At one of her homes with Liz 'I'm broke' Jones and her mythical friends, including the ones who aren't her friends anymore, on her Prada inspired Island where pubes are banned and eating is disordered

[cario]

OK, the thread on 'chat' has expired and we can't really stretch the whole 'who is the RS' thing any further as we're already pretty sure it's a mythical entity. Once she'd found out she'd been busted re the 'married man in S America' hallucination, Liz Jones has been busy practicing backpedalling as fast as her hairy little Prada enclosed legs will go so herewith a new thread, to enable a) us to continue marvelling at her audacity and self obsession (aka taking the piss) and b) continue to give our Liz ideas for her column, as she seemed to pick ones from the old thread with such ease. Liz - here's looking at you (and your dreadfully applied eyeliner)

I'm never even sure what point she was trying to make How can this be considered decent reading material?

It's a 'I'm so lovely and generous and kind to every single person and creature and nothing's my fault and I really can't remember what stories I've told before which is why I keep contradicting myself and perhaps new 4x4s don't count as cars so I have to borrow one' piece. Pathetic.

Obviously, that should read ''I'm so lovely and generous and kind to every single person and creature except for my own mother and, of course, my brother in Aus who I couldn't be arsed to go and see in spite of his illness'

I think we would all like to know which lender she used to get the second mortgage!
I am now completely confused as I thought her assistant Nic had the converted barn. If her sister was given it why does she now need a cottage?
Was the point of writing all that to make her sister feel guilty? Liz said her sister moved to Exmoor to be near her, and presumably help out with the animals.
The apparent devotion of the RS is not mentioned at all in the 'poor poor me, nobody loves me' rant. Here is a man (if he exists of course) who appears to love her, is very wealthy, so, on the face of it, appears to be the answer to all her prayers.
Unfortunately Liz Jones is a woman who will never be happy.

Step away from the Mail, ladies. No good can come of it .

I read some horrible thing she wrote on Victoria Beckham the other day in the Mail cough. Vicious. I have no time for VB and her vacuous 'I is fashion, innit' foolishness, but Christ, LJ went to town on her. She leeches off the success of other women 'slebs' in the most spiteful and sinister way.

Did someone say PV read this thread? Oops. That Observer mag doesnt exist any more does it? Or does it? God, that was grim. Basically amounted to her and that sour-faced fashion woman (Jess Double-Barrell-ey-summat) harping on about having their fingers on the pulse of cool.

Note to self: Must stop reading this shit.

It's because, like her or loathe her, VB is thin, has kids, is pretty well liked by her friends (indeed, has friends...), has a husband no sensible woman would kick out of bed and a career - now, let's count up how many of those things apply to Lizard ...... anyway, makes a change from her picking on Kirstie Allsop

Note to MagsAloof: Don't stop reading this shit - you'll have to deal with real things instead

Well said! The Kirsty vitriol really confuses me, it must be pure jealousy that the "fat" girl is so succesful and happy, whereas Lizard starves herself into clothes she is decades too old to wear and has a miserable existence judging others by the stuff they have.

In fact.....LJ if you are reading this have some messy sex and a pie

But not a shop bought hot pie or it will cost her more!! We all know she is completely broke don't we?!

Not according to today's column Susannah, she has built a new 'wing' housing a bedroom suite with luxe bathroom.

no doubt she got the marble shower from Wickes.

How on earth can we be expected to take her seriously when the previous diary was taken up with explaining why she is broke, then this current one mentions the luxury bathroom ? Surely she must see how ridiculous it all is.

I tried to read this week's column about the ficticious tour but it comes up saying the URL is no longer available. Am now speculating feverishly as to the reason why

aha - but they can't unpublish the hard copy...... you're not missing much, just another poor me and the pretend RS didn't shag her before he went on tour (first realistic thing I've read from her), but she's going to lay out 7,000 for a ticket to Aus to see him because she doesn't travel economy..... that'll be the 7,000 she couldn't afford to see her brother then? [buconfused]

Would somebody let me know if this thread is still active please, or post a link to a current thread please?
I can't believe no-one has anything to say about the latest rant from our Liz!

Oh I haven't read it for two weeks as it wouldn't load it online. Go on then? What was it?

Did you see Polly Vernon twittering about you all yesterday? Not me, cos she knows I like her.

I have just been plain dumbstruck at the tosh that spouts forth from that woman (LJ - haven't read PV). It's all been about her going to Aus/not going to Aus, flying first class/flying economy, buying her own ticket/him buying it. She did actually put stars instead of an alleged hit record name, probably to elicit some sort of reaction as we've all been quiet but, to be honest, we could spend hours deciphering the number of stars (it was 4 or 5 words) and get nowhere and can anybody be arsed anymore? This has all been interspersed with 'poor me, I buy them everything but have no friends' stuff. Her lack of self awareness and social skill can't help but make me wonder, 'psychopathic (true sense) personality or mild end autistic spectrum': psych students - discuss.....

Just looked at PV's comments about us on Twitter. She know us by our fleece apparently. Whereas we know "totally" know her from the desperate clawing at the last vestiges of her long-departed youth.

Oh, I don't have a fleece, I feel left out..... I don't Twit either - so can't read her twitting. Shame, maybe I'd learn from where to obtain my fleece.

I have neither a fleece or a twitter account, I just googled her name and twitter was the first thing that came up. Hers is a load of self-congratulatory bollocks about mucus botox or somesuch. How do these women make a career of being self-obsessed?

oh yes, I didn't know you could do that (get twits not google), I'm waaaay behind the times. I have to say now, I fully understand why I've never twitted- change the 'i' for an 'a' and that about sums it up.................

I don't use it either, the smugness scares me

On twitter PV says 'revenge stalking the woman who stalked me round sainsbos. I know her cos of her fleece'

She thinks I stalked her round sainsbos! she thinks I wear a fleece!! Brilliant.

I was just being nosey cos I remembered her piece about being thin and how great it is and wondered how she does it. So i checked out her basket and revealed all on MN. Also I've seen her checking herself out in a lot of windows. But I only know of her cos we have a mutual 'friend'.

I hope I haven't caused her to feel paranoid in Sainsbos. I check out a lot of baskets not just hers.

She should be thanking you for giving her some material to write about that is not totally self-obsessed drivel

ye gods !!!