didn't send him anything bad. Hope your ok.

notanotherfucker · 15/09/2019 21:29

If I ever found the one of mine that got away on Facebook and single I wouldn't hesitate! This guy has zero social media presence and I have searched and searched... I would have done the same.

InTheTempest · 15/09/2019 21:37

Sorry OP 🍷🍰💐

I'd feel gutted but still glad I didn't wimp out of giving it a shot.

I definitely agree that you should get on Tinder. Get on out there and see who else is around. I'm trying to take my own advice atm as well 😄

Original poster
Ouchmyheadhurts · 16/09/2019 06:47

Thabks everyone. I think I’m just pissed off witg myself. I physically haven’t seen him for 9 years. I just want to be over him. I still love him after all this time and that’s pathetic. Iv tried having other relationships since then but they never worked for various reasons.

I don’t really want to go on tinder, I don’t want one night stands and friends have said it’s full of weirdos.... I really have had enough dramas and don’t want anymore!

Im ok single.... I’m not desperate for a relationship or anything....

OP posts:
Boobindoop · 16/09/2019 07:05

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
Ouchmyheadhurts · 16/09/2019 07:15

boo that’s exactly what I have always thought.... but maybe Iv been very stupid thinking that?? I don’t know but I want to be over him now. I’m not ‘waiting’ for him as Iv carried on, I have kids (he knows that) Iv tried relationships and do stuff etc.... he’s just always there, and Iv always had this ‘feeling’ he would come back. Pathetic really saying that out loud Blush

OP posts:
Original poster
Ouchmyheadhurts · 16/09/2019 07:17

I really thought people would tell me to get a life on this thread, really grateful that no one has Flowers

OP posts:
Footle · 16/09/2019 07:19

Tell that person in your head to shut up and sit down - that woman who keeps telling you you're pathetic. You're not.

Michellelovesizzy · 16/09/2019 09:27

Did he reply x

TheRobotsAreComing · 16/09/2019 09:52

Sorry OP.

If theyve broken up then got back together perhaps they're not that strong so don't lose hope!

I'd keep the message there and strike up the friendship maybe?

Original poster
Ouchmyheadhurts · 16/09/2019 11:57

From what I can gather having chatted with a friend (friend of a fiend type thing of his) they have broken up a couple of times.......

The message still says delivered but not seen. Not much else I can do.... I don’t want to friend request now Iv seen his back with her....

OP posts: