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Soft - and sneaky - zilla

(609 Posts)
Unreasonableunreasonableness Fri 22-Jun-18 16:17:03

So at group today she tried to do the same as last week. As soon as party mum lived away from me there she was. This week tho we'd decided that party mum would just come back to me when she wanted (and group leader was waiting to ask her to leave if she followed). Whenever she was with me softzilla stayed away, but as soon as she left my side there she'd be. Softzilla left early as has become normal.
Unfortunately the group is a church group. Tho group leader runs the group technically the vicar oversees. And he had said that until softzilla does something wrong AT GROUP he doesn't want them to get involved.
However, in a possibly slightly more sinister turn, me and party mum decided to go Aldi on the way home. It could be a coincidence but when we turned an aisle there was softzilla. Every time we turned an aisle. When we went to the tills she joined the line next to us. And when we got out she'd parked right next to my car too. She didn't acknowledge us but was just there. It could be a coincidence but she has been VERY vocal in the past about not shopping there (wouldn't ever fed her DC cheap food! She'd only feed them quality.)
I know it seems like nothing but I'm glad party mum was there and feel like I'll be looking over my shoulder again. Police? Or still too minor? She didn't approach and it could have been a coincidence.

Stephisaur Fri 22-Jun-18 16:19:51

Given that she has previously said she would never shop there, I would log it with the police.

She’s starting to sound a bit stalkery now!

LeighaJ Fri 22-Jun-18 16:20:07

There are no coincidences in stalking behaviour. In my experience at least.

ReanimatedSGB Fri 22-Jun-18 16:20:37

It could be a coincidence that you were both in Aldi - but the fact that she then followed you round the store rather than fucking off and staying away indicates that she's still trying to unsettle and harass you. Sorry you are having to put up with it.

CuriousaboutSamphire Fri 22-Jun-18 16:21:51

Keep a diary... coincidences that mount up become stalking and therefore reportable!

Of course you could ask party mum to cry at her.... "Stop following me, you are scaring me" - real tears if possible!

Unreasonableunreasonableness Fri 22-Jun-18 16:21:54

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/3212527-For-not-paying-even-though-I-invited

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/3231021-Softzilla-returns-to-soft-play

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/3264707-Softzilla-the-police?pg=6&order=

DarlingNikita Fri 22-Jun-18 16:22:33

I'd log it on the grounds that you know it's out of character for her to shop there.

sexnotgender Fri 22-Jun-18 16:23:49

She's a fucking loon, you're doing so well ignoring the crazy bitch.

Honestly I'd try and ignore this just now and really hope she gets bored of being an arsehole soon.

flumposie Fri 22-Jun-18 16:24:24

I don't believe this was a coincidence. She knows what she's doing to you.

MrsMrsMrsMrs Fri 22-Jun-18 16:27:14

If her car was parked after you parked there AND she left before you then it’s almost like she left, but then followed you, which still sounds very stalkerish.
I’m so glad Party Mum was with you. What a very odd woman. Was there no growling OP? It would’ve added to the craziness if she’d come around the aisle growling like Marge Simpson...
It won’t hurt to log it imho.

SoddingUnicorns Fri 22-Jun-18 16:27:19

Wow she is an absolute roaster isn’t she?

What’s wrong with Aldi?

If you’ve got a previous case number for SZ I would call the local station quoting that number and report what happened today, that’s pretty inflammatory and deliberately harassing you. Not the shopping bit, but the following you around and parking right next to you. In context with her previous behaviour it could build a case if needed.

LakieLady Fri 22-Jun-18 16:27:32

Christ almighty, this woman has some bloody nerve.

I'd let the police know. And I'd try and park in between 2 cars that are already there in future.

She is really weird.

aaaaargghhhhelpme Fri 22-Jun-18 16:28:03

It’s not a coincidence.

And even if it was. You’re on a police warning to stay the fuck away from someone and you accidentally bump into them in a shop - you get the hell out of there as soon as possible.

I’m assuming she knows what car you have too so parking alongside is also non coincidental.

Police all the way. I’m sorry she’s being like this. And I’m surprised the group even with police involvement don’t want to get involved

Lizzie48 Fri 22-Jun-18 16:31:09

Definitely not a coincidence, Softzilla is clearly doing all she can to unsettle you. Police all the way. I also can't believe the vicar is saying not to ban her, when the Police have told her to stay from you.

aaaaargghhhhelpme Fri 22-Jun-18 16:31:43

I think she thinks she’s being clever. She can still get her kicks by doing this but not actually breaking any rules. She’s following police instructions right - she’s not actually approached you. And it’s worked as you’re doubting whether it counts so you might not report it.

She’s a lunatic. And she’s lost all sense of perspective. I’d be on the phone to your police person right now.

Lizzie48 Fri 22-Jun-18 16:36:22

If she's trying to isolate you from Party Friend, she's definitely not succeeding. She's just making herself look like a loon, and PM clearly wants nothing to do with her.

TaighNamGastaOrt Fri 22-Jun-18 16:40:07

so sorry OP, she thinks shes being clever doesnt she?
I can't believe she's still trying to unsettle you, theres something very wrong with her.
Agree with PP, speak to your local police again, parking right next to you is a deliberate act and following you round the store is stalking.

cjt110 Fri 22-Jun-18 16:40:47

Is this the woman who said you should pay because you asked her and her kids along to soft play? Sorry, Im being naughty and haven't read the other links you posted which I assume are updates but if it's gone from post 1 of her saying you should pay to this then I'd be quite concerned about her behaviour.

CatsCatsCats11 Fri 22-Jun-18 16:41:21

She's so creepy, I'd log with the police might only been minor but it could all build to a bigger case?

Willow2017 Fri 22-Jun-18 16:44:17

She knows exactly what she is doing. The fact that she is leaving early is actually worrying as it could be that she is watcing where you go? And the fact she rocked up at your supermarket could confirm this.
I would keep a diary of it all, but give your contact at the police the heads up. They probably have seen it all before and know how things escalate and if you have a lot of this type of thing they can go back to her and have another chat with her.

She is sticking 2 fingers up to you and the police by playing as close to the knuckle as she can get away with.

Dont let her see you rattled, maybe you should have started to follow her around the supermarket so she had to keep moving away from you she would have got fed up with that and if she hadnt moved you could have said in a slightly louder voice than normal, "Wasnt the police warning to stay the hell away from me clear enough for you SZ? You told everyone you never shopped in Aldi, why are you here following me around again?"
(But you are obviously smarter and more chilled than me and ignored her. I would have had enough by now and cracked.. smile)

But PM needs to tell her to back off at the group, tell her she isnt up for the same treatment as she gave you and doesnt want to be her new bff or this will continue ad nauseum and spoil PMs enjoyment of the group. She really isnt interested in PM as a friend other than to get to you.

BoomBoomsCousin Fri 22-Jun-18 16:47:31

I would call the officers who spoke to her the first time and tell them what happened at group last week and this and then about Aldi. It’s not coincidence, it’s a deliberate attempt by her to harass you.

On the group front, SZ is doing something wrong at group. She’s already harassed you there trying to make you go outside and has been harassing party mum for the last two weeks. If can’t be any fun for party mum to know she’s being deliberately shadowed by SZ anytime she’s not standing with you.

Cagliostro Fri 22-Jun-18 16:51:34

I’d log that given she’s been so vocally snobby about not shopping there. So unsettling sad

MsPavlichenko Fri 22-Jun-18 16:52:37

Don't you engage at any level as she will clearly tell the police if they need to speak to her again. Or off her own bat even.

Definitely log this with them . She is still stalking albeit not directly.

JurassicDoris Fri 22-Jun-18 16:54:54

Maybe she was expecting you to pay for her shopping?

Nikephorus Fri 22-Jun-18 16:59:02

Jurassic grin

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