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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Housekeeper playing music- aibu?

474 replies

NoMusicPlease · 22/10/2026 16:24

I live in a large house on a farm. I have a housekeeper who comes in each day between 10-6.

Today I was in the garden and she drove up to the house and parked outside. I could hear her music which annoyed me because I moved to the country for peace and quiet. It wasn't blasting but I don't want to hear any music while I'm outside.

I told her she's not allowed to play music while she's driving on the farm and she seemed a bit upset and was much quieter than normal. I think that might have to do with her personal circumstances because she's currently getting divorced.

Was I being unreasonable?

OP posts:
BeatrizBoniface · 22/10/2026 17:13

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

😂

GreenCaterpillarOnALeaf · 22/10/2026 17:13

If this isn’t bait come the glorious day of the revolution I think your housekeeper will want you first up against the wall 😭😭

Original poster
NoMusicPlease · 22/10/2026 17:14

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

Not generally but I was today

OP posts:
BeatrizBoniface · 22/10/2026 17:15

GreenCaterpillarOnALeaf · 22/10/2026 17:13

If this isn’t bait come the glorious day of the revolution I think your housekeeper will want you first up against the wall 😭😭

... with the large house and land getting confiscated and given to all their workers.

Perisalt · 22/10/2026 17:16

Odd time of day for such a post: normally they’re late at night.

JudyTeeny · 22/10/2026 17:17

Well done on concocting a thread that manages to tell everyone you live in a big house and have staff.
I imagine good domestic staff are hard to find, so I hope she finds herself a new position working for a human.

AlwaysExtraHot · 22/10/2026 17:17

JudyTeeny · 22/10/2026 17:17

Well done on concocting a thread that manages to tell everyone you live in a big house and have staff.
I imagine good domestic staff are hard to find, so I hope she finds herself a new position working for a human.

Yes, this.

feathermucker · 22/10/2026 17:18

Drip feed. Do better. Treat your staff with respect. If the music is an issue, there are ways to approach the issue without being an arsehole about it.

amber763 · 22/10/2026 17:19

Sorry but this is mental and if I was your housekeeper id not be coming back

AutumnCrowStorm · 22/10/2026 17:20

NoMusicPlease · 22/10/2026 17:14

Not generally but I was today

Show quote history

Ok so apologise for your previous misery, and explain that you’d appreciate it if you can compromise on the loud music situation, ie when she’s on your property she turns it down so it’s not bothering you.

If she makes sure her vehicle windows are closed it’ll help a lot too.

It’s about being reasonable.

Waitingfordoggo · 22/10/2026 17:20

YAB ridiculous.

Or you would be, if this was a genuine post.

Beachtastic · 22/10/2026 17:20

Get her some Xiaomi Redmi ear buds 😁 she can listen to music from her phone while she's working!

Less than a tenner and really good (I have some)

https://www.amazon.co.uk/XIAOMI-Redmi-Wireless-Earbuds-Battery-Blue/dp/B0DBHTG7ZX?ref=astblcpldp

BeatrizBoniface · 22/10/2026 17:21

amber763 · 22/10/2026 17:19

Sorry but this is mental and if I was your housekeeper id not be coming back

Same here

Ohhelpwhatnow · 22/10/2026 17:22

NoMusicPlease · 22/10/2026 17:02

I'm not troll hunting or posting this as a reverse.

I'm also not posh.

I have very severe migraines and had surgery on my ears recently that's left me extremely sensitive to noise. Not all noise, but certain pitches are agony.

I think I might have been a bitch to her and she didn't deserve it. I'll apologize and explain why I snapped at her.

And of course everyone in the world knows which pitches are painful for you and should avoid them, without being told.

Tootyfilou · 22/10/2026 17:23

@BeatrizBoniface and @GreenCaterpillarOnALeaf
We live in hope.💪

BeatrizBoniface · 22/10/2026 17:25

Tootyfilou · 22/10/2026 17:23

@BeatrizBoniface and @GreenCaterpillarOnALeaf
We live in hope.💪

😂 has this released the Bolshevik in anyone else?

Hankunamatata · 22/10/2026 17:27

Wow nasty and extremely picky. You dont get to control what she does in her car.

DarthVadersGlove · 22/10/2026 17:28

I don’t like any sort of music. I don’t listen to music and when I hear music like in the supermarket or at the Dentist I find it really irritating to me. It is just noise like a hydraulic drill is noise.

However, complaining that a person has music in their car, their own car is absolute madness.

Forton26 · 22/10/2026 17:28

HaveANiceFuckingDay · 22/10/2026 16:29

Its half term next week that batshit posts are starting already it seems

i never understand this. I’m sure kids have got better things to do do than troll a website they likely don’t even know about unless an adult they know uses it but what kids notice that?.

Times have changed. They have access to a hell of a lot more these days.

It’s more likely just an adult trolling for attention or even mumsnet generating some traffic….

BeatrizBoniface · 22/10/2026 17:29

Anyone else enjoy the detail "she's currently getting divorced"?
Yeah mate, that's why she's upset.

StormGazing · 22/10/2026 17:29

Apologise and explain. I suspect she’ll understand. My cleaner wears ear pods when she’s here cleaning which is perfectly acceptable IMO

pilates · 22/10/2026 17:31

Just apologise

Daygloboo · 22/10/2026 17:31

NoMusicPlease · 22/10/2026 16:28

She had it playing for a couple of minutes while she was gathering her things.

I think she should have turned it off as soon as she stopped the car.

Is this a wind up, because if it isnt I think you need to get out more.

BeatrizBoniface · 22/10/2026 17:32

"Explain" what, @StormGazing ? That she's completely and utterly unreasonable, high handed and self absorbed?. Of course earpods when cleaning are "perfectly acceptable".
So is having 2 minutes of music before you get out the car.

BeatrizBoniface · 22/10/2026 17:32

pilates · 22/10/2026 17:31

Just apologise

Also give her a pay rise. Whatever you pay her, it's not enough.