Friend wants her DH to come on all female holiday.

[Oldbutstillgotit]

A few months ago a good friend , Anne, invited me and 2 other friends Barbara and Carol on holiday (These are not real names but I thought it would be easier than ABC etc) .
The background is that Anne has had a terrible few years and has needed a lot of support which we have willingly given. Thankfully she is now much better so decided that she wanted to treat us . She insisted that she was paying for a villa in the sun for a week plus flights . Very generous and we all said it wasn’t necessary but Anne really wanted to do this.
Further information, to avoid drip feed, is that Anne, Barbara and I have known each other for other 30 years since our DC were in Primary School. Anne knows Carol through a couple of interests but Barbara and I have met Carol several times and she has always been pleasant and fun.
Anyway, the villa and flights were booked and everything was fine. Until yesterday. I switched on my phone to a flurry of messages on our WhatsApp group, starting with Carol asking if it is ok if her DH comes on holiday ! Anne replied saying “ very funny, of course not”.
There are then loads of exchanges which are basically Carol saying that she has never been away from her DH for a week , the thought is making her anxious , he would be “ no bother” etc etc . To everything Anne has said no but Carol kept pushing. She even said that if they had the bedroom with the ensuite we would hardly see him !
I contacted Anne to see if she was ok . She was quite upset .
Yesterday afternoon, Anne , Barbara and I met for a coffee to discuss . Both Barbara and I said the decision was Anne’s but neither of us was happy at the prospect of a DH being there as it would totally change the dynamic.
The 4 of us are meeting for lunch later . Anne says she will cancel if Carol persists .
Anyone any suggestions ?

What @soola said. Perfect message.

Oh my God, the man has absolutely no shame. What, he thought they could just turn up at the villa and bully their way into staying??? I think Anne needs to message Dick and tell him in no uncertain terms to back off because his behaviour is straying into harassment. It could be that Carol's too worn down/scared to put him straight about it being a girls only holiday and he's not taking her seriously.

what @soola said

I agree with soola but I’d also be changing to the week before! I’d rather lose ££ already shelled out on flights rather than risk them turning up.

Carol clearly needs some help if she can’t manage a week without her DH but that’s not your cross to bear.

I think it's got to the point where you need to tell them that if Dick turns up at the villa you will immediately call the police.

And tell the villa owner not not give them any details whatsoever.

Agree with what Soola wrote. Is there anyway someone could have a strong word with Dick directly? or hogtie him until your flight is safely away

Another way to deal with them is to ask Carole where have they got booked....confirm if they are still planning to travel....so Anne can cancel the flighr if they aren't.

Myself and the other two ladies do not want our relaxing holiday ruined by you and your husband turning up uninvited and because of this you leave me no option but to cancel your flight.

Great message, but don't use "myself" in that way unless you want to come across as a fat-tied car salesman.

Barbara, X and I do not want...

Jesus christ.

What is Anne planning to do?

No fucking way.

I’m speechless. Anne really does need to message Carol and tell them to back off rather aggressively now though.

it’s the same owner . She is an expat friend of a friend who has a few properties

So if Carol and Dick know this, it seems he was actually trying to get the address of the new villa? You do realise that he's not going to give up, don't you, and will no doubt be quizzing everyone you know in the hope of rescuing his free holiday?

Personally I wouldn't be making any assumptions about the state of their relationship; it's their business and anyway the whole thing's gone beyond that now. Hard to see any alternative to simply cancelling Carol's flight, though whether Anne will be prepared to do this is something else, but I'd certainly be telling Carol in words of one syllable exactly what's thought of her husband's behaviour ... who knows, it might even help with her "bewilderment"

Hold on how did Dick know that the new villa owner was the same as the old villa owner? And if Anne said they were in the email that wasn't very sensible

Wow! I think maybe carol needs to be told less politely to back the fuck off! This is incredible. Dick is batshit!

this is just astonishingly incredible! Poor Anne.

What myrtle said, bit strange to ring the owner of the previous villa ...

I know this is your life, but at the same time, it’s the best story ever! It’s like the Golden Girls, but not as 80’s or American!!!
Dick really is living up to his name!!!

Ive just found this thread and am reading it open mouthed at the sheer cfuckery of these people!

After this latest update I definitely agree that carol should have her flight cancelled! And then anne should send the email informing her of such

Id cancel the flight first before sending the email so that carol cant try and get anne to change her mind, anne will be able to say its too late as already cancelled

Just to be clear I know no more than anyone else, but if a couple of PPs mean what they appear to, it's worth mentioning OP's a pretty longstanding poster who doesn't seem in the habit of making things up

I guess anyone who doubts the thread is free to mention it to MNHQ though ... after all, isn't that what they ask us to do?

Oh my goodness!! Cheeky man ringing up the villa owner asking for the address! At least they still don't know the address. C.f. on the highest level here!

I'm sorry but i think her flight needs to be cancelled now-Shes been told several times now its not on and yet her dick husband is still carrying on and intedning to turn up and get free board from Anne-I wouldnt be surprised now if they follow you from the airport

It doesnt matter what shes done for her in the pastif we lived by that rule there would be mayhem

I think Anne needs to cancel that ticket of Carol’s!