Amusing typos you have commited/seen!

[ContessasGulagSpaDay]

I just tried to type 'acute bleeding' but somehow entered 'acute bellend' dying here, on my own, in my home office

It's been done before, but it's Friday and I'm in a good mood. Tell me of your typos!

I'm absolutely dying of laughter

“the Chief Officerection had the pleasure of...”

It’s missing a space and a capital S

Not just me, but on various baby boards Muslims have been used or suggested for many many uses, including wiping up and cleaning babies but also to be shoved down mummies front to mop up breast milk leaks. Muslins are of course what is meant but even typing this, I was auto corrected!!

I sent a text to the delivery man telling him he needs to ring me, but for some reason ring autocorrected to tickle!

I replied to an Indian colleague called Sayantan and Outlook autocorrected his name to Satanist
I wondered whether to ignore it but then I thought No and emailed a profuse apology.

Rusty bear that is brilliant! Is it still there? And while you're in boots you can grab a pack of Muslims to shove down your top. :o

Office party years ago was at a Chinese restaurant that also did karaoke. You could choose to croon that Neil Young classic
‘A whore with no name’, or even the Bee Gees ‘How deep is you love?’

I once sent an email which was meant to start Hello David!.
But I missed the o so greeted him
Hell David!

I remember a Mumsnet thread a while back where the OP thought that her boyfriend was going to propose that weekend. An excited Mumsnetter replied "Ooh! I hope he dies!" She meant DOES obviously.

That was probably me :o

Bad - are you, 'snapped and farted'?!

I invited someone to websex just this week!

(WebEx)

On a PowerPoint presentation for work, I thought I'd written about challenges we 'could face' but instead I wrote 'come face'

Luckily, I'd asked a colleague to check it over for me, and she spotted it thank god!

I accidentally texted my best friends df asking him to bring some ginger pubes (now don't ask me what I actually wanted him to bring mortification wiped that memory from my mind) unfortunately years later we are still good friends and he and his dw will never let me live this down

Talented pool of people to "talented poo"

I had a few Korres shower gels and wanted to ask if I should use guava, Santorini vine or fig first. Except Autocorrect thought I might prefer 'dog' shower gel. Fragrant.

'Terrible. I am lying on the sofa with a gun'. 😂😂😂

I can’t compete with these, though many moons ago as a medical secretary I did once diagnose someone in print with ‘complete lover failure’. I mean, we’ve all been there, right?

Things I have put in emails:
'arsing' instead of 'arising'
Suggesting that I 'poop' instead of 'pop' something in someones''s office
Apologising 'for any convenience caused'
'Pubic' instead of public.
Astonishingly I somehow manage to hold down a responsible job

@Wickedstepmum67

You absolutely can compete. 'Complete lover failure' is genius

Many, many years ago a friend wrote an essay on the decline of pubic libraries...

I was playing the Music WAG game on here & posted: The Ugly Duckling by Danny Kate. Only stupid autocorrect posted:

The Ugly Duck Lingerie

The mind boggles at that one.

I death an email to a modelling agency to arrange a before shot for one of their models but accidentally sent before shit

Oh FFS!! Sent not death!!!