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He vlogged our date!

(183 Posts)
AlsoAlan Mon 08-Apr-19 14:06:11

Hi will try not to make it an essay! NC for this.

So my friend set me up with a guy she knows from her hobby group, chatted a bit online etc and he seemed nice enough so agreed to meet up with him last night. He had previously spoken a lot about how he is really into social media which I'm not really into - we spoke on WhatsaApp but he keeps asking for my Snapchat, Insta etc, he is very into YouTube and kept asking me to subscribe to his channel and watch his top vid which is a Yes Lads reaction video which has around 7000 likes.

So I arrive last night and he is literally filming as I walk in and asks if I'm excited to meet him, how I'm feeling etc. I kind of laugh it off but then am getting increasingly annoyed as he keeps asking for us to take a selfie, messing around that weird dog ear filter thing and the whole time I am trying to chat to him his phone keeps relentlessly pinging. He also wanted to play this weird "20 questions about you" game but said he wouldn't put it online if I dont want it.

So I get home and within literally 5 minutes of him dropping me off he texts me to say "the video" is up on his profile and can I please like and share it??? I go to his profile and he has actually put together a 20 minute video of our date!! You can't really see my face but you can hear me, he says my name several times and my car reg plate is clearly visible at the end. Even worse is that it already has several hundred likes from his "followers" who have shared it to their own Insta accounts etc. He even gave it a title like"xxcVideoGuyWithNoName GOES ON A DATE"!! And he filmed the whole 20 questions thing by hiding his phone behind a menu!

So I guess my AIBU is a. AIBU to be weirded out by this? and b. Is this focus on social media the new norm for dating now??

Foslady Mon 08-Apr-19 14:16:06

Would you like us to unlike it and call him a weird fucking creep who obviously isn’t into dating as no serous woman would want anyone who did this to them.....?
Probably better not to!

bridgetreilly Mon 08-Apr-19 14:17:02

Obviously weird and not normal, but also, it seems pretty obvious that's what he was doing. Did you not ask him about it during the date or tell him you weren't giving him permission to put you online? It doesn't sound like he was being secretive about it.

DestinationPub Mon 08-Apr-19 14:17:28

gamerchick

Or you can get a load of people to go and hand his arse to him so he's forced to delete it

Yep. Tell us the name and we’ll tell him to take it down.

TapasForTwo Mon 08-Apr-19 14:17:29

What everyone else said. TBH I'm struggling to understand why you didn't walk away immediately.

aidelmaidel Mon 08-Apr-19 14:17:52

HELL TO THE NO

RChick Mon 08-Apr-19 14:19:31

Creepy weirdo

evaperonspoodle Mon 08-Apr-19 14:19:52

Is he 13 hmm. Report the vlog, if you feel inclined leave link here and we will do the same. Call this a lucky escape! You could vlog about it

Bringbackthestripes Mon 08-Apr-19 14:21:31

he texts me to say "the video" is up on his profile and can I please like and share it???

How do you respond?
YANBU I would hate to find myself on YouTube/insta. Weird.

mummabubs Mon 08-Apr-19 14:21:45

The more I think about it, it seems like he only ever went on the date to create an event for social media... if he ever dares get back in touch with you maybe reflect that back to him? (The direct him to the consent cup of tea video to educate himself with).

CanuckBC Mon 08-Apr-19 14:23:41

That is weird and not on at all! He has your license plate on there! WTF! I would be complaining and loudly!

Have you spoken to your friend about him? Maybe she didn’t know he was a secret wannabe whatever you want to call him. Just knew him from the hobby and thought he seemed nice. I would hope that anyway!

Damn, this is so creepy! Recorded it behind the menu when you had already said no!

pinkyredrose Mon 08-Apr-19 14:30:02

OP what's his you tube name?

C8H10N4O2 Mon 08-Apr-19 14:32:54

1) Tell him in no uncertain terms to take it down.
2) Report to YouTube as their content producer posting personal information about you without consent and gained by deception in a pressured scenario (he told you he wouldn't use it, he used a situation where most women want to avoid making a fuss).

Do both as you are unlikely to be his first victim or his last.

Also practice being more assertive when dicks like this press you into going along with this crap and make you feel that you are the odd one. I know it isn't easy but practicing can help overcome the conditioning we all have "to be nice" when we are really not comfortable.

pessimisticstateofperception Mon 08-Apr-19 14:33:36

Reply to the video and ask why he cut the part out where he told you about his micro penis and cried mature

What an absolute cunt. I would be furious.

recrudescence Mon 08-Apr-19 14:33:37

I wonder if he gets a lot of second dates.

RockinHippy Mon 08-Apr-19 14:35:41

WTAF shock

He's a narcissistic arse if the highest order - run for the hills & report his ass for the video

Fairyjuice Mon 08-Apr-19 14:37:14

Yes op, post us his username and we'll hand his arse on a plate for you!!

Sometimes I really do despair of this ridiculous social media generation 🙈

lillymunster Mon 08-Apr-19 14:37:39

What an absolute freak. I'm very easy going but this guy is a complete whackjob and sounds about 12. Report the video to whichever outlets it's posted on and say you didn't give your consent and that it has personal details about you like your car reg. I wouldn't put it past this guy to secretly film his date on the toilet and then post that on YouTube

Februaryblooms Mon 08-Apr-19 14:41:51

Wow I don't know how I'd react to that aside being very pissed off confused

Definitely report it as many times as you can.

Like PP's have said, us MNers would be only too happy to give him what for.

Childish idiot confused

NCsally Mon 08-Apr-19 14:42:33

Give us the link and we will all report him for you angry

Mummyoflittledragon Mon 08-Apr-19 14:43:08

Wow! How awful for you. I hope you manage to get the original and all the copies removed.

Belenus Mon 08-Apr-19 14:43:29

If it's a platform such as YouTube, second what PP have said, report it and get them to take it down.

If this doesn't happen, see if the mutual friend can get it taken down. I wouldn't link to it here. It will do two things - one reveal exactly who you are, and 2 get him more hits than he might dream of. He'll keep it up to get the hits and go viral. This will help him get advertising revenue.

If you want help, maybe ask friends you know IRL to post on it. And yes, I'd point out in the comments that it's fucking obvious why he doesn't have a girlfriend.

Thisnamechanger Mon 08-Apr-19 14:48:04

Yes op, post us his username and we'll hand his arse on a plate for you!!

This.
<<rolls up sleeves>>

EarlyWarning Mon 08-Apr-19 14:48:32

That's just horrible. Report him. Just horrible

bagpiss Mon 08-Apr-19 14:48:56

I'd be utterly horrified if this had happened to me and don't think yabu at all. He would certainly not be getting another date, if I was brave enough I'd make my own vlog about a how I'd had really really shit date with him. 😂

Belenus Mon 08-Apr-19 14:51:55

This. <<rolls up sleeves>>

Bad idea. He'll go viral, or at least get a lot of hits. There's no such thing as bad publicity.

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