Advice Clinic - Slatterns welcome

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Do you have problems? Is your life truly ridiculous, are you ridiculous? Please step inside our fully staffed advice clinic and we will cure all your ills. We have a clap nurse standing by for more intimate problems, don't be shy.

That's really bad naked, if he isn't coming back they should bloody pay you now!

Yep to the not actually moving forward....

2nd year metabolism...sounds fun...I mean it will mostly be about eating different foods and using a stop clock to see how long it is before I want more chocolate right?

Re supplies in Bled. Yes, we have a chute that goes directly into our own supermarket under our castle. Now we have choices re the supermarket - we hire staff (people who aren't us), we man it ourselves on a rota (obligation) or nobody works there but if you're a bit bored or fancy looking through packages it would be handy if you popped stuff in the fridge.

I'm happy to line up make up and bubble bath

Transport - there are vehicles that are a hybrid of rowing boat / sampan / gondola staffed by old, yet strong, men who row you back and forth. Lake not brackish, suitable for swimming and drinking.

Don't think the thread knew what hit 'em

How about staffing it with friendly assistance dogs. I know they may not do the best job and may eat a lot of the sausages and cake but on the plus side they are super cute and would give you a warm welcome when you visited the store.

teacake that is a lovely idea but maybe some of them could be trained to do small deliveries? I'm envisaging little baskets, or barrels like St Bernard dogs have?

The theatre thread is dead, Jim.

How on earth has the fat thread gone on so bloody long

Thank you all for killing that thread it was a mercy killing I tell you!

Oooh can I order a St Bernards right now? I'd love a restorative brandy and a friendly pooch. Who knows, it might even do the housework

The fat thread is mostly us lot going wild. Yes to supermarket assistance dogs.

Not a bubble bath though, can't stand them

Yes the dogs can be trained to do chores. Here is a picture of how my dog has decorated the floor in an interesting way preventing the need to Hoover. She is now having a well deserved nap.

Well, Teacake...she's certainly put some artistic effort into it

Mine would help but he fancies a kip first

I'm back ffs. I think I'm a whole thread behind, ffs. Arse. I will catch up and update. Concise bit unable to manage tiny realm because not our great 'Thigh'.

thigh. Ok. I'll be patient but when he wakes up he needs to do the vacuuming at 'tea*'s first then deliver my keg.

Deal? It will keep him trim enough to fit into a theatre seat.

cat think new realm is being eyed up on top of a clifftop.

And there was a theatre fat thread in AIBU...

Exactly hoovering now would be like scrubbing off a Banksy I call it The remains of the Duck.

MrsCat come and back us up on the Fat Thread it's ridiculous! I said to myself I wasn't going to post on it again but the poster who completely missed Thigh's irony tipped me over the edge.

I still haven't seen the plane thread!

Oh DT not a plane thread, I can't bear it, or bare it.

I have just read my meters

This is not as simple as it seems. It is on the fucking floor of my under the stairs cupboard under 3 hoovers, 2 mops, 25 coats and spare laminate flooring.

Cat you're back! Are you missing Florida already?

Is it fair of us to be thread killers? We can't help it really, we are murderers after all, we try our best. Well we don't, ever, but that's what we'll say if questioned.

DT 4 part murder doc on UK TV play called Cold Valley is vg.