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Original poster

Friend wants her DH to come on all female holiday.

999 replies

Oldbutstillgotit · 16/06/2019 09:43

A few months ago a good friend , Anne, invited me and 2 other friends Barbara and Carol on holiday (These are not real names but I thought it would be easier than ABC etc) .
The background is that Anne has had a terrible few years and has needed a lot of support which we have willingly given. Thankfully she is now much better so decided that she wanted to treat us . She insisted that she was paying for a villa in the sun for a week plus flights . Very generous and we all said it wasn’t necessary but Anne really wanted to do this.
Further information, to avoid drip feed, is that Anne, Barbara and I have known each other for other 30 years since our DC were in Primary School. Anne knows Carol through a couple of interests but Barbara and I have met Carol several times and she has always been pleasant and fun.
Anyway, the villa and flights were booked and everything was fine. Until yesterday. I switched on my phone to a flurry of messages on our WhatsApp group, starting with Carol asking if it is ok if her DH comes on holiday ! Anne replied saying “ very funny, of course not”.
There are then loads of exchanges which are basically Carol saying that she has never been away from her DH for a week , the thought is making her anxious , he would be “ no bother” etc etc . To everything Anne has said no but Carol kept pushing. She even said that if they had the bedroom with the ensuite we would hardly see him !
I contacted Anne to see if she was ok . She was quite upset .
Yesterday afternoon, Anne , Barbara and I met for a coffee to discuss . Both Barbara and I said the decision was Anne’s but neither of us was happy at the prospect of a DH being there as it would totally change the dynamic.
The 4 of us are meeting for lunch later . Anne says she will cancel if Carol persists .
Anyone any suggestions ?

OP posts:
Throughthenever · 19/06/2019 16:03

What I dont understand is that its not really a free holiday for them because dick had to pay for his own flight.....

Also op we will need you to start a new thread before this ones runs out...

OralBElectricToothbrush · 19/06/2019 16:05

Look, you're supposed to be Anne's friend, right, and Anne's a bit of a soft touch. So personally, you and Barbara need put a little steel in her scabbard and joint message this CFer bitch and her cunt husband:
'Look, we all know about Dick's boasting to people about your 'free' holiday in Spain, all the bullshit you spouted about being anxious when really you were after ripping the piss out of Anne and spoiling our holiday with your bulling arse of a husband. Now we know he was rude and shouty trying to find out where we are staying with some bollocks story about surprising us. That's some seriously stalky crappy length to go to to try to force oneself on other people. Let's just get this straight now: the pair of you are cheeky, pisstaking arses and we want nothing to do with either of you. NOTHING. We will not put up with Dick's bullying and thinking he can be rude and aggressive and get his way. Just nope. That may work with you and others, but not with us. So here's what's what: you have no place to stay there, you will not find out where we are, if you do and even knock on the door we're calling the police. Just STOP bothering us, trying to bully us, pretending you're 'bewildered' that no one wants your loud, rude, bossy, entitled husband around anywhere and fuck off. Forever. You don't exist to us.'

Please advise Anne to cancel Carol's ticked and not tell her.

Feeling sorry for Carol is stupid, she's a cheeky, bullshitting bitch.

BishopofBathandWells · 19/06/2019 16:06

Blatantly placemarking for an update. Agree with PPs that Anne should cancel Carol's flight. It's almost a certainty that C&D will simply attempt to inveigle their way into the villa - and that could become extremely unpleasant.

prettybird · 19/06/2019 16:07

If Dick Head booked his flights as soon as his wife confirmed her "free" holiday, then he probably got his flights very reasonably. Therefore as far as he is concerned, the accommodation part of his holiday was going to be free Hmm

Original poster
Oldbutstillgotit · 19/06/2019 16:07

Anne spoke to Carol who denied that Dick had phoned but couldn’t give another explanation. When asked where she and Dick were staying , Carol said they were still looking. As we go in less than a week, Anne decided that she had had enough and has cancelled Carol’s flight . I know some people thought she should do that and not let on but that really isn’t Anne’s style and has sent her a message letting her know .

OP posts:
BishopofBathandWells · 19/06/2019 16:08

@Oldbutstillgotit Thank goodness! This must all be terribly distressing for poor Anne.

forumdonkey · 19/06/2019 16:08

What I dont understand is that its not really a free holiday for them because dick had to pay for his own flight.....

@Throughthenever, his flight might have only cost him a couple of hundred quid so it's not a lot for two adults in Spain for a week. You'd be lucky to get a hotel for the weekend in York for that

Twisique · 19/06/2019 16:09

It seems to me to be the only thing left to do to preserve the holiday, otherwise you are all on tender hooks waiting for Dick to appear.

forumdonkey · 19/06/2019 16:10

Go Ann.! High five that lady !

Willow2017 · 19/06/2019 16:11

Of course they haven't booked anything!
They always intended just to rock up with bs story about no accomodation and guilt trip everyone into letting them stay for free.

(He isnt boasting about a free holiday for nothing!)

Utterly self absorbed chancers. I would be having stern words with Carol about her and her dhs actions and telling her to grow wings as i had cancelled her free flight and the friendship.

OralBElectricToothbrush · 19/06/2019 16:12

You can tell Carol off yourself then. Glad Anne saw sense and cancelled their flights. They had no intention of finding another place to stay, either of them, 'still looking', my arse. She knows he rang. She is fully on board with his bullying bollocks. Fuck her off.

BlackAmericanoNoSugar · 19/06/2019 16:12

Yay, go Anne! I hope you all have a fabulous time.

EdtheBear · 19/06/2019 16:14

Go Ann she might not get much back but at least she'll save thr tax and the hassle of C&D Head turning up

prettybird · 19/06/2019 16:14

Dick Head will be mightily pissed off that his "free" holiday is now costing him even more: he either has to waste the cost of his own flights, or add to the them new flights for Carol and the cost of accommodation.

Part of me feels sorry for Carol - but part of me thinks that she made her won bed Hmm and had plenty of opportunities to either back out (if it was genuine anxiety) or ask for help from supportive friends (who she has now lost Sad)

All of me feels sorry for Anne, who really didn't deserve this stress from what should have been (and still is) a lovely gesture to her friends. But at least she now knows who her true friends are!

I hope the three of you have a fabulous time! GinWineFlowers

BernadetteRostankowskiWolowitz · 19/06/2019 16:14

Well done Anne!!

AnotherEmma · 19/06/2019 16:14

Well done Anne!

krustykittens · 19/06/2019 16:15

Poor Anne, she must feel mortified. But I am glad she cancelled Carol's flights. She was trying to give a friend a gift but Carol has shown her true colours. She's no friend at all.

eddielizzard · 19/06/2019 16:17

WTAF!!! Did Dick think he'd just pitch up at the new villa and expect to be welcomed with open arms? Who the hell is this person? Who thinks this is an acceptable way to behave?!?

Extraordinary.

BookwormMe2 · 19/06/2019 16:18

Well played, Anne! She's done the right thing. They clearly were planning to just rock up and force you into accommodating them. And I agree with PP - Carol is enabling his behaviour and knows it.

Ambydex · 19/06/2019 16:18

That will be a big weight off for Anne. Hopefully she can just look forward to the holiday now.

IHeartArya · 19/06/2019 16:19

My gosh the stress Anne must be under when she was supposedly doing something nice. The gall of some people.

CadburysTastesVileNow · 19/06/2019 16:20

Do tell them about the villa. Say you've been able to change to a smaller one since she's not going, no ensuite, no spare beds at all.

Weezol · 19/06/2019 16:22

Please ask the airport taxi driver to hold up a sign saying 'Ann, Barbara & Carol' on the off chance that the CFs still use the same flight.

BumbleBeee69 · 19/06/2019 16:24

Finally... she's cancelled her flights.. and quite right too Flowers

Drum2018 · 19/06/2019 16:24

Fair play to Anne for cancelling the flight. Hope they just piss off and stay home instead of booking a seat for Carol, seeing as Dick is already booked on it, but I doubt they'll go to the expense. Cheap lousy fucking twats!