At one of her homes with Liz 'I'm broke' Jones and her mythical friends, including the ones who aren't her friends anymore, on her Prada inspired Island where pubes are banned and eating is disordered

[cario]

OK, the thread on 'chat' has expired and we can't really stretch the whole 'who is the RS' thing any further as we're already pretty sure it's a mythical entity. Once she'd found out she'd been busted re the 'married man in S America' hallucination, Liz Jones has been busy practicing backpedalling as fast as her hairy little Prada enclosed legs will go so herewith a new thread, to enable a) us to continue marvelling at her audacity and self obsession (aka taking the piss) and b) continue to give our Liz ideas for her column, as she seemed to pick ones from the old thread with such ease. Liz - here's looking at you (and your dreadfully applied eyeliner)

Excellent. Am a big fan Liz

And hello too to all the DM researchers . Always a pleasure.

Marvellous. This could be my new hobby.

Did I read somewhere she's had a face lift? Liz, you need to get a new hairstyle. And colour.

indeed LeBOF- unfortunately, I'm getting as obsessed with the Lizard as she is with herself, though hers is love as opposed to my, hmm not hate - more derision. I think I might have to start some sort of self help group.

The DM seem to nick everything off the cheezeburger site at the moment.

I really haven't got time for this, I am a vegan you know? I need to make sure my buttermilk suede trousers fit my bony arse so I can go and drink my milk-from-cows-with-pensions (that I sell in Selfridges dontchaknow?) What kind of a vegetable does suede come from? How dare you diss my eyeliner, tis a trademark!

actually, I have a theory re the eyeliner - I think she's still applying it in exactly the same position as pre facelift, not accounting for the fact that her eyes have moved.

That would account for the white gap which I always thought was eyelash glue

so, where were we - I'm still waiting for Kitya to turn up and answer my question re intimacy with RSs.....

I've sent her the LJ alert

I answered you last night but, it got deleted!!! its nowt to get excited about anyways. I was different in my younger, slimmer days.

Re the hair, she has had it done since her famous I am a sperm stealer tv appearance and, it does look much better.

Ah yes, now THAT was a seminal performance

katkit - my life is such at the moment that Persil changing their bio formula is something to get excited about!!!

What did I miss last night then? I have no RS shagging stories to share

nothing major, Katkit just mentioned that she hoped she'd never shared a shag which got me wondering. I'm still wondering.....

Don't you know that VB has forgiven her for all her nastiness and invited her to an exclusive viewing of her next line, which is going to be for Chanel?

Lets be abit fair to her. She is supposed to be a good interviewer and fashion journalist. What is VB forgiving her for? for being thinner than her?

.... shagging her husband?

Ah yes, she didn't let LJ in her show last time did she. Does VB still hate the DM?

apparently VB has a very good sense of humour. That's probably why she's invited Liz.

I'd pay bad money to see Liz slug it out with Mary Portas, wouldn't last long though

Do you know what? I was thinking today for a change one of my favourite journalists is Polly Vernon, also another fashion journo ex editor. She's fab but, tbh, her articles when not about fashion are about how she panics if she goes over a size 6, how she never wants children, the best swanky places to drink in etc etc. Really, don't you think all fashion journalists are the same deep down? Yes, liz is annoying but she really only goes on about the same stuff as the others.

And, she was right what she said to Mary. It's just a shame she looked like she'd been dragged through a hedge backwards when she said it.

I tend not to read the others though, and I only know LJ from the diary and Jones Moans really.

I see Polly Vernon around, as we must live near each other. She looks in, and I'm not exaggerating, every reflective surface she walks past. Once I saw her shopping in Sainsbos- there were some chicken goujons in her basket.