Hand hold pls - think I'm watching my mother die

[RogerAllamsFangirl]

Sitting in a side room on a hospital ward. She's struggling to breathe and clammy and cold. I was here earlier and went home but the nurse rang me to tell me to come over.

Tbh, watching her like this, I think that death, when it comes, will come as a friend.

roger so sorry for what you're going through. You're by her side and that's all that matters. Thinking of you xx

No words OP

Another hand hold here x
Just talk if you can, squeeze her hand if you can't. Don't worry about crying - in a weird way I'd be kind of pleased for a few tears if I were passing away - I'd know I'd done something right even though I don't want my family to be in pain. I've probably phrased that very clumsily. When my step mom was at this phase we just chatted to her & reminisced over stupid times that would mean nothing to anyone else xx
We're all here with you sending you love & strength xx

I'm so sorry OP. Thinking of you and your mum

I've just been through something similar, OP.

Something that helped me was to think about the way that as it's our parents' job to bring us into the world, it's our job to see them out, and to try to do it well. That sort of have me a sense of purpose, which helped in the fog and sadness.

gave me a sense of purpose.

- I was with FIL when he died, thinking of you.

A handhold from me lass.

Thinking of you x

Hold her hand and give her comfort in her final hours x

Thinking of you

Another hand hold here op. Thinking of you and your dm

OP

Another hand here x

I was with my Father when he was dying and my Aunt gave out to me for crying. Don't be afraid to cry, tell her you love her, hold her hand and fix/ rub her hair. On a practical level if you want to get one of the glycerin swab kits to moisten her lips if you think she needs it. Am so very sorry you are going through this. Tell her not to be scared that you are right there with her. That is all she needs now is to know you are with her. You might not feel it now but you are stronger than you know xx

to you OP. It's very good that you are there with your mum. Wishing her a peaceful end, and strength and comfort to you.

Hand holding - I hope your dear mother finds peace and comfort with you by her side x

Fangirl offering you a hand to hold and a virtual hug. I'm a few weeks ahead of you and remember those last few days/hours, they were both a curse and a privilege. Hold her hand, talk to her and let her go

Offering you a hand hold. I sat with my mum in the final hours. I told her what a wonderful mother she had been, thanked her and told her how much I loved her. I'm so sorry you're going through this, you're stronger than you know. I now have a daughter and this may sound weird but the thought of her being there in my final hours gives me comfort. Please talk to her, she can hear you x

A big hug from me. I sat with my dad for two days/nights, playing his favourite music on cd and talking to him, telling him over and over how much I loved him.

In the end I had to go home for a shower and to sort out the children and my mum who is severely disabled.

And that was when he went. I honestly believe that if he had any control over what was happening that is what he would have wanted to happen - in private, by himself, without me fussing and weeping.

It really was a privilege to spend those last few days with him.

Have you got anyone who can come and keep you company? I was so glad to have friends who called in to the ward over the last few days even though he was unconscious I was glad to have them there.

I'm so sorry. Can't imagine how difficult it must be for for

Another one offering you my hand to hold. I absolutely feel your heartache and hope you realise that your are not alone in thoughts.

The hearing is supposed to be the last thing that goes and so your mum will know that you are there even if she can't let you know that she knows. You are being amazingly brave and you are right; death, when it comes will probably be here friend. But that doesn't make it any easier for you. Xxx

and another handhold x

If it is any comfort, I was at death's door after an accident and there was no way that I could reach out through the morphine to my loved ones but I remember every word that was said to me as clearly as if it were right now.

I have been there too with my father, the same, aggressive cancer... If you can, talk to her tell her how much you love her, remember happy times, play a favourite song, stroke her hair, hold her hand. She will know you are there xxx

It is lovely that you can be there with her holding her hand and telling her how much she is loved. Sending you strength and peace

Really sorry to read this, Roger, peace and light to your lovely Mum. [thanks[