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Original poster

I can solve all your problems, forever

999 replies

pineapplebryanbrown · 27/03/2019 20:41

I'm a self appointed non medically trained kindly interested nurse. I am unfettered by knowledge or training and welcome you to my advice clinic.

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Thread gallery
8
Hellenbackagen · 27/03/2019 22:57

Thigh.

I'm in a relationship . It's
Shite. We go to Mexico soon. Should I kill him and throw his body in the sea and say a cartel did it? He keeps threatening me with a terrible crocodile accident .....it's me
Or him.

Smartieshavetheanswer · 27/03/2019 22:57

Getting I quite like your version of my name.

As well as that, I read "to write their own guff" instead of "stuff" which I fear is by far the most accurate.

Hellenbackagen · 27/03/2019 22:59

Btw....I won't tell Mexican police we ago back 3 Fred's

Yetanothernamechange1234 · 27/03/2019 23:01

Why does my anxiety make me terrified of my parents and makes me physically hurt after I’ve had to see my mum?

Gettingnowhere · 27/03/2019 23:01

Hellen Are you still with Mr Birthday Card?

Hellenbackagen · 27/03/2019 23:07

I think I might be....

Gettingnowhere · 27/03/2019 23:08

Yetanother Here in Thighland we specialise in solving problems by writing utter rubbish. Do your parents dress up as zombies, vampires or similar when you visit them? Is that why you're terrified? Do you visit them on full moons?

Laughing despite your fears is a valuable skill to learn. We do a lot of laughing in this crazy place. Welcome to Thighland

HappybutsometimesGrouchy · 27/03/2019 23:10

Should I get up early and make a nice healthy breakfast or let my husband cook something quick, greasy and delicious while I sleep in?

Gettingnowhere · 27/03/2019 23:13

Alpacawhoeveryouarenow Do we still have dishwashers in Thighland? I thought we were just eating Monster Munch off the floor these days

Gettingnowhere · 27/03/2019 23:16

Happy can your husband cook all of us something quick, greasy and delicious while he's at it? Is he quick, greasy and delicious?

HappybutsometimesGrouchy · 27/03/2019 23:21

Nah, he's rather salty [grim] but does cook a mean waffle

HappybutsometimesGrouchy · 27/03/2019 23:22

Ha! Meant to put grin, not grim. But both are accurate 😁

Yetanothernamechange1234 · 27/03/2019 23:24

Oops sorry I didn’t read more than title before I posted.

Kleptronic · 27/03/2019 23:41

Not to worry Yetanothernamechange1234, it's your parents/mother causing a stress response in you which results in those feelings. Clearly it is a relationship with many negative effects for you. Consider going no contact, and finding counselling. There is also a very helpful thread on Mumsnet called 'But we took you to stately homes' where there are many knowledgable and helpful people who have experienced difficult and toxic familial relationships, and they can probably help you to discuss this issue, and/or signpost useful resources.

ProjectGainsborough · 28/03/2019 06:45

Yetanother it’s a comedy thread, but focussed on NOT doing things we don’t like. Your body is saying you don’t like seeing your mum.

Your body is very wise. Do less of things that cause you pain and maybe as klept says find counsellor to talk it through with Flowers

ProjectGainsborough · 28/03/2019 06:49

Hellen book a boat trip in Mexico. I’m thinking The Talented Mr Ripley.

Happy I think you know the answer to that one already. I hope you’re in bed.

Where is shin? I am still intrigued.

Gettingnowhere · 28/03/2019 06:54

Hellen How's Trump getting on with that wall? Can you leave your "man" on the other side of it

DogHairEverywhere · 28/03/2019 07:34

I have a very busy day ahead of me, should I stop MNing now and crack on, or spend just a few more minutes fannying about on here, and then have to rush around like a mad thing?

ProjectGainsborough · 28/03/2019 07:37

Dog option 2 every time. Doing the same as we speak.

Eastie77 · 28/03/2019 07:53

+1 for option 2 Dog. I need to leave for school run in about 20mins. No idea where DD's PE kit is though. Obviously MN is going to help me find it which is why I'm on here instead of looking for it.

Gettingnowhere · 28/03/2019 08:07

Eastie we've dealt with schools before. They give you stuff like "library books" and expect them back. The fools. It worries me that the type of person who thinks I can remember library day is also educating my child.

Send her in pyjamas and say you thought it was Dress Down Day.

DanglyTassles · 28/03/2019 08:07

thigh don't worry about marrying two people because Jedward are planning your wedding so that balances that!

Getting I missed you so much! I thought you fell down a hole in Oz and I cried with snot!

Original poster
pineapplebryanbrown · 28/03/2019 08:09

Eastie pack a sharpie. It's time your children learned to colour themselves in if they can't find their clothes. The filthy little animals.

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DogHairEverywhere · 28/03/2019 08:11

Great advice, sinks back into slanket for a few more minutes,..

Original poster
pineapplebryanbrown · 28/03/2019 08:12

Project when you said "this is a comedy thread" what did you mean? I live every second of this, don't you? You should.

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