It seems like several of us doing Bootcamp struggle with eating for all sorts of reasons that have nothing to do with hunger ... boredom, tiredness, stress, upset, and even when happy or celebrating.
I thought a thread where we can share experiences, resources and tips might help us stop self-sabotaging and increase our Bootcamp success. Just because cream is a bootcamp approved food doesn't mean you should eat a whole pot in one go because you had a crap day ...
I started a thread about this a while back so I will repost my story:
^Background (apologies for length): I have been a 'big girl' ever since I hit puberty, diagnosed with PCOS in my late teens. I seem to settle at size 16-18 and usually weigh around 90-100 kilos. I am now in my 30s and have just had DD2 which has obviously affected my tummy and I look flabbier than ever. I have lost weight in the past on low-carb diets or on 5:2 but always get derailed and never manage to maintain any loss.
My mother is a classic narcissist and we have a difficult relationship. One of her biggest sticking points is my weight. She herself is vain and insecure and constantly references her weight, what she is eating, how she needs to exercise etc. She grabs her tummy and says how disgusting she looks. This is almost a game or a habit as she never actually does anything to address it. Ever since I started to gain weight in my teens she has commented on it, screamed and shouted at me to lose weight, been extremely negative etc to the point of giving me a huge complex, shredding my self esteem/confidence and leaving me with disordered thoughts around food and eating. Of course she never actually helped me to take any positive steps to lose weight or begin exercising, and I have come to understand that in a way she actually wants me to be overweight as it reduces my threat to her vanity and she has sabotaged me to ensure I stay big, eg always bringing cakes/biscuits when she visits. I have struggled with depression and anxiety and have found my negative thinking about my appearance has affected my life, especially before I met my DH. For example missing a friend's wedding because I thought I looked hideous in all my outfits.
I was always a 'good girl', no drinking, smoking, boys and successful academically - eating was my only 'vice'. I comfort eat a lot, when I am stressed, sad, angry, bored etc I immediately crave sweet foods. I have only been able to maintain dieting/healthy eating during stable and stress free periods of my life, as soon as there is any difficulty I want to eat eat eat again. I also began to self harm in my teens and will still do so in extremis - I think that overeating and ruining my health by doing so is a form of self harm and fits with that mindset. But ironically I harm myself most over my weight, eg I once carved 'fat cow' into my stomach with a pair of scissors.
Now I have 2 daughters I am terrified of passing on my thoughts about my body image and eating to them. I want them to see me maintaining a healthy lifestyle, eating well with treats in moderation, exercising for pleasure and being positive, dressing well and taking care of myself no matter my size. But it is so hard to implement. I know how to eat healthily and about nutrition and what is good for me as a woman with PCOS. I know it will be beneficial to my long term health to eat a low carb, low sugar diet and maintain that. I know that my negative thoughts about my body and my low self esteem come from my mother. But I can't make myself stop thinking these negative thoughts. I can't approach a healthy lifestyle in a positive way, as a good thing I am doing for myself and my family. I feel resentful of the PCOS, deprived and sulky. I spiral into self-abusive comments, call myself useless, a failure, a waste of space. I fantasize about cutting my tummy.
How do I address the gap between what my rational mind understands (these negative thoughts come from my upbringing, a healthy lifestyle will be beneficial) and what my emotional self feels (waaaaa I want the cake it's not fair, why can't I have the cake, I shouldn't have the cake, just eat the cake, now look you fat bitch you've eaten the cake, you can't do anything right)?
It is so exhausting thinking about food constantly. I want to eat, I shouldn't eat, what can I eat... I just want to break this cycle and think about food normally!^
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Low-carb bootcamp
Defeating emotional eating
OldBooks · 25/06/2017 19:39
Oldbooks that was a difficult to read bit thanks for sharing 
I've always been a bit of a binge eater, but I always got away with it weight wise until I got pregnant.
I think I probably had an eating disorder when I was 15-18 as I severly restricted food, sometimes binged and excessively excercised. It improved when I went to university and drinking took priority for a while.
I'm the opposite in that I've never been a 'good' girl because I've smoked, drank, taken drugs from a teenager.
When I was pregnant with Dd and I stopped all the other fun stuff, the only treat I felt like I had left was food so I just ate cakes and pastries constantly. Interestingly I first noticed when I was pregnant that simple carbs gave me migraines.
After I had her, the first few months were so tiring and whenever I'm tired I just craved cake and toast as I felt like those foods gave me an energy boost.
She's 20 months now and its alot easier now we all get some sleep.
Anyway I've been low carbing for 8ish weeks now and I have lost weight but I'm still eating too much out of boredom and the compulsion to 'treat' myself. I feel great on this WOE, no big energy dips and headaches in the afternoon. I don't get awful and shakey when I'm hungry.
I still can't be trusted with cream, cheese, yogurt etc. I'm definately not going on mad food binges like eating a massive pack of biscuits but I've still eaten a pot of cream in a day!
My problem is picking when bored at home and I always want a bloody 'treat' of an evening. I think that comes from drinking and really I'm trying to replace the 'unwinding' ritual.
Thank you all for joining and sharing your stories. I have been looking at inspirational / motivating quotes which I will list out when I get the chance.
If anyone reads or sees something useful do tell us, and if possible give us a synopsis.
Moist you express such strong hatred for your body, where do you think that has come from?
Dust I couldn't agree more with how humiliating it is to regain after a loss. Everyone gives you so much praise for losing weight (I have a massive problem with this but that's another discussion) and to put it back on feels like a moral or character failure rather than messed up bio-chemistry.
Scooby I am the same about wanting a 'treat' in the evenings, it seems to be totally programmed into me even if my main meal has left me stuffed. I read once that an experiment was done where rats were given a full meal then something sweet. After a while they stopped giving the sweet food. Even though they had eaten enough and shouldn't be hungry the rats were wandering around the cage looking for that sweet finishing food. When I get agitated looking for something sweet I tell myself I am being the rat!
for all of us.
I've been lurking on the bootcamp thread and it's taken me a few days to post here. Thanks for starting the thread oldbooks.
So I've had a tough few years with my health. Been on steroids for over 15 years now. Gained A LOT of weight. Had a successful year low-carbing about 4 years ago when I lost 5 stone, then my health detiorated which led to me being bed bound and gaining it all back again. I hit my highest weight earlier this year at over 20 stone!
I'm still on oramorph which is really sugary but it keeps my pain under control so I'm hoping I can continue low-carbing even if the oramorph ups my carb intake.
I am getting married next year and really want to feel like I have my eating under some kind of control alongside weight loss. I got into a bad cycle of rewarding myself with food then hating myself for eating cake, and then bingeing on all the bad stuff.
For me my success of not binging since I started bootcamp 33 days ago has been non-food rewards. A little treat at the end of each week - magazine, new book, manicure, new tshirt so far. It has really helped keep me going.
Thanks again for this thread
for all of you.
Facing the need to lose weight is tough enough. But when there are emotional issues, it's even harder. I take my hat off to all of you who are struggling.
I'm not really sure that the day-to-day chat threads are always sufficiently supportive (not that people don't want to help!) so this is a really good place to post.
Good luck to you all.
Hello all, sorry have been quiet, have been feeling a bit low and finding myself in binge mentality. Today it seems AF is here again, as I have irregular cycles it can be hard to realise that my anxiety is worse due to PMT 
I have been looking at quotes and ideas on Pinterest which I want to share.
General motivation:
- The only place success comes before work is in the dictionary (said by Vidal Sassoon apparently)
- You don't have to be good at it, you just have to do it!
- Falling is only failing if you don't get back up
- If the finish line is too far away, don't look at it. Look at your feet as they take the next step.
Emotional eating:
*Whatever the problem is, the answer is not in the fridge
- If hunger is not the problem, eating is not the solution
- When you eat because you feel sad or stressed, you are turning one problem into two
- Food is not therapy
- Eat to fill your stomach not your heart
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It's obviously unrealistic to hope that I shall continue stress free for ever, but I feel that LCHF really works well for me and I see no reason to ever stop
One thing I find reassuring about LCHF is that in extremis you can eat things that would be considered 'naughty' on almost any other woe, and therefore trick yourself into thinking you have indulged. Eating extra thick double cream with a spoon in front of the open fridge door was not my finest hour and of course will slow down loss, but it's better than eating lots of cake or biscuits and still has that comfort eating feel.
Thanks for the link, will check it out 
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