The worst nightclub you've ever been to?

[Xuli]

Ziggys, York c.1999. An old Regency townhouse that you would swear was still lived in. Sofas, scatter cushions, and chintz wallpaper on the walls - chintz wallpaper that actually started sweating by 10pm. The main dance floor was down in the basement with only one narrow staircase for access and which must have breached every single health and safety law known to man.

We only kept going because it was two WKD's for £1.50 on student night.

Not rtfs but klutz in Durham in the late 1990’s. Triple vodka red bull, tiny ladies toilets up impossibly steep stairs. Terrible music followed with cheesy chips from the chippy at the top of the road before sprinting for the night bus (or shite bus) to make it back to college. Ah, fond memories.

I did postgrad in York and can safely say that Ziggys remained terrible right up to about 2006 when it was turned into a gentleman’s club. Tofts was gropy and I held down a bar job for a few months in IKOn/DIVA and can confirm it’s not a place you wanted to see with the lights on.

Tinsel Angel yep the Razz/ Bkue Angel is still going and has been since the 69s apparently as I have an aunt who frequented it way back then.

I wonder if I am the only mumsnetter who ever went to Pemps in Wigan?

I used to go to Ziggy's! It was crap, but not as crap as Toffs!

Oh my life, so many shit clubs I’ve been to in this thread. I’m a York native, so Ziggys and Silks from about age 14 if you showed your tits to the bouncers who were all filthy perves I then had a stint in Durham, and a few trips you Klute, and then Bristol university in the late 90's for a round of Wedgies and Steam Rock

Happy happy memories

I'm pretty sure downstairs at Ziggy's had black artexing on the walls...

Dirty Den’s in Dundee which then morphed into Oscars, so was fondly called Dirty O’s. Was incredibly rough but frequented by bold university students who liked to walk on the wild side. Met my dh there

This thread is funny. Anyone else ever go to the roadhouse in covent garden? Before they relaxed the licensing laws I ended up there loads of times just because it was open late and central. Spectacularly naff with neon lights and other 80stastic decor (this was around the turn of the millennium), a band that played things like Build Me Up Buttercup and a load of bemused tourists who thought that this epitomised the famed London club scene they'd heard about.

@BoooForYou and @HowOftenDoYouClean I would say Amadangerous, Manor Club and I give you..:.. strawberry moons. I will not hear you say bad shit about the Oast House though. It was shit, but I had many happy memories with friends there!!

Whatamuddleduck I spent my late teens and 20s in Portsmouth and Plymouth and was just going to mention Jesters and Boobs. I had a loyalty card for the latter! It was hideous, with a dance floor that bounced if too many people were on it at once. Now sadly (!) gone, just like it's Portsmouth counterpart, Joanna's.

Glad to see Klute (the riverside?) in Durham featuring here, Several years of my life wasted there, followed, as someone has mentioned, by cheesy chips fromSaddlers. Happy days! 

A club in the town I grew up in, long closed down unsurprisingly as it was an absolute dive. Picnic benches instead of tables and chairs. The Coke came from room temperature 2L bottles, not on tap. They used the cheapest vodka. And the floors were so sticky your shoes would come off your feet.

Another vote for both Klute & Ziggys - happy days.

Rickys in leeds on 10p a pint indie night was grim. I was a Phono girl myself!

Anybody remember Spiders in Hull? A nightclub in the middle of a 1960s industrial estate.

Reverse door policy - if you looked too smart, they wouldn't let you in.

Shots were 40p, the whisky was pretty close to Jeyes Fluid.

Cocktails I think were £1.50 and came in a pint glass - Pink Pugsleys, Willy Worms, Brown Bombers, Pangalactic Gargleblasters.

There was a big projector screen playing 1970s porn films going all the time, and the music was out of this world - all alternative and goth stuff.

If you lost your balance and fell over into the fire doors, all the lights would come on and the music would stop.

At the end of the night we'd all spill out of the doors at once. Loads of pissed Goths queuing up for pattie butties from the chip wagon and trying to avoid each other's puke.

God, it was heaven. Best nights of my entire life. But classy...nope.

Nightclub just outside Reading - can’t remember the name in the late 90s.
Someone shat on the dance floor. A bouncer chatted me up by saying if anyone ever spat in my face he would hurt them. Someone offered my £50 to bend over in a short skirt. An extremely drunk man aggressively accused me of stealing his coat.

I was very young and sheltered before this!

Not a nightclub, but an entire town...
Aldershot before the paras were moved on.

My Mum was a very no nonsense barmaid and was offered a job in 5s (after army crawling the length of it to prove herself worthy) my Dad went fucking spare!
The stories are all the stuff of legend.
I only ever went to cheeks and that was an experience I'd rather forget!

I’m glad someone else mentioned Caesars in Streatham . There was also another Caesar’s on the Old Kent Road. Same premise - pay entry and then drink as much cheap booze as you can handle.

Inevitably by midnight there were girls vomiting in the loos abd at least one fight had broken out.

Classy times!

@mossyroundhill my home town too!!
Remember Credo's & Stillage too?

Granaries in Croydon springs to mind. Guaranteed within 5 minutes of entry to have some sleazebag pressing his groin into your backside .

MawkishTwaddle, I remember Spiders. I was a student at Hull Uni in the 90’s and it was the best! Loved the cocktails. Plus LA and Waterside (?) - 20p a pint!

@ClenchQueen roadhouse was lush. Covent Garden was the place to be back then. Was it the gardening club on the corner that had Nintendo machines in the walls???

Dorchester, Wolverhampton. Mainly because we were all underage and occasionally ran into our teachers.

Planet. Planet still exists but these days they're removed the toilet doors to stop people shagging.

We ended up in the Pink Flamingo (or whatever it was called then) for my hen night circa 1984...when a pub crawl was all that was needed for a hen.

I think it turned into Destiny and Elite...which my brother (and I suspect most of Derby) used to call Debbie and Eddies

Capisce in Mayfair was absolutely horrendous.

It was very tastefully decorated and had potential to be a great club, but it was so boring and had an awful atmosphere. Only 2 people were on the dance floor, and the rest just sat or stood posing all night, or strutting up and down pouting. They had a diamond raffle too. Apparently they had an incredibly valuable diamond that you could buy a raffle ticket at a ridiculous price to try and win.