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To be annoyed at Oh wanking?

(175 Posts)
Missmackenzie89 Sat 26-Aug-17 15:40:03

Long time lurker but first time posting. Live with my boyfriend of 10 months, no children yet.

We've discussed wanking in the past, I know it's a normal part of life and I know he does it it's normal, but I have previously said that i would find it weird if i was in the bed when he did it (as in if I wasn't involved in the act lol).

Well this morning was the second morning just this week that I have been woken up by him pleasuring himself. Both times I had no idea how to react, I didn't want to embarrass him, and I genuinely didn't know whether to say anything. I don't really appreciate being woken up at 6.30 on a Saturday morning by the bed shaking and heavy breathing... We have an active sex life and although it's aunt flow week he's had plenty of other action, and we had full intercourse just on Thursday so he's not "deprived". I don't know whether to say anything to him or just pretend i don't know but I'm a bit annoyed to be honest. Especially because I have said in the past that I don't like the idea of him doing it while I'm in bed, the way I look it as it's either private or a joint effort not somewhere in between.

ChoudeBruxelles Sat 26-Aug-17 15:43:59

I'd be pissed off being woken up by dh wanking. I'd tell him to pack in waking me up or I'd be too tired for sex

Ecadia Sat 26-Aug-17 15:45:11

Can't he go elsewhere if he really needs to do it. I'd be raging if i woke up to that.

FallingOrbit Sat 26-Aug-17 15:49:35

I was ready to come in here and give you both barrels until I read the full post! I was going to rant incessantly about how wanking is normal and nothing wrong with it etc..... but what you're describing is a little unusual!

I'm trying to reverse the situation (cos I'm a bloke) in my head and my initial feelings are that if my GF was waking me up bashing her self silly with her BOB I'd probably be a bit like.... "Why didn't you wake me if you were horny! I'd have been happy to help!!!"

I don't think I'd be too annoyed by it, maybe she would let me watch! Especially as you're saying you have a very active sex life. You sure he was awake? I've woken up many a morning with a spectacular boner in my hand! My own that is smile

chips4teaplease Sat 26-Aug-17 15:53:21

we had full intercourse just on Thursday
Would he like 'full intercourse' more often, or is he just happy to have a wank? Tbh, if someone said I couldn't have a wank when I wanted, I wouldn't be pleased. It's Saturday, by the way. What sex have you done together between the 'full' on Thursday and the Saturday morning wank?

Ecadia Sat 26-Aug-17 15:55:03

She hasn't got a problem with him wanking. She has a problem waking up to him doing it NEXT to her in the bed

Ttbb Sat 26-Aug-17 15:58:37

Well if he's waking you up that's just jean isn't it? O would just tell him to do it elsewhere.

StillDrivingMeBonkers Sat 26-Aug-17 16:01:12

aunt flow week

casts eye upwards

Bahhhhhumbug Sat 26-Aug-17 16:02:46

"Felling" 'My own that is ' grin This would annoy me too and my DH has never done this but l am sure he does so in private. Very inconsiderate and selfish wyre not go to the bathroom / downstairs / whatever.

PurpleMinionMummy Sat 26-Aug-17 16:02:50

More often? It's saturday fgs. Not like he's been left weeks hmm

Huffletuff Sat 26-Aug-17 16:02:59

Don't see a problem him doing it next to you in the bed. We often do that if the other is asleep. I'd have a problem with it waking me up though.

PurpleMinionMummy Sat 26-Aug-17 16:03:46

No that that would matter either

Somerford Sat 26-Aug-17 16:04:10

I'm with you, OP. Not a nice way to be woken up and he can go to another room to do that. I don't want to get into the minutiae of the subject but you're not asking him to stop doing something he wants to do or deprive himself in anyway. You're asking him to go out of his way very slightly and be considerate. Perfectly reasonable.

scottishdiem Sat 26-Aug-17 16:07:18

So he is waking up with a morning glory and deciding to deal with it.

You can complain about being woken up I suppose but not that he is pleasuring himself even though you think enough sexual activity is currently taking place.

WineAndTiramisu Sat 26-Aug-17 16:14:06

I'd be pissed off about being woken up by it that early at the weekend!

thesleepystorm Sat 26-Aug-17 16:15:40

It's Saturday, by the way. What sex have you done together between the 'full' on Thursday and the Saturday morning wank?

How is that relevant confused

Circumlocutor Sat 26-Aug-17 16:17:41

Lots of fluidy threads about today.

JulietNeverMetRomeo Sat 26-Aug-17 16:21:27

I would be furious if I woke up to that. I wouldn't have an issue with my OH pleasuring themselves in another room but I find waking you up disrespectful, especially as you've said you don't want him doing it whilst you are in bed. I would sit him down and have a chat about it.

PovertyPain Sat 26-Aug-17 16:21:41

Noticed that circumloc.

Pengggwn Sat 26-Aug-17 16:23:12

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Missmackenzie89 Sat 26-Aug-17 16:28:00

Chips4teapleaae - really? Bedtime Thursday to Saturday morning 6.30am? We only went 36 hours without? Doesn't seem a long wait.. maybe my sex life isn't as active as I thought

VinoTime Sat 26-Aug-17 16:28:00

hmm chips the OP has her period. Some couples may be okay with period sex, but others are not. And any person who cannot possibly last until Saturday without an orgasm, having had intercourse on Thursday, has a serious problem with control, imo.

If the OP has said she doesn't like him jacking off in bed next to her, then her DP needs to be respectful of that and go elsewhere. She isn't saying don't do it, she's saying please do it somewhere else. It's a perfectly acceptable request and to ignore it shows a disregard for her feelings. Frankly, I'd be pissed off at being woken up that way on a Saturday morning too, especially if I had previously told him I didn't like it.

Sallystyle Sat 26-Aug-17 16:29:11

I wouldn't stand for my husband wanking off when I'm hypothetically sleeping in our bed.

We don't have this problem because we have separate rooms but when we did share a room he wouldn't do it and certainly not when he knows I have a problem with it.

I would find it hugely disrespectful. Some couples are fine with it, but if one half isn't then it needs to stop.

wotabastard Sat 26-Aug-17 16:30:48

I wouldn't like it and I'm all for more wanking. It's a private thing unless mutually agreed.

DameDiazepamTheDramaQueen Sat 26-Aug-17 16:30:49

It's Saturday, by the way. What sex have you done together between the 'full' on Thursday and the Saturday morning wank?

Are you suggesting that's not enough?

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