Hr meeting over a comment

[HRHooha]

(Not racist discrimination et cetera in any way.) If you went into the meeting and pretended to just not remember the comment, as it's only a first level meeting, where could they go from that?

Are there multiple people to confirm you said the comment? Did it start a debate or discussion? Harder to deny it if so.

They would investigate and ask witnesses etc. Your lack of accountability and self-awareness will likely be a factor in their decision making as well, to your detriment. It's best to be honest.

There isn’t the same burden of proof as in criminal law. In terms of employment law you just need to have “reasonable belief” that someone did, or said something and it’s needs to be backed up by evidence. Your best best would be to admit what you said and show remorse.

Guess it depends how bad the comment is too?

I think it would be worse to pretend you don’t remember saying it. It caused offence to someone ( even if you didn’t mean it to) and acknowledging that has to be better than it appearing so ingrained you don’t remember saying it

What did you say OP? Can’t really give advice without knowing.

Yes- best to admit what you’ve said to avoid an investigation and maybe provide context if it’s something you think has been misconstrued. DO take accountability and apologise. It’s hard without knowing the comment, but ultimately whatever you have said has caused offence to someone and that’s what you need to apologise for.

Yes you can! That’s just nosy.

And yes, it’s so much better to own it. We’ve all said things unthinkingly and admitting that and apologising for it is better.

Oh, it's really not offensive. It's just a comment about work policy.

Interesting about the burden of proof. Thank you. I think it's really ridiculous and petty,

You’d look as stupid and evasive as that woman who worked for Rebekah Vardy and said her phone had accidentally fallen in the sea.

But also, I feel I'm not gonna do their job for them and fall on my sword.

If they say "you said the sky is red and everyone knows that's not the case". I'll say "oh did I? I don't have any recollection of saying that."

(It was several weeks ago.)

@HotCrossBunplease why do you say that?

I assume you were criticising a policy, in which case I'm not sure how saying you don't recall the comment is going to work.

"HRhooha, you were heard saying 'it's crap that they're making us go into the office three days a week."
HRhooha: "What? I don't remember saying that. I love going into the office!"

Lol

Is there a typo in what you're planning to say?

No, I wouldn't qualify. I'd just say I don't remember saying that.

To what end? If they know you said it and they know you said it that’s the burden of proof. This isn’t a court of law. It’s probability based. The outcome will only be different in that your approach makes you look obstinate.

What did you actually say though? And how many people can testify that you said it?

I don't know. A couple of people. They haven't told me who's complained and I know they won't.

It's not a written meeting or formal one. Just words of advice.

But I wouldn't be obstinate because I really wouldn't remember

But you do remember. So you are being obstinate. They also don’t need you to remember.

How long have you been there?

Depends what policy you criticised.
Inclusion and diversity? You have a problem on your hands, for example.

I reckon you do know there’s some level of offence caused else you would say what it was and wouldn’t pretend to not remember it.

You won’t be able to avoid an explanation unless you want to look really silly. There will obviously be at least one witness. Sometimes it’s best to keep thoughts to oneself in the workplace.