Coworker snapped at the dress I'm wearing

[user1471867483]

I’m wearing a three-quarter length thin white crepe fabric sleeved dress with black ric rac at the bottom. It’s quite sheer, but it’s lined and I’m fine wearing it. It’s boho and vintage. I have thick black tights on with it and black ankle boots. My coworker, who works next door, came in and said, “Aren’t you cold in that”? I said, “No, I’m fine”. She said, “No you’re not”.
Well, I am! I wouldn’t have worn it if I wasn’t OK in it.
The dress is a bit like this:
https://froufroufrocksboutique.com/products/ent-ecru-plus-ric-rac-midi-dress
What I’m really asking is why has what I’m wearing got anything to do with anyone?

I'm sorry you haven't recieved responses. I think there are some topics where people feel they can't comment because they're out of their depth. Whereas the world and its dog tends to feel qualified to comment on women's clothing choices.

And mine.

Although I have never regarded it as passive aggressive.

urgh.

Op it appears a lot of posters are privy to your workplace dress code. Have you accidentally revealed your employers name and is their handbook online for public viewing?

You might want to ask mnhq to delete this thread as you have obviously revealed too much info somehow.

Folksie, artisan and out there? You'd drive me potty tbh

Yet, you chose to be ageist about it? Shame on you.

I'd rather someone in that than the leggings and crop tops that the girls wear in my office. A dress and tights versus barely there gym wear-I know which looks more professional.
As long as you aren't breaking any dress code your're golden op, crack on

In the 90's when supposedly office wear was all conservative, we all used to wear check short skirts with tights and heels, nothing modest at all. This is fine to me, if you have tights on, and unless you are going into court as a lawyer, I can't see it as any different. Those tiny skirts are back in fashion, perhaps mumsnetters will have to have a lie down!

I manage a team in a call centre , dress code is super relaxed, not much you can't wear . Ignore her, it's a great dress. Wear what you like ! . There are people where I work who criticise and moan about other people's clothes .. life is too short

Yeah, I've had a manager who lacked candour and was overly friendly with the team and she'd ask if they were cold or even going on a date after work when really she was, um, skirting around their inappropriate clothing for work.

I also think it looks too sheer and the wrong cut for an office, sorry OP. 200 denier tights or not.

I love the idea of 60's dresses, a different boho aesthetic on other days, vintage stuff as well. Young people are often identical clones, you are not, this is great.

Op it appears a lot of posters are privy to your workplace dress code.

OP says everybody but 2 people dress in an 'old-fashioned' way. Official dresscode or not, but does not sound like a workplace where it is generally considered appropriate to walk around in whatever and 'bring your whole self'.

You're wearing a summer dress in October and she wonders if you're cold. I wouldn't have said anything myself but it's hardly a crime. Everyone around me now is wearing jumpers, some with gilets on top. Far too suffocating for me but each to their own. There's obviously more to this than meets the eye. Do you think she disapproves of your dress sense? If so, ask yourself if what you wear is appropriate. If it is, carry on! She can mind her own business.

Forgot to add I'm young and apparently well dressed or so I'm told - so my comment isn't put down to my middle aged bitterness. (As if women of a certain age can't look and feel fabulous. 🙄)

The dress is short and wide. The problem is that it might make the wearer look short and wide too.
And why is the model in the photo holding a mop?

Middle of summer...makes sense, now? A tad out of season. I wouldn't say anything, but not surprised someone thinks you're cold.

@user1471867483

I don't think it matters what you're wearing, unless she's your manager it's none of her business?

Are you sure she wasn't just commenting on you being cold? I'm more 'mother hen' than jealous of your youth! I mean I'm envious of your youth/figure, I miss being 'the young attractive one' but not in a bitchy way, in a it's 'your turn!!'

if you're sure she wasnt actually concerned, just tell her (next time) that what you wear to work is none of her concern.

Obviously there is no way to know whether the dress is appropriate in your office but either way, a co-worker should be keeping her opinions about your dress to herself. If she thinks that your outfit is in some way indecent or affecting the way you can do your job then she could raise it with HR. Saying anything to you about what you are wearing is totally inappropriate.

I think given you are happy to judge others, you shouldn’t be surprised at being judged

Nips like chapel hat pegs ?

This was mentioned by someone on a different thread; she pointed out that the "OMG, I'm so crazy/whacky/quirky" ones often appear to be the most ordinary, conventional people imaginable... It's a bit like the "I've got a tattoo cos I'm a rebel" types when they are clearly anything but .... 🙄

I think maybe just get on with your job instead of worrying about making work a f*ing fashion show.

What you wear at work either matters (in which case your colleague mentioned it because it's probably inappropriate), or it doesn't (and therefore no-one really cares).

It's you going on about being floaty, vintage and wafty that's wound your colleagues up.

🤦‍♀️😂 My first thought as well!

Pretty much 😂

Thank you, yes. I forget about HR actually.