Men on a post natal ward

[RogueV]

The guy in the next bay is pissing me right off.
He just asked the midwife for a bed. Dick.

Why are they allowed to stay anyway? Shouldn’t they be going home?

Sorry just ranting.

He’s a disgrace because he wouldn’t allow his partner - who’d just had a haemorrhage and placental abruption - the space to rest properly. Hospital beds are not designed for 2 adults.

It doesn’t matter if she said she was ok with it, any decent man would never do that.

So his partner has no agency and can't decide for herself what she wants to do post birth?

It doesn’t matter if she said she was ok with it, any decent man would never do that

That’s up to her to decide, not you

I am surprised the HCPs didn't tell him to get out.

No I'm not. I'm pointing out that you can't assume that everyone who has difficult births and difficult recoveries supports partners being present 24/7. I have said on this thread that there are differing viewpoints that completely conflict with each other, resulting in a situation where one group will inevitably lose out to the other. The only approach is to push for change that means both groups are catered for. Private rooms or two wards. There's no point endlessly arguing about who is "right" or who should get priority. Both viewpoints need catering for.

It's up to a woman to decide what she is ok with surely? Why is it up to other women to decide that she can't make her own decisions?

Like I said, no decent man would squeeze into his partner’s single hospital bed a mere 5 hours after she’d haemorrhaged. It’s not a question of agency, it’s a question of decency.

Yeah I'm not impressed with other women deciding for me what I want to do post birth.

Both viewpoints need catering for.

I agree entirely with this

Why not? What exactly is going to happen if they share a bed?

And I’m also surprised he wasn’t booted out - he certainly should have been.

I am surprised the HCPs didn't tell him to get out.

Me too. It's not safe, an infection risk and would surely have obstructed hcp observations overnight.

@LadyGregorysToothbrush

If she’s happy, it’s nothing whatever to do with you.

One of them might fall out for a start. Those beds are tiny.

^ what Raspberry said. Not to mention giving your partner space to rest properly instead of squishing two adults into a single bed.

There's no way you could fall out without waking up hanging off the bed first.

My DH and I pushed his reclining chair and my bed together to make a makeshift double bed. No one complained

Space to rest properly lmao. As if it makes any difference to the woubd whether your husband is lying next to you or not.

I was so hot that first night, I was still losing a lot of blood so was sleeping on one of those pad things and was feeling very sore. The thought of DH squished in with me on the rustly sheets breathing all over me and making me even hotter is awful.
Not that he would have wanted to even if he could.

I have just told him what he missed out on. He was

That's you though. Why are you not able to realise that other women would be comforted by their husband with them?

Not that he would have wanted to even if he could.

Why? That's quite sad.

Ironic and mind boggling that the one poster who insists she can't comprehend valid concerns and feelings other women have in the presence of men whilst at their most vulnerable, has an irrational fear and mistrust of medical professionals and holds some very unusual beliefs. You couldn't make it up! Yet I'm sure she fully expects everyone to empathise with her. Even after giving the most cold response ever to a rape survivor's post and of course making it all about her- again.

And yes, if any staff would've seen PP's partner sharing a bed with her, the patient, he would've been told to leave. What an awful man. It's all about the menz here. Strange thread.

Not sad at all. Normal really.

I hope OP is ok anyway.