Stupid/offensive things people say when you're disabled

[SeekingClosure]

I have ms and use a mobility scooter for longer distances. Yesterday I was at a tourist attraction having a nice time, when a member of staff came up to me to say 'oh it's alright for some, riding about on that all day!'. I was quite taken aback at his crassness but my female conditioning came into play and I did a cross between eyes raised in incredulity and a smile. I didn't make a complaint because his I.d. indicated he was a volunteer.

When I go to Aldi I walk around leaning on the trolley, some days with more difficulty than others. One day the assistant on the till remarked brightly 'you're hobbling less than usual today!'. Hobbling fgs.

I realise these two examples were not intentionally hurtful but really, why comment on a person's disability at all? My illness is not public property!

Share your examples of this kind of thing please. I would especially love to hear any fitting retorts you have made as I am always stunned into silence!

Genuinely shocked by a woman’s words and behaviour today at Alton Towers. I was given a special access wristband which meant we had quicker and easier access to rides which was a godsend as I’d been dreading all the walking and standing as I tire v quick. We were in the special access que and were second from front when a woman marched up to the entrance and demanded that herself and her adult autistic son be let in immediately as otherwise he would “kick off and you won’t want that and besides looking at the majority in this que they don’t look that disabled and can wait a bit longer” she then proceeded to have a go at the staff as there’s was some rule or other that needed to be complied with and demanded that a manager come down to discuss it. As her son was by then getting upset and stresssed they couldn’t close the safety gate meaning no one could exit the rides which was probably about 60 people stuck in the roller coaster! Which in turn meant all of the people waiting to board were stuck in the pissing rain. Actually so annoyed by her rude entitled behaviour and from what I could see the only person causing her sons distress was her

Have you tried mindfulness

Very, very sadly this is a favourite in the NHS

‘I do think we should reflect everyone but maybe there is something about some conditions that means they just can’t rise to senior levels. You can’t fit a square peg in a round hole’

At work. Quite often. New CEO had my condition. Put a stop to that chat.

I was born without a thumb on one hand. Once when in hospital for an operation the Consultant (old school think bow tie and carnation in button hole) asked how I managed without a thumb. I said I coped just fine and realised I'd save a lot of money over a lifetime only having to use nail varnish on 9 rather than 10 nails at time. He moved swiftly on to the next bed. The female Junior doctor had to work very hard to keep a straight face. :)

DD has MS (diagnosed 15 +years ago). This time going on holiday we decided to use the Special Assistance Service for the first time. It was really good, especially on the English side.
However DH heard a woman on the German side say loudly 'How come they get to jump the queue.' Good job I didn't hear or I would have said 'Well any time you want to swap and have MS you can jump the queue too.'

@MargaretDribble I have MS too and am so tired of the comments I get about not looking ill. I’d been so looking forward to Alton Towers yesterday but was worried about the queuing and walking. The wrist band they give you was a massive help. But I was so upset by this woman’s comments and behaviour, I’m sure she would have been the first to get angry if someone said why is your son jumping the special assistance que? But no one did we were polite and understanding, unfortunately she thought the world revolves around her! My daughter was so upset when she heard the woman say none of us in the que looked that disabled and should wait

Tara336 DD was actually in a special assistance wheelchair, carrying her stick, which would be enough for most people!
I think people in the special assistance queue at Alton Towers should have been less polite. She probably makes a habit of it, and gets her own way because people want to get rid of her. I know people like that in RL.

Being starred at, being photographed when I'm trying to do something really mundane or with my DC.
Being told that 'you aren't really disabled though, just short'....erm nope, that's the least of my problems with ms, spinal stenosis and arthritis is pretty much all my main joints and back.

The patronising 'oh but you cope so well' 'you're always smiling' 'you're an inspiration'. Really I'm not, I just don't tell everyone about how I sometimes cry because everything hurts or that my mobility is rapidly disappearing, or that today I actually couldn't clean myself after going to the toilet because the pain in slightly bending is so bad.

'your children will have a much better empathy for people because of you, and aren't they wonderfully independent and so grown up'
I'd give anything for my children to be ordinary 4 and 5 year olds rather than them having the responsibilities for themselves at such a young age.

@MargaretDribble DP was about to give her a mouthful but I said leave it as i just wanted to get on the ride and away from her. As it goes we got on the ride and had to exit exactly where she was, still waiting for a manager and still being awful to Alton Towers staff! She was glaring at us as if we had somehow offended her! I think your right though that she does this all the time

Oh the Free Car Bullshit makes me murderous I had the conversation first at 16 with this bitch at school in which I explained to her how and why it's not free it's a choice

But apparently I was wrong because her neighbour had said her sons car was free

People also don't realise that the vast majority of people if they receive Local Authority Dom Care have to give the Care Component back too now

I can't get a "Free Car" because if I got one and gave up my mobility for it, I wouldn't be able to afford to run it, petrol wise.