My mother is a fucking bitch. Anyone else's mother one too?

[Gottalovesummer]

Too many examples to list here. But she's a narcissist, self centred, rude fucking person and I feel so much better writing it down here.

Yep. Hence my username. My mother could suck the joy out of a carnival. Critical of everything and everyone. Always has a negative remark to counter any positivity or good news.
My Dad died 3 years ago. On his flowers I wrote You’re free now’ I didn’t mean from illness, I meant from her. Over 50 odd years she ground him down and emotionally bullied him.
I’m very LC with her. Awful woman.

sunshine, I guess it's just that we can't know, we can't compare?

Like you I'm concerned about how I'll feel afterwards.

Thank you tobeforgotten. it's so obvious now you've said that I feel embarrassed. I've felt I wanted to know the answer for so long it's clearly something that bothers me and I feel it would help to know.

I've mixed feelings as I stopped thinking I'd be worried about unfinished business if she died but then flipped back to worrying.

I wonder if looking into co-dependency might help if you are worried about how you’ll cope with a narc-parents death in the future and/or letting go of the relationship.

Going back to a narc parent Hoping this time they might give us the love or support we crave is like an addiction.

Personally, by letting go of any expectations that they might change and be nice, or that they will ever have a eureka moment and realise what utter shitty shitheads they have been my entire life, I’ve cut the emotional cord. They can give me nothing I need (love, support etc) so I look elsewhere and cherish the relationships that make me feel better and loved. If they ever change, bonus, if not, I’ve got on and lived my life in the meantime without any more of their poison.

wise words Craic

If that was to me, Craic, I am most definitely not codependent in my mother. I'm assuming you've not read my posts. Still agree with a pp though, good post in parts.

my mum is a piece of shit and so controlling. i hate her so much, she has a dumbass mind, i hate her so much. i hope my dad leaves her

Oh god this didn't age well , she died a week after I gave birth

Mine isn't but did get her own way a lot! When Dad wanted a new car, he wanted a yellow one. He was not 'allowed' because they were 'common'. Not as 'common' as the white car she made him get. I had great joy pointing out every white car on the road and the very occasional yellow car "Not many of these eh, Dad?"

When he died she said she wanted to get a rose bush in memory of him. Like me, my Dad loathed roses. Oh well....

bless you.