Hr meeting over a comment

[HRHooha]

(Not racist discrimination et cetera in any way.) If you went into the meeting and pretended to just not remember the comment, as it's only a first level meeting, where could they go from that?

As you remember what you said, why deny you remember saying it? If it's something you believe in, then why not have the courage of your conviction.

"@HRHooha you are reported to have said the company policy on home working is inflexible"

"I don't remember saying those exact words, but I do feel the homeworking policy nowadays need to be reviewed. I'm sorry if it came across negatively and I'll bear that in mind in future".

youd get a lot more respect by owning your action. Does your organisation operate on a culture of fear that you can't talk openly about things that bother you?

I think you would look like a child to do this. I would just offer to reflect on it.

Depends if witnesses.
Id be surprised if any action was taken over you commenting on a policy.
You are entitled to your opinions on matters.
Depends how you made the comment though, like if you swore. Or if you refused to follow it.
But saying I don’t agree with X is perfectly usual in work environments.
I think they’d only investigate or take action if you were talking about a protected characteristic. For instance criticizing a policy regarding a Disability for example.

Do you want to stay in the job with a good reputation and amiable relationship? Because if you do, then by far your best bet is to own your comment and say why you think as you do. Acknowledge that you shouldn't have criticised the policy in the way you did as it was unprofessional, you should have raised your objection through the proper channels. Pretending not to remember or being otherwise obstructive puts you squarely in the wrong, as you will appear dishonest and difficult, whereas at this point, you have the opportunity to put your side. Obviously if you believe you're being set up by an emloyer who wants the opportunity to sanction you because they don't value you, then you're in a different boat and I'd consult ACAS if you're not in a union. If they have witnesses that's enough whatever you say or don't say.

As long as your faking it face is good enough, I'd stick to it. Never incriminate yourself. Is there a union rep you can speak to?

I once got told by my manager that they needed 'a word' with me. They said I'd upset someone but they wouldn't tell me who, why, when, or any other detail that would have been helpful. (Yes, my manager was generally particularly useless.)
I genuinely didn't remember. So told her I couldn't change anything if I didn't know what it was about, but I would try not to do it again... whatever 'it' was 😂

Is it a case of someone telling tales to management about something you said? In that case I'd act all surprised and say something like I didn't realise we weren't allowed to discuss something like that.
As other people have said there'd be a queue of people outside HR all day if everyone who criticised the workplace was brought into a meeting. Let us know how you get on.

As others have said it maybe best to say I don't remember saying that but if I did - what is the issue? Then they can update you with company policy or why they believe it to be inappropriate.

-Take a union rep with you. Even an informal meeting is something that can be used lasted if things progress- so don’t go alone and end up blindsided.
-ask in email before hand what the meeting is about and issue is- so you get it all in writing.
-Get meeting minuted by your rep/HR - make sure it’s accurate and you agree it as likeness of email afterwards.
-ask them what policy has been broken by expressing an opinion?
(that depends on the situation, what was said)- your rep would probs ask what the meetings all about.

Unless you’ve got a really bad, offensive attitude- this sounds a bit heavy handed. And I’d just take my rep in so they know they can’t threaten people- especially if it’s just that their ego is hurt when someone points out a flaw in their policy- it happens.

It entirely depends on what evidence they have of you saying it and what happened at the time.
If one person says you said it casually and everything carried on as normal, saying you don't remember might be fine.
If 20 people maintain you said it and you were immediately pulled up on it and castigated by the whole group, you'll look like an idiot if you say you don't remember.

I have been the decision maker in a lot of these types of scenarios, the ones that go well are those where the person is honest. Do you really think they will believe you forgot complaining about a policy you don't agree with? It would also make me think what else does she say that she's hiding? Much better for your professional reputation and integrity to say yes I did say x because I think y process is inefficient and it would be beneficial to the business if we did Z. Depending on the organisation you might then need to agree that ideas to change policies are best brought to the appropriate forum rather than moaned about in the office.

If I were you I'd
A) stand by what I said. Yes I did say it's pointless filling out this piece of information in three places and I think the system needs to be streamlined. Can you help me understand why this is a HR issue?
B) bring a union rep to witness the meeting to make notes.

If it's just words of advice then they might do all the talking so you just have to listen and not need to admit anything. Is there a way you could turn it into a constructive discussion about the policy you disagree with to see if there is any room for manoeuvre on it? It sounds like you didn't phrase what you said constructively last time but there might be a better way of talking about it. Do you have examples from other companies that have a better policy on it?

Surely if you say "I don't remember saying that" that leaves the door wide open for them to say "and you also called your boss a fat slag", and you can't then say "oh I do remember actually and I didn't say that at all"!

You don’t need to self incriminate they know you did it.

Everyone knows “I don’t remember” is the line of the guilty.

Exactly. What she said is either so benign that it will be easy for her to defend and will give her an opportunity to provide constructive feedback on a new policy/process to enable it to be improved, or it's something bad enough for her to be this reluctant to own up.

As she refers to speaking about it to more than one person, they will take her claim of not remembering what she said as obstructive and dishonest.

It’s also absolutely the next step. Start adding in things they didn’t say and watch the tune change.

I think that's the best approach if it wasn't something very bad just apologise and say you can't remember.

Exactly this. Much easier to just say "yes I did say that but I don't understand how it's a problem?" And get them to explain. Unless you're starting a revolution, a criticism of a work policy is a matter of personal opinion and if you're not allowed an opinion well then...

Denying all knowledge of saying it is childish and a bit pathetic. And obvious.

As others have said, if you feel strongly enough about a policy to complain about it to a colleague then why on earth would you not speak up?!
I feel there is more to this personally.

My father used to interrogate terrorists for a job. His advice was to never admit to anything ever. No big fabricated lies. Just, ‘I don’t recall’ etc. He said those ones were the hardest to crack.

Why not?

I presume these are human beings who have plenty of other things to be doing for the benefit of both the business and other employees so why are you intentionally making their job more difficult than it needs to be?

You now think admitting it would be "incriminating" which is inconsistent with the comment being harmless.

If it's something that was meant harmlessly, but now someone else has shown how it could be construed badly, then that's the angle I'd take.

Maybe there are a handful of very strange employers who would risk fabricating statements from employees just to catch one out.

Seems extremely far fetched though.

If this was a formal disciplinary meeting, HR would be legally obliged to inform OP of that, and then she would have the "right to be accompanied" (by a colleague, trade union representative, or TU official). OP has not been informed of it being a disciplinary meeting, but that HR want to give her "words of advice" so she has no "right to be accompanied".