Should have children been told of this incident by the school?

[Cashewsandhummus]

DC quite upset tonight. There was a serious incident at their school and the teacher told them about it. Y3. Nothing that we ever discussed in details, just that there are bad people.
I'd filter particularly gruesome and upsetting news so it's the first time DC heard about something like this.
Was the school right to notify the children before the parents? Should it be up to us to decide how and what we tell the children?
Now I have a sobbing child which never happened before.

and I’m happy to listed to dofferent views

No you are not. You are rude and belligerent because you asked a question and didn't get the answers you wanted.

Back to the question. That you asked...
The teacher acted appropriately. I'd be more concerned with your child's reaction which seems quite worrisome. Looking at your words and reactions in this thread, it is easy to connect the two.
I would concentrate on that rather than the teacher reminding the class of appropriate v inappropriate actions

Thank yoh Millie and KMo.

My chuld is asleep now but they said that the teacher told them two news today (one irrelevant - something like angroupnof children flooded the loos or whatever) and the other one was worse, it was about another child, a small child in reception that went to the loo and was followed there by an older child Y5 or Y6, not sure amd was „asked/ forced” to show their private parts. I asked if the child managedbto run away or did they showntbeir privates. My child said the snall child was scared so did it but they were very brave and told the teacher.
That’s as verbatim as I can get. Then my child sainthey didn’t think the teacher should have told them because now it’s swirling their head and can’t stop thinking about it.
I did ask so what is sonuosetting about it but I got „I don’t know, just can’t stop thinking about it.”

No, I didn’t just pop on to say that. My first post said I sympathised with you.

Then I read on, and ... well, you’ve lost me. Very odd thread.

preston again I did not call the incident gruesome and upsetting.

You said you filter gruesome and upsetting news so it's the first time DC heard about something like this.

I don’t think the apple fell far from the tree. Throughout this thread your language was emotive and exaggerated and your child’s language is as well.

They have no idea if the child was scared or what happened and the teacher will not have went into detail about being scared and telling teachers.

I had no reaction when my child told me other than „oh really? What else the teacher say?” And other aha and umm.

I asked if the child managedbto run away or did they showntbeir privates.

So which was it?

Look at your op again
You said “ I’d filter particularly gruesome and upsetting news so it’s the first time DC heard something like that”
It’s quite clear that you consider the incident gruesome and upsetting

Whoops cross post

But.... you did say it was gruesome and upsetting so why are you saying you didn't ?

I'd filter particularly gruesome and upsetting news so it's the first time DC heard about something like this.

So you don't actually know what happened, what the teacher said or why?
Maybe the teacher used this as an example whilst doing pshe on pants? Maybe no child asked to see another's private parts ....

Do you know which children it was? It sounds like you want to start a witch-hunt without any actual facts

Name change fail?

Did you just have a nc fail op?

If 100% of people on a post with 160+ replies are ALL saying that you are being unreasonable I think you should maybe accept that you are in fact being unreasonable.
I'm just saying, it's a suggestion you might want to take on board.
Not all of these people are wrong. You are for mollycoddling your children to the point that you are outraged that their teachers educated them on what is and isn't acceptable behaviour.

Different name ?

"I'd filter particularly gruesome and upsetting news so it's the first time DC heard about something like this." - there is a very simple inference here that what your child was told falls into your category of gruesome/upsetting.

Name change fail....

Look at the language you used. By asking if the child ran away you are demonstrating that fear was involved. Your kid will have picked up on that.

OP, I am surprised that your DC had such a strong reaction to what they'd been told by the teacher.
I'm surprised you aren't supportive of the teaching staff addressing this with the children in an appropriate and timely manner.
I'm surprised that you are being defensive and slightly aggressive in your tone on this thread.
I can understand that it must be distressing to know that incidents such as you describe happen so close to home, but surely you can see that this is exactly why children shouldn't be sheltered from age appropriate knowledge of how to safeguard themselves and that bad things happen.

I find this rather unpleasant OP. It seems like you’re particularly enjoying being involved vicariously in the incident.

Yes these things happen, yes it is inappropriate, school handled it perfectly.

Your frothing is a massive overreaction as is the language you’re using to describe the incident.

How does your child know so much detail e.g that the child was in reception/ didnt run as too scared...
If that's come from the teacher telling them I would surprised and asking to see the HT as such detail not necessary.

if this happened at all I'd say the poor old teachers are damned if they do and damned if they don't!!

Cashewsandhummus There have to be some rough schools some of your children must go to.

well.. ok, people still aren't agreeing with you

Cashewsandhummus - yes, I suspect the school was right and you are overreacting. Do you generally have a problem trusting the school's judgement on how best to deal with a situation?