Flowers for Christmas from new boyfriend.

[seriouslypanicking]

What would you think if you got a bunch of flowers from someone you’ve been dating for a year.

My oh just gave me flowers from the internetthey arrived today but the way he’s been messaging me the past week leaving me clues and made it appear I was getting Crown Jewels or something a bit more than flowers.

I’m well aware I appear like a spoilt brat but he’s going away to his family today so I know that’s all he’s bothered to get me. Whereas I spent quite a bit of time and thought on his present. Feeling a bit deflated to be honest.

I can almost feel the grow up comments coming in already as I type this and I’d say the same, but this guy is now sulking because I apparently didn’t congratulate him on his really thoughtful gift enough so now I’m somehow in the doghouse.

For further info I received them alone and opened them up straight away put them in a vase and sent a photo thanking him to say there were lovely.

1. that’s a shit gift.
2. red flag re his sulking.

I've never even heard of getting flowers for Christmas. Christmas is for presents not flowers. I'd be disappointed too.

I'm with Kath & Kim when it comes to flowers - disappointing gift, fine for thank you's and congratulations on new baby / job / house.

But some men are just plain poor at gift ideas, so from that perspective you could give him the benefit of the doubt. If you go down this route, just mention that although the flowers were lovely, they are such a fleeting gift and a plants would be nicer as they last longer....and they are an unusual Christmas gift....

However the sulking is not on. Are you sure he's sulking ? You mentioned he was travelling to his family - is it possible there's radio silence as he hasn't got a signal.

These are the flowers I got.
He ordered them over the internet with a free box of chocolates.

Sorry my fault I still think of him as newish to Christmas but we’ve been together nearly a year in jan. I thanked him straight away for the flowers, said they were lovely and well done on remembering I love tulips.

Since then he’s stayed silent with me answering in short messages when I text him, I asked what was up and I got some excuse about him not feeling well because he’s drunk too much.

I left it a while then said listen I know something is up and I get the impression your pissed off because I haven’t thanked you in the way you imagined whatever that was. He replied “good job, you sure know how to make me feel special”

I’m truly stumped on this one. And no there is nothing else, he’s gone back to see his family in America so won’t see him till the 1st week of jan which is why we did gifts this week. There’s nothing in there other than a small printed card that came with the flowers too.

I’m happy that a lot of other people see my point though about just flowers being a bit meh!

I should add he’s 5 hours behind so I didn’t get a reply straight away. I called twice and both time got ignored.
He later replied he was just asleep and has made no effort to call me back.

Obviously I’m not going to say anything about them other than there lovely and Thankyou for taking the time to find the ones I love.

I'd be happy with flowers rather than more stuff

And I've been with my husband 15 years

I don't do Christmas gifts for adults and haven't for decades - I state that so when I say that I say that those flowers are underwhelming , there's some context.

So he’s sulking because you didn’t make him feel special for giving you flowers?

What was your gift to him?

They look lovely but that is probably because of the vase. It’s ok as a gift I think, now that I have seen them.

No offense but that's one pretty shitty bunch of festively tarted up petrol station flowers you got there 😂. Flowers are a shite present, free chocolates are a shite present, sulking before he leaves until January because you didn't lavish him with a thousand thank you's, fuck that, new year, new start, new boyfriend

Those flowers are very nice, but not what I'd want for an Xmas present.
I hope you got him something that only last a week too.

A whole year into a relationship, I would say a cheap bunch of flowers for Christmas and a bad reaction to your 'insufficient' gratitude are... indicative of fairly key beliefs and values.

How do you feel about this dude generally, OP?

Shit gift. Hard work boyfriend. You can do better.

Honestly life is too short and your relationship too young.

Rubbish present. And they look cheap too.

My DP brought me some tulips back from Waitrose with dinner the other evening, just because. I must admit I’d be a bit disappointed if he’d been bigging them up as my Xmas gift beforehand. They’re pretty and all, but more of a gesture than a gift. If they’d been super expensive roses like the Photo above, maybe they could qualify as an amazing gift, but £8 worth of tulips is ‘nice’ at best. I think you were over egging it with ‘lovely’ tbh!! But then I’m clearly an ungrateful cow too.

My husband has only ever bought me flowers for Christmas, always a beautiful bunch and with my favourite flowers in. I don't get him anything and instead we go for a day out to Christmas market and food.

BTW I WAS suitably grateful for mine because they were unexpected and didn’t come with any expectation. As random Wednesday flowers they’re the most thoughtful thing. As your only Xmas gift, nah.

Glm that sounds nice and it’s something you’re both agreed on. Presumably he doesn’t say “oooh you’re going to be really excited about the amazing gift I’ve got you!” in the weeks leading up to it?!

The sulking because you haven’t said Thankyou ‘in the right way’ is a red flag OP, especially after all the build up. The gift wasn’t about you at all, it was all about him and now he’s having you creep around him giving him lots of attention.

For the purpose of the question, I’d not be happy with those as a Christmas gift from my DH. If I get presents I like them to be well thought about or I’d prefer nothing at all. An amazing bunch of flowers from a favourite shop, with my most favourite flowers and a thoughtful card and bottle of champagne, yes. Those flowers, no.

I like flowers as a gift, but those look like the sort of thing you’d buy Grandma if you couldn’t think of anything else. Fir cones on a stick...

Nice flowers, but not a Christmas present for a nearly year long relationship.
He sounds very immature.

I’d be disappointed too. What company sent them? Can you check to see how much they were?
What did you get him?

I checked the box and the company is online they cost £38 believe it or not. Definitely overpriced but I can appreciate he’s took the time to look for tulips as he knows I love them. But there the type of flowers I buy through summer when doing a weekly shop in Aldi.

For reference his present was a pair of Barbour slippers, so not cheap, plus a mini pack of whiskys he’s never tried along with some hotel chocolat and a card I searched for the. Thoughtfully wrote out to him about the past year.

As a surprise through the year he got me a handbag I’d mentioned in passing and the matching purse, I was genuinely shocked he’d remembered I had mentioned it at all. So to get this for Xmas from that it just felt a bit let down I guess. No biggie anyway, I’m having my family around me so will be over this, I agree though the sulking thing is giving me cause for concern. He’s stubborn sometimes but he always apologised if he needs to without me ever prompting him!

He's an arse OP. My STBXH started off with low effort gifts (when I always went to a lot of trouble and was very thoughtful), dramas about how I wasn't enthusiastic enough about his gifts/to see him, blah blah blah. You're going to get a lot more drama and sulks from this one, I really don't advise putting up with it

‘But there the type of flowers I buy through summer when doing a weekly shop in Aldi.’

And for a fiver!

But he probably doesn’t know that. I’d be annoyed he’d spent nearly £40 and you’ll have nothing to show for it in a week.