I am a Black male stripper and naked cleaner/butler in London working almost exclusively for white women. AMA

[OliverMartins]

As the title says. Happy to answer any questions you might have.

@Meepsh

I have reported your increasingly offensive posts as I hope others have done.

I’m sure behind all the anger and bile there is genuine concern, but that has now got lost and you are simply attacking someone.

Now do yourself a favour and leave the thread, no one should be spoken to the way you’re speaking to the OP.

Can you provide any empirical evidence about how my work has negative societal effects on young Black men?

How much can you bench press OP?

@theduchessofspork oh! Yes definitely!

I think I'm quite angry at sex work in general and find it hard to buy into the empowering element of it

I think it's also important to consider where the power lies, even if the women in question here are getting off on the young black man cleaning their house, I'm assuming he could ultimately keep himself safe as physically if not metaphorically at least in this situation he has the power. Female sex workers very rarely have that luxury. My concern is pretending this kind of sex work is somehow removed and nothing to do with 'other' stuff where women are hurt and abused - surely they are all linked

I feel about this the same way I do about women in prostitution or other forms of commercialisation of sex. Even in those rare cases where the woman is freely doing this and is in the fortunate position of being able to choose clients she is safe with, I still don't agree with it. I just think it is wrong to treat people as sexual objects that can be purchased. I don't think the implications of this are just between the 'buyer and seller'. I think they permeate outside this relationship. I really dislike the race element of this too.

I see this as being like working in Hooters, pole dancing, bikini car wash places, and the women draped on cars in launch parties and formula one.

It is objectifying in exactly the same way. It’s harder for me to really get the fetishisation side of it. I think I accept women are allowed to do that kind of modelling, so can’t see why this is very different.

I don't think it is something that requires empirical evidence, it is self evident. Any woman in their thirties or above will tell you about the damage that male sexual objectification has done them, physically, emotionally, financially. I work in a secondary school in South London and I see the young black and mixed race boys being stereotyped every day. I just feel sorry for the young boys I know who are studying hard to get good A levels and trying to get into prestigious internships in the city. I think they would be dismayed to think one of the women Interviewing them had paid for a black naked butler/cleaner over the weekend. They already have to deal with stereotypes about gangs and crime, which they absolutely hate. They also talk a lot about their heritage and the slave trade and how glad they are that that is 'in the past'. This kind of thing seems to echo back to this for me and I couldn't be involved in that.

See, I 'd rather we had a world where no-one did this kind of thing because no-one wanted to buy it, because we all saw its rubbish to view other human beings in this way.

Who is Oliver Martins and why have you chosen to use their name on Mumsnet?

And the F1 and darts thing at least isn't really a thing anymore. Is Hooters even still in this country? I think there's a couple left. As a society, we have evolved, somewhat, in term of female sexual objectification, though obviously sex tarficking, prostitution, OF etc still exist. I'm sorry OP but what you do, whilst relatively mild in comparison, sure, still seems like a regressive throw back to that kind of thing.

Why did you choose mumsnet?

I like discussion and to hear diverse voices.

I do have clients in the City actually.

I'd be interested if you'd answer this OP.

It is my stage name. Simple as that.

Well there we go.

I think @AIstolemylunch made their case really well.

For my part, just as men who go to strip clubs are never going to truly see women as equal, a white woman purchasing a 'service' ( or rather a black body) like yours is never going to really see black men as equal human beings.

The woman in the scenario will still be conducting the interview whether my service is available or not. The only differences are that a) her kink will find a less benign outlet and b)my bank account will be a lot emptier.

Is it a kink, or is it racism?

A kink, 100%

How can a racial kink not be racism? How do you separate the two?
If you want to ride that wave, fine, but I think you're in denial about the dynamic.

I agree.
It still is a choice people have though.

I think if you witnessed the dynamic, you might think differently.

I don't agree with this, and I don't think comparable research really supports it. Instead services like the one you outline normalise and reinforce these women's racist attitudes by giving them a practice and outlet for them.

People have made the argument that providing child abuse pornography through animation, or though sex dolls in the size and image of babies and children helps to provide a 'benign' outlet for these 'urges'. But what evidence base there is on this would suggest the opposite. It just reinforces and encourages the paedophilia.

People used to make the same argument about prostitution, that is stopped rape or the Brenda Line in the Samaritans ( where female volunteers were required to keep speaking to men making sex calls or masturbating) that it stopped these men attacking women by giving them a benign 'outlet' No-one really buys these arguments now - they are discredited.

Well it's not one that the young kids I know have, all of whom date indiscriminaty of race and are probably too young to have developed sexual kinks yet. I'd personally rather that the racial based kinks were left to die out before they get there. Arguably they will anyway, as the reason for some of these kinks will no longer exist - white women 'othering' back men and wanting to be 'sexually violated' by them and all that nonsense about all black men having bigger dicks than all white men is because they will have been bought up in environments where there weren't many black people or by racist white parents, hence the tabboo. So make bank while you can, I guess.

And I'm sorry, the idea that you are somehow saving the world from a cohort of racist women by nakedly cleaning whilst they watch, is a bit thin.