Advice Clinic - Slatterns welcome

[pineapplebryanbrown]

Do you have problems? Is your life truly ridiculous, are you ridiculous? Please step inside our fully staffed advice clinic and we will cure all your ills. We have a clap nurse standing by for more intimate problems, don't be shy.

I think people with bipolar who behave the way he is give other people with it a bad name. I had an auntie who had it and she was one of the lovliest women you could ever meet (bar the fact that she was high as a kite on medication that didn't suit her but this was 20 odd years ago in rural Ireland, she was very misunderstood). Having bipolar does not make you a horrible person. You are either a dick or you are not, and hes a dick. Block his number, you don't need any contact from someone like that.

You bastards have made me post on AIBU. I’m in the bath as well and the stupid pop up waste leaks a bit, so I hope I don’t dissolve into a puddle of faith in humanity.

General consensus is that he's an arse then.

Katerina thislido :) oh ha you went over to AIBU!! Scrub skin well to recover from the experience

for you Frown.
I'll also echo the others, in saying that you would probably be much better off going no contact with him. You may be fond of him, but it doesn't sound like it's a very healthy dynamic with him sending you bizarre messages which affect you negatively.

Frown
So sorry about your little girl.
Although it's bittersweet I hope you gain comfort from seeing her in your dreams

TL was it the fat/thin/seats/theatre thread or has some other thread in AIBU (why do I say elbow in my head when I read that?) had the benefit of your stellar wisdom?

Btw the mash was fab!

I'm sorry about your little girl Frown you can have a hug from me and I'll keep it clean (this time).

Have we discovered that all our effluvia is holy water? Or is it all a sign of Santa Danglia converging a blessing upon us? Are all blessings jizz? I sing Santa Danglia a la Santa Lucia each time in a sombre and atonal manner.

Lone I agree re mental health conditions, not all people with them are bastards. Bastards are bastards, ill are ill.

I used to know someone with EUPD and assumed that's why she was an utter cunt but have since met some nice people with it. Although it's a very tricky PD.

We'll need a new thread probably tomorrow and I think I need to standardise the thread title as we lose people sometimes.

What do you think of - Thigh's Advice Clinic - All Welcome

Dull, but.....? Welcoming I suppose.

Pooter my neighbour (retired, no disgusting cheery children) gave me a bag of cooking apples. If I make a crumble do I cook the apples before putting crumble topping on?

What accent do I have I your heads? Booming and powerful I hope, like God.

DT do you say "EE, well I'll go tut top of our sters"?

thigh it utterly HAS to be 'Saint machete's advice clinic. Leave your weapons at the front door'

Yes your accent is Godly Thigh if I only knew what God's accent was like I'd definitely know what yours is.

Em no Thigh I haven't ever said that but I think an old lady said to my mum when I was s child!

Not all blessings come across in jizz, we also have the mediums of piss and shit at play.

Oh I do love being a holy deity, I think this might be the best thing you've had me do!

Oh yes the thread title! I think it's wise to mention that we have the pox just in case they haven't had it yet!

Thigh, i know you didn't ask me about the crumble, but I don't precook my apples. Just peel, core and slice into chunks (not too thinly). Then into the dish, add crumble topping, cook for about 45 mins. They're all cooked and soft, but not watery, (which happens if i precook them first).

Sure DT dons a flat cap (and nowt else) and says "wye eye mon, eggy thump" whilst shooting out alternate whippets and rugby balls from her nether regions.

How about 'St Danglia at Thighs. All your prayers answered (probably)'

I haven't got a welsh accent, i may live here, but i haven't succumbed. Although i do occasionally say "I'll do it now, in a minute" but i say it ironically, although my irony is wasted on my family.

Religion, sex & Apple pie. All the makings of a great movie/book!

Dog thank you re crumble, I will be able to have that for breakfast now.

Cat yes I think you're right, plus a rousing rendition of "On Ilkley Moor Bar t'hat"

Dog do you say "by yere" and "sattin* with a very long pause on the T?

Ok so St Dangly clinic, Saint of machetes and pox. Run by thigh in collaboration with lover thislido

Yeah that'd bring the hoardes in. Though you can't claim to have a clap saint as that's been done already by St Fiacre or whatever the bastard was called

He shoulda stuck to gardening and lepers

Well I'm no better than I ought to be so I'll get off me legs and sup a brew then I'm goin down't chippy!

Are ye right or wot? Give us a fag Maxine, I'm gaspin!

Ahem, TL is not my lover, she's my best friend. Naked is my wife and DT is my right hand whore. Proj is our benefactor.