Return to Office policy will make it impossible for me to work!

[SamSam786R]

I started my job four years ago under a hybrid policy, although my contract stated it was 9-5, Mon-Fri. In these four years I have managed to work from home and office with a degree of flexibility. After I got pregnant with my third child and returned from mat leave in April 2025 things changed drastically. They tried to remove all flexibilty that I had (rigid 9-5 working hours when I had worked reduced hours in the office and made the time up in the evenings). I've subjected to nasty comments like 'You have baby brain' and 'your performance has suffered since you got pregnant'. Now I must juggle two pick ups (kids and nursery) the school doesnt offer afterschool provision and I cannot move them. My child is settled in nursery but the 9-5 hours wont allow me to pick him up on time - I'm alrrady stressed and sick at the thought of being late to pick up and work. For me to return to the office five days is impossible and extra nursery days and hours plus additonal travel would put me at a loss of ~£600. Going part time would also leave me at a loss because I'd still be paying the same in bills and childcare costs. I feel like I have no choice but to leave once this policy comes into action but there are male colleagues of mine who are: able to work one day a week due to relocations, have manged to negotiate late starts so they can go to the gym, not to mention our HR person (also male) comes into work after me most days and does not even come inot the office regularly himself. I feel like they are pushing me out. Please note my manager is based abroad and I work in comms - similar roles I have done fully remote. This was along the lines of what they emailed us: "Over the past five years the business has operated a discretionary hybrid working trial. This trial was a temporary, non-contractual arrangement and Following a comprehensive review of our operational needs and performance targets, the business has made the strategic decision to formally conclude this trial."

Just to correct an assumption here, as I’ve seen it more than once on this thread. If your employment contract says your place of work is the office, it doesn’t matter how long you have been working on a hybrid basis - the employer is entitled to insist on the contractual term and make you come back to the office. People throw around the term “custom and practice” but custom and practice potentially gives you an implied term in your contract, which can be overridden by an express term (i.e. the one saying your place of work is the office). That of course does not stop you from putting in a flexible working request asking to work on a hybrid basis, citing the fact that you have been doing so successfully for several years.

It’s not the same productivity is it though, going on school run, having kids asking for snacks, telling you about their day, look at this mum every 5 mins. It shouldn’t be allowed at all as there’s no way someone with young kids around is as productive as someone who doesn’t. No way I could have done my job properly with my kids around. Hence I paid for after school and holiday child care.

People working with kids at home is at least 50% of the reason employers are hauling everyone back into the office. It’s a piss take, and yes, people can always tell.

Just pay for childcare like everyone else.

And what happened to the lawyer from Google who saw the letters from HR and confirmed you have a case?

Childcare here stops at 5:30. If I go to the office I wont be back until 8pm, I also need to leave at 7am and breakfast club doesn't open at 7:30. If I WFH I am working 9-5 it just means I'm here for pick up.

This is 100% correct.

One thing though-the rub is in your last sentence. Will the OP be truthfully able to say that she has been working successfully for several years.

As I said, earlier, she needs to give serious thought about whether or not there is any truth in their comments which say she hasn't.

I cannot see why they would comment negatively on her work, if she was a top notch employee that they were glad to have and didn't want to risk losing. Of course, that doesn't mean that they might be lying for a reason that isn't apparent to me.

If she hasn't, then she needs to address this straight away in order to make them look kindly on her request.

I completely agree with you but so many posters on mumsnet are unable to do basic addition and just default to the “oh you must be working with kids at home”. No I’m not, I have childcare for my full working hours, but nursery is 8-6, if I am in the office 9-5.30 with a 1.5 hour commute each way that simply doesn’t add up.

There is research that shows people are more productive when they have choice where to work though. So obviously it doesn't work for every job but to say people are unproductive when WFH simply isn't true. It smacks of desperation from an 'old guard' who ringfenced working practices to suit their own situation and networks.

That's great that you don't work with children at home, but it's not the situation in my own organisation (lots of people never available at school run time; noise of children on calls etc.)

It's nothing to do with basic addition and more to do with people's own experience of colleagues who do work with children at home.

Not whilst also looking after three children.

A) I’d argue a 1.5h commute each way is something you just need to accept is unrealistic with small kids. You need to look for a job that is closer.

B) What’s your DH’s contribution to the childcare drop off / pick up schedule?

The assumption on these threads is always that the OP wants to work from home with kids present. IME that is very rarely the case.

Some jobs work best if everyone attends the workplace.
Some jobs work well with a hybrid arrangement.
Some jobs needs everyone to work specific hours.
Some jobs can be sensibly worked on a more flexible basis.
Some jobs can be carried out on a fully remote basis without any loss of productivity

Every job and situation is different. Blanket statements (whatever side of the argument you are on) don't help anyone. It's as "desparate" to insist that jobs can be done as wfh on a fully flexible basis as it is to insist they must be done between 9-5 in the office.

Why should I be forced out of my job because my employer is unwilling to make reasonable adjustments for my childcare responsibilities? This is not compliant with the equality act.

My husband does half the drop offs and pick ups, that still leaves me to do the other half, which is not possible with those hours in the office. Besides that, it is an accepted fact at tribunal that women still carry the bulk of childcare responsibilities.

Could a childminder do some pick ups drop offs for you or is your partner able to work flexibly to help?

Your contract is in the office, even if you work from home you may still be working not doing the school run or supervising children. Many if not most employers know that staff are not as productive at home, my dh brought his whole team back in in 2021 because it doesn’t work, a few people did manage wfh well but others didn’t, and guess who left once they all had to come back to the office? The unproductive ones

People might have done worked in the office 5 years ago and managed. But we are in a major cost of living crisis, and wage inflation hasn’t kept pace with rising costs. People have a lot less money to spend on childcare. I was spending over £700 per month on nursery fees when my children were little; pre-covid. I couldn’t afford that now.

Yes, when children are really small then I can’t see how wfh would work without other arrangements in place, but when they are older I can’t see a problem with it.

And as someone further down the thread has said, I get more done at home than the days when I go in the office. There’s actually less distraction at work, I do t have the interruption of a commute and struggle to find a parking space, and I’m able to resolve problems more effectively, think outside the box more and get more done.

Times have moved on but some employers clearly view their employees with suspicion and don’t trust them. If I didn’t work when I’m supposed to be wfh, it would be blindingly obvious to my employer.

I wonder if your experience is particular to your job/industry though? IME it's incredibly common for people to work at home without childcare in place, and the number of childcarers (nurseries, childminders, after school clubs etc) closing or reducing capacity due to lack of numbers (beyond that that can be attributed to other factors like falling birth rate) would seem to bear out that very many people do do this.

There are no jobs at closer distance and we can't afford a house nearer London. Luckily my work is incredibly flexible otherwise I'd be another woman forced out of professional work. DH works part time and compresses his hours. His work is also very flexible and he does 50% of pick ups/drop offs.

You took a job with a commute that’s unrealistic, why not seek work closer to home

You say that as if it’s so easy 🙄

How on earth would you know what productivity levels businesses are dealing with? 😂

There are huge national and international panel surveys on this, employer surveys, huge research teams, massive (tens of millions of pounds) grants on studying this.

Are you a single mum? I didn’t see any mention of the dad, maybe I missed it.
You sound very entitled OP. You sound like you are fitting work around your children and expect work to be infinitely flexible to your needs. Your employer is running a business and needs full productivity - not someone WFH whilst looking after young children.