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Which toilets a F to M transgender student should use

(192 Posts)
WongaDotMom Thu 18-Oct-12 17:27:48

DH teaches at an FE college. One of his new students this year is transgender (female to male)
All staff and students are aware of his transgender status. (Not sure about any ops or medications, will ask DH when he gets home)

The student wishes to use the male toilets. Staff had a meeting regarding this issue, trying to avoid any issues with the male students using the toilets at the same time, and decided that the student should NOT use the male toilets, but allocated him use of the disabled toilet instead.

He was offended by this suggestion, as he does not have a disability, and is taking a stance by walking the 10 minute journey to public toilets in town where he can use the male facilities without discrimination.

I think the college should allow him use of the male facilities, DH disagrees, so I am putting it out for the MN jury to decide.

Who is BU?

iMum Thu 18-Oct-12 17:29:16


tnh id have no qualms using the mens loo in an emergency

GeordieCherry Thu 18-Oct-12 17:29:55

He identifies as male so should be allowed to use the male toilets. He's right, he doesn't have a disability. Hope it works out soon

threesocksonathreeleggedwitch Thu 18-Oct-12 17:30:16

well I don't think he should use the disabled toilets as he isn't disabled.
so I suppose the male ones imo so yanbu

cakeandcava Thu 18-Oct-12 17:30:29

The college is being VVU. I agree with you -the student should be allowed to use the male toilets -he identifies as male, he is male. What exactly is their problem?

kittyandthegoldenfontanelles Thu 18-Oct-12 17:31:13

The one which makes him feel most comfortable.

Sirzy Thu 18-Oct-12 17:31:24

I think if he is living as a male then he should be able to use the male facilities.

I was uncomfortable when a Male to female transgender colleague was getting changed in the communal changing room when I was at work once but that was MY problem not hers (in my defence I was only young, now it wouldn't bother me at all)

squoosh Thu 18-Oct-12 17:31:26

He should be able to use the male toilets. Presumably no surgery has yet taken place so still needs to use a cubicle to pee. I don't see why anyone else would be offended.

We have unisex toilets where I work and it works just fine.

ordinarygull Thu 18-Oct-12 17:32:23

I had a friend who was pre op male to female, and when we went out she always went in the ladies, although she told me that strictly speaking she was by law still male and should have used the gents.

I think the college should allow him use of the gents - if he's pre op he'll be in a cubicle anyway, not using the urinals I imagine!

Not really something that people need to get bothered about is it?

chrisrobin Thu 18-Oct-12 17:32:45

He should be allowed to use the Male toilet. I can't really see why the college would have a problem with it tbh.

IneedAsockamnesty Thu 18-Oct-12 17:36:00

im pretty sure that if he is living as a man then he is legally protected and as such has the legal right to use male facilities such as loo's.

kim147 Thu 18-Oct-12 17:41:03

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

ZombTEE Thu 18-Oct-12 17:42:20

Male toilets. He is a man.

This shouldn't even be an issue in 2012. It makes me ill that there's even a question about it.

Pickles101 Thu 18-Oct-12 17:43:41

Agree with everyone else, he should be allowed to use the mens loos.

Petsinmyputridpudenda Thu 18-Oct-12 17:44:35

Male. And it really shouldn't be a meeting worthy issue in this day and age hmm

FolkGhoul Thu 18-Oct-12 17:44:41

Male toilets FFS!

Blimey, they had a meeting about this?!

MrsTerryPratchett Thu 18-Oct-12 17:45:29

Whichever ones he chooses. In this case male.

Why we don't have unisex toilets, I'll never know. Wherever they've had them, it's worked for me.

WelshMaenad Thu 18-Oct-12 17:47:22

I don't blame him for making a stand. The college are being VVVU and discriminatory,

xkcdfangirl Thu 18-Oct-12 17:47:39

From a discrimination legisation point of view, this is exactly equivalent to making a gay male student use the disabled loos because straight men didn't feel comfortable sharing the facilities with him. It is sickeningly offensive and he is quite right to be objecting - he should be sueing the bastards.

Petsinmyputridpudenda Thu 18-Oct-12 17:48:49

Indeed welsh, I would of been screaming discrimination and encouraging him to sue if I knew him. Poor guy

SelfRighteousPrissyPants Thu 18-Oct-12 17:49:12

I knew someone who was F-M and used the womens as he didn't want to make people uncomfortable but but was supposed to use the mens as you have to live like a man pre-op.

DunderMifflin Thu 18-Oct-12 17:49:23

Male - you'd think a college would be more forward thinking about this! On what grounds are the men objecting?

Hesterton Thu 18-Oct-12 17:49:47

Unisex toilets are the way forward. Really you can't catch pregnancy, bass voices, STIs, tits or beards from sharing facilities.

JasperStreet Thu 18-Oct-12 17:51:31

Poor thing, I hope the issue gets resolved soon. He should use whichever toilets he wants.

shewhowines Thu 18-Oct-12 17:54:59


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