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Original poster

I want a cat, but how do I make sure I get one that’s not an arsehole?

249 replies

GottaGetUp · 30/03/2019 20:49

One that will be friendly and sit on my lap and purr, and not just hit my face at 5am for breakfast and then fuck off out until it gets hungry again?

Or are they all arseholes who let you pet them just often enough that you’ll keep feeding them?

OP posts:

Thread gallery

Wolfiefan · 30/03/2019 21:13

All kittens are arseholes. Don’t get a kitten.
An older cat will be a more known entity. I volunteer at a shelter. I was bitten and scratched by a couple last week. I also had one young boy cat wrap his two front paws round me to hug me and buried his head in my armpit to get even closer!!!!
Not an oriental. Siamese and Burmese et al are their own very special type of arsehole!

Longdistance · 30/03/2019 21:14

I think it’s the luck of the draw tbh.
My cat never brought home ‘presents’ for me. He never went on furniture or my lap or work surfaces.
We hand reared him from early on, so he wasn’t your typical cat 🐈

DailyMailSucksWails · 30/03/2019 21:14

You WANT to be a cat slave, OP. Give into it.
Resistance is Futile.

I want a cat, but how do I make sure I get one that’s not an arsehole?

Interested in this thread?

Then you might like threads about this subject:

Cats

CigarsofthePharoahs · 30/03/2019 21:15

My cat is an arsehole.
She's also a fluffy soppy puss who will sit on my lap and purr.
Then go back to being an arsehole.

Passmethecrisps · 30/03/2019 21:15

Oh nova that was what our wee pet of a cat used to do. She would lie there with such complete contentment and trust it was lovely. When I got pregnant, I would rest her on my bump a bit. She never did it again after baby was born but she was always a big sook

gubbsywubbsy · 30/03/2019 21:15

Get a rescue adult cat , kittens are always cuddly but change when they get older. I have two bengals and one is super friendly like a dog and one is out all day and quite aloof .. no difference in anything , just the way they are I guess. Plus they will be soo grateful they may like you more 🙏🏻🙏🏻

Original poster

GottaGetUp · 30/03/2019 21:18

Heh, the thread is making me smile, and want a cat even more, even with the (almost) unanimous arsehole verdict.

Older rescue cat sounds good, we were thinking rescue anyway, but wasn’t sure about kitten vs adult cat.

OP posts:

GassyAss · 30/03/2019 21:18

All cats are arseholes. That’s the best thing about having cats.
They do slow down with age but a lap cat is not guaranteed. TBH if you want a cat that’s not a bit random and a bit of a sod, you probably want a dog.

Sigh81 · 30/03/2019 21:18

Go for an older cat. Mine is snuggly, relaxed, purrs all the time and follows me around so he can bury himself in the crook of my neck or groom me. Even if he's not physically on me (lap or shoulder), he is usually stretching out a little paw to touch me/make absolutely sure he's aware when I get up to get him some food.

He also sleeps through the night, thank goodness. Oh, and runs up to the door to greet us!

Older cats all the way for me.

MitziK · 30/03/2019 21:18

This is the only way.

I have one that adores being cuddled, will sit against my foot or side rather than clamber all over me and has never lifted so much as a single claw against me.

He's a fucking dickhead.

Yesterday, he landed in my dinner. Didn't mean to (he was trying to steal DP's), but he landed headfirst into mine.

Today, he has followed me into the bathroom and, rather than just talk to me about his morning (ie, prior to 7am), he has decided at the age of 8 that now is the perfect time to start murdering the last toilet roll. He then hid under the towel and started pouncing on my feet whilst I was in mid-pee.

He then wandered into the back garden and laid down amongst the potatoes, came back and needed a three hour sleep to recover from his one hour sleep.

He's now wandering about, wailing at DP because, well - he can.

He's disabled, doesn't leave the garden, can't scratch his ear without falling over and is eternally happy.

But he's still a fucking TwatCat.

MrsStock · 30/03/2019 21:19

Look for a friendly breed. We had a Bengal cross who had the loveliest temperament and was really cuddly.

Woolly17 · 30/03/2019 21:20

I have two rescue cats as kittens - and they were semi feral. They are (after 4 years) lap cats. They are also idiots. And they bring us mice. Sigh.
Get an older cat they stop completely impossible after about 5yrs or so.

OrangeSamphire · 30/03/2019 21:20

If you’re thinking of pedigrees, rag dolls are pretty amenable.

My two are part rag doll part Bengal. They are cuddle cats and really placid but also funny and love to go to the beach at the bottom of the garden.

We previously had two silver spotty British Shorthair pedigrees. They were absolutely hilarious. Full of personality. Ruled the roost. But definitely not lap cats.

QuestionableMouse · 30/03/2019 21:21

Get a ragdoll. Sister has one that's part ragdoll and if you sit down you end up with a cat climbing all over you purring.

QueenOfThorns · 30/03/2019 21:21

Yes, they’re all arseholes! But some are lap cats and some will never be. We got ours as older (about 9 months) kittens from a charity that fostered them in people’s homes, so they were able to give us a very good idea of their personalities. (They’d never been outside though, so we had no warning about how prolific their serial killing activities would be )

Gottalovesummer · 30/03/2019 21:23

Well my cat wakes me up in the night FAR more than my kids ever did.

If my alarm goes off and she's still asleep on my bed, that's a victory.

But I love her more than I can say!

Get a cat!

Wolfiefan · 30/03/2019 21:24

We had rescued young adults.
When we eventually lost them we got kittens. I am NEVER fucking having kittens EVER again. They were really bloody hard work. From bouncing off the walls at midnight to doing the wall of death at the crack of bloody dawn. To getting IN the sodding sofa and trying to murder each other. Trying to get up the chimney, under the dishwasher or in the fucking washing machine.
I love them. But they are complete bastards. They hate each other. One is a bitey cow who antagonises her sister and winds up the dog.
An adult is a much better idea if you’re looking for something further down the bastardcatscale.

squee123 · 30/03/2019 21:24

go to your local cat sanctuary and tell them that you don't care what it looks like or how old it is as long as it is a lap cat that will be happy to be fussed. They will be expert at reading cats so you'll have what you want, and most likely will be giving a home to a cat that may well have been overlooked for being the wrong age or colour :)

Passmethecrisps · 30/03/2019 21:24

That’s funny about the kittens vs cats debate.

Our first was a cat. She so wanted to be cared for and had a hard life

Our currents were born in the SSPCA to a feral mum. They were proving impossible to tame and were weeks away from going on the farm cat list. The SSPCA were very confident that kittens were the way to go for us but we had an 8 week old and a 4 year old when we took them on. I am not quite sure what I was thinking really

The wee girl used to climb onto my neck and paddle away while I was feeding the baby. I was the only one who could touch them at all for ages. I reckon it was the Mum thing

troppibambini · 30/03/2019 21:26

Don't get one like mine she is the biggest fucking arse hole going.
She meows constantly til I sit down with her
She's a fussy cow with food
If she's not happy with you she pukes a furball on the carpet
She catches mice and eats the body and always leaves the head at the bottom of the stairs so you stand on it with bare feet
She sits on clean washing and leaves fur all over it (never sits on dirty washing)
She terrorises our old staffy who is soft as butter and cry's when bitchcat swipes at her nose because she dare to walk past her.
Pic attached to show how evil she is

Passmethecrisps · 30/03/2019 21:27

Oh! And I have an ace story!

My 4 year old fell for an older boy cat who had feline HIV. He was fit and healthy and DESPERATE for a home but he would need a lifetime of care and would never be allowed to be outside because of the risk of infection.

We live on the edge of proper rural land so it would be awful to keep him in so we said no.

While we were there collecting ours though a lady picked him and it was magnificent. All the staff hugged her and then high fived each other when she went to get her carrier.

An older cat could be so rewarding

BlackHillsofDakota · 30/03/2019 21:27

We have four cats, of them only one will sit on my lap, two will sit near me and one will not come anywhere close

troppibambini · 30/03/2019 21:27

Oh and she's pissed off now because I switched the big light on to take a photo and woke her up.

Spartak · 30/03/2019 21:27

I got a 15 year old rescue who was in danger of being PTS. She bit me when I met her, but I took her home anyway.
I did what they advised and kept her in one room, and slowly introduced myself. Within 10 minutes she was on my lap and that's where she sat every evening, for the three years that she lived for. I tried letting her sleep in my bed but the only place she would settle was lying on my chest so she had a blanket right outside my room.

She's been gone for almost a year now, she fell asleep in my arms and didn't wake up. I still miss her everyday. I've considered getting another cat but it feels like I'm being unfaithful even thinking about it.

donajimena · 30/03/2019 21:32

If I get another Cat it will be a ragdoll. They are a bit more high maintenance than your usual moggy and are indoor (or expensive run) cats. They love attention and fuss and will seek out affection.

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