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Original poster

Is Your Life Shit? I can solve all your problems

999 replies

pineapplebryanbrown · 01/04/2019 19:07

I am a kindly non medically trained self appointed internet nurse. I am unfettered by knowledge or training and I run a lovely advice clinic. Please bring me your problems and I will solve them, forever.

OP posts:
Thread gallery
18
Original poster
pineapplebryanbrown · 03/04/2019 22:22

Oh Naked my poor dear bride, you shouldn't have to see such aspersions cast upon your profession.

OP posts:
DanglyTassles · 03/04/2019 22:22

naked may I interestyou in a pint of Winka! It is good for you at these times! (and all other times)

Don't worry though, we are having the offending cock (plural) slaughtered as you describe.

CarolinePooter · 03/04/2019 22:24

thigh my Dad always used to say that to us re doing the washing up. (ex navy!)

DanglyTassles · 03/04/2019 22:25

Pooter did he say naked my poor dear bride?

nakedscientist · 03/04/2019 22:38

Jengur LipstickHandbagCoffee

We need these superstars in Thighland.

Come to ussssssssssssss

nakedscientist · 03/04/2019 22:44

Thigh we need to be together soon.

I can feel a storm brewing

(or could be last night's curried monster munch)

DanglyTassles · 03/04/2019 22:50

Ok so I just had another try but ended up murdering my phone on their thread!

It really needed telling tho! Hmm

Original poster
pineapplebryanbrown · 03/04/2019 22:58

Pooter mine too, also re washing up and gardening.

OP posts:
ifyoulikepinacolada · 03/04/2019 22:58

Hi thisciples, is there any gin going? I’ve just managed to send my bank statements and records to the accountant within a day of her requesting them and I’ve come over all funny now...

BloodsportForAll · 03/04/2019 23:03

@ProjectGainsborough they dug my wisdom tooth out. Impacted. Spent a month with one side of my face like a hamsters cheek when full.

DanglyTassles · 03/04/2019 23:05

Hello pina welcome!

Here have a lovely pint of gin to celebrate! I can add some wine to it if you like and someone will be along with a dash of vodka. That is then a pint of Winka!

I digress! I'm glad you don't have a problem for us and come to us from an accomplished place! Cheers!

Spongeface · 03/04/2019 23:25

Feeling the urge to delurk (have lurked since the start and been trying to think of problems for thighland to solve was every other question ;) but I don't have all of your energy and wit to contribute. I am vv good at naps, lying down and drinking of the wodka and eating of the snax. I have many blankets and rarely get up to piss. Can I come in? I have followed lots of the advice and feel this is a true land.

PettyLaBelle · 03/04/2019 23:35

M3 I’m going to do murdering. Fuckers.

DanglyTassles · 03/04/2019 23:37

Of course you can Spongeface ! Welcome to the world of no movement!

Original poster
pineapplebryanbrown · 03/04/2019 23:40

sponge and pina don't feel obliged to have problems, if you are already feeling your Inner Thigh that's perfect. Continue resting, after that have a lovely nap and a snack.

OP posts:
Original poster
pineapplebryanbrown · 03/04/2019 23:42

Reg that's the spirit! Can I come with you? Who are we murdering, is there a reason?

OP posts:
Spongeface · 03/04/2019 23:46

Thanks DT and Thigh that's great news. I will celebrate with a nap I think. But I think I need snax first. Couple of wispas should do.

DanglyTassles · 04/04/2019 07:08

thigh the people who work instead of pretend and skive off in Thighland have been subject to offensive attitudes of sexist menz.

We have promised termination of said menz as they cannot be allowed to carry on offending thisters!

I nearly did it but I had a nap instead!

DanglyTassles · 04/04/2019 07:16

Also thigh I have to confess, you know how it's Thursday and normally I perform as 'Auld Bag' at the labour club on the corner?

Well I have been requested to take my rugby ball trick on the road for a Peter Stringfellow memorial tour!

Well you know how fond I was If is Stringy when I performed in ''fetish corner' of Stringfellows back in the day so I agreed.

I'm getting on the tour bus in half an hour but will be in touch as and when I can.

I hope we'll have wifi ! Or Thighfi at our various seedy destinations!

DanglyTassles · 04/04/2019 07:28
  • of old Stringy
PettyLaBelle · 04/04/2019 07:39

Yes Thigh we are murdering M3’s ‘colleagues’. And we are dressing up as barmaids to do it.

I haven’t got cerise paper but I can probably draw a Bumtip.

DogHairEverywhere · 04/04/2019 07:45

Dangly looks like your phone has caught my phone's autoshite disease. I'm torn between severe chastisement for it, which it may not survive, (and then, how will I get my 'Thigh-Fix'?), Or a more gentle approach. What should I do?

DogHairEverywhere · 04/04/2019 07:45

Perhaps I could use my phone as the murder weapon?

SummerHouse · 04/04/2019 07:56

How many menz are we talking? I have confiscated the pointy coat from the love spells thread. That will do one, if not two.

ProjectGainsborough · 04/04/2019 07:59

Welcome everyone!

Bloodsport how disappointing, you must lie down and rest. Next time you need my old dentist, who said it was her favourite thing to do and would come at you cheerfully waving a little silver hammer. It never hurt.

Haven’t seen her for a while though, so perhaps she retired / got struck off.