When did you realise you are just an employee and loyalty accounts for nothing?

[GorraSoreKnee]

Just here to see at what age did you realise that although work is an important part of your life- you are an employee and blood / swear/ tears/ loyal service accounts for nothing?

I am in my early 50’s and been in my current role for 25 + years- it has been hard/ stressful at times, have gone over and above, been loyal, helped progress careers, felt that I have contributed to others, made a difference to people in need (work in healthcare and NHS).
I always knew this moment would
come as I have some very dear older friends / now retired colleagues who would always try to help you get things in perspective and one would always say ‘ remember , we are all replaceable’. I did see one retire and she was replaced with ease and work continued to go around.

This month a managerial decision was made which will have a very very negative impact on myself and role but benefit others. It was clear what the outcome would be, but there was a wider management decision to be had, so clearly we are all employees in a machine.

i am very upset by this but mainly because I now realise in this moment loyalty accounts for nothing.
I am very sad and feel like it is a loss ( sounds irrational but that is how I feel as it has changed my perspective on work).
To top it off my line manager was more concerned about how my response was picked up in the team, rather than acknowledge I am human and it is hard at times to conceal emotional response.
Think this is now the time to explore that other things there are out there without fear of leaving what I know. I will get my CV up to date and will also do some financial review to see what options we have.

I am now having other life stresses as many others do in thier 50’s ( aging parents/ ill health/ children leaving home/ menopause/ seeing friends needing
cancer treatment/ husband dealing with work stress etc) so could do without
work shit/ pressures and too much responsibility which has just been thrown my way.
Another close friend of mine ( same age, same organisation) had this moment also last year, took a different outside job with a pay cut and it has worked out well.
I do think this is what happens to many
with jobs/ careers/ roles.
I am just reflecting that maybe I should
have realised this sooner and not done all the unpaid overtime over the years as it has accounted for nothing.

Has this happened to other women in their 50’s and how did you move forward?

Not really here for a discussion- would just like to hear other stories to help
me realise, amoungst my tears, I am not the only one and maybe hear some positive outcomes.

I was 56. Discord that my fancy title was a filler in title.
Left at 57.

Discovered not discord.

@TokTik7 What I was tempted to reply to them would probably get me banned from this site for profanity 😂
But being very professional, I let them know that I'm not available. After freelancing in a different industry for a while now I have developed a better perspective of the old job, and whilst I wouldn't be involved in the internal politics, they wouldn't pay me enough to take the aggro.

I know it intellectually but I tend to get drawn in , caught up in the role and too embedded. If I keep my distance I feel less job satisfaction

I was mid 30s with about a decade of working as an EA to C Suite Execs in large global companies. You hear everything that goes on behind closed doors and it's all about the money honey!

Mind you, I'm mid 50s now and the majority of managers having got a clue how to manage staff now. It's got progressively worse throughout my working life.

I work for myself now. I know where I stand if nothing else!

Newly qualified nurse (40). A few weeks into my first job it became apparent how replaceable/ what little value to were to management. Pretty disheartening after working my arse off for my degree. I’ve just resigned 3 months in.

When I was 29. My director loved me. I worked hard, til 10pm some nights.

got pregnant, came back from Mat leave. Director acted like she didn’t know me. My job got given to my temp Mat leave cover and they gave me a rubbish new role. Temp Mat leave cover got the promotion I had been working towards

Around 35 - I was working on a contract with a small team of 3 others, 2 youngish men and a woman in her 50s (team leader been there years). Everyone seemed to get on well, work was good etc but I came in one day and the older lady was emptying her desk under supervision and was then shown the door! No one mentioned what had just happened and carried on same as before. I didn't renew my contract!

So many people fall into this trap and it’s so sad. I realised in my 20’s that loyalty accounted for nothing and took a job with lower pay and less stress so I could enjoy my life, then I stayed at home with my kids for 3 years and the took another job that I absolutely love. It doesn’t pay big money, but there is no stress and I am the happiest I’ve ever been.
I have friends and family who earn 4 or 5 times what I do and have stuck with the same company for years. They are all stressed, all work long hours and some have even forgone relationships and children for the sake of their jobs (constantly moved around the world etc). If those companies decided to make cuts, they would be forgotten in an instant and all those sacrifices would be for nothing! Happiness, family and wellbeing are far more important than any job in my eyes, so while I give 100% while I’m at work, my loyalty Is firmly at home.

@enigma52 - all the best to you

I had my first weekend part time job when I was 15 and then and there I knew, it’s just a job, people come and go. I don’t take any job ‘seriously’ enough. I do enough to stay under the radar and not get sacked😆 I’ll stay at a job if it suits me, if it doesn’t suit me anymore, I’ll leave. Saying that, I’m 40 now, have been at my current job since 2017 and previous job 2008-2017 with two year long maternity leaves 2013 & 15 So I can put in the longevity because I don’t care enough, it’s money for my personal life, so I don’t get bothered or embroiled in work nonsense.

Struggled for suitable work after redundancy at 50, found a minimum wage job which suited, was there until March 2020, and after Covid, struggled again to find anything suitable. I have ongoing work at the moment, which I'm grateful for, but my attitude towards work is much more cynical, and like many employers these days, this particular employee will not go the extra mile eg overtime, as I regard all work as temporary now.
I'm sorry about the news you have received, can understand the emotion and saying goodbyes to co workers, but please harden your heart now and think of yourself.

I watched my dad do unpaid overtime almost every day and never take a sick day for my entire childhood and then he was made redundant, illegally, after 25 years and all his days of loyalty counted for nothing and he eventually got less than a years salary as compensation.

Mid 20's. Worked in a place where the owner would walk round and conduct a Christmas cull on Dec 24th. If he walked up to someone to speak to them - we all knew that was the chop. He chose the weakest links every year - 1 or 2 people usually. People who didn't pull their weight or came in late or off sick frequently. I did feel really bad for one young guy. He'd just got a mortgage on his first flat. He cried as he left. He was inefficient though. He daydreamed and stared out of windows a lot, didn't fill his time. For example - if he had 200 sheets to photocopy he'd just stand there for 20 minutes watching the copier spit them out.

Loyalty doesn't necessarily make people the most effective employees/roles to have. Loyalty could just be lack of motivation to find a new role/challenge. None of us are 'special'. Organisations thrive with new input and fresh visions.

@CaramelMac

That's awful, I hope your Dad went on to enjoy his free time. I find it despicable the way employers behave. Was your Dad in a trade union?

Think it was my 30’s but reminded regularly.

Everytime I see a valued, highly skilled member of department move on because they’ve been under appreciated.

The problem is they often aren’t replaced with someone as good, but those in charge don’t seem to notice/care and it’s the efficient people left behind who have to pick up the slack/ deal with stress from incompetent colleagues

Came into a new role. felt the day i walked in that things were 'off'. Went home the first night and said to DH ' the atmosphere is strange here'.

lasted 4 years. Just got ground down and ground down. I was so stressed that I would get up at 3 am to 'try and get a jump start on the day'. I kept begging my line manager for guidance and help and support and was blanked. The day i resigned my line manager said; 'At least you resigned. [xx - the man I replaced] committed suicide'.

That was literally the first I had heard of it. Turned out it was true.

He was 10 years from retirement and luckily he did find another job, but because he was in quite a specialised field my parents had to move house and lost money on the move and and had to downsize, but he’s now happily retired. He wasn’t in a union.

Retired NHS clinician and manager and I have ALWAYS known this and made sure that my staff knew it too. Not saying that I have never gone over and above but always my choice on my terms and I have never encouraged or guilted staff into doing it. On a couple of occasions, I have taken action to stop staff getting themselves into difficulties by doing stuff outside of their work hours/remit.

27, I had covered a senior management position for 8 months due to sick leave (no additional pay because I was naive enough to think it counted for something & would pay off long term). Without meaning to sound arrogant, I did a great job, data backed it up, two quarterly written reviews etc confirmed it to.

I didn't get the promotion & they gave it to a man twice my age who everyone knew was useless & was kind of in limbo as other department wanted him gone.

I was asked afterwards, why would they promote me so young when I had the rest of my life to get promoted & also asked to train him. Later denied it was said when I mentioned discrimination. It was due to money & an old boys club mentality.

Lucky, a competitor heard what happened and immediately offered me a move. (50% increase in salary). That wasn't really about me either, they made a huge big show of it which obviously I loved at the time but that was really more to annoy ex employer than anything else.

Still with them and haven't been burnt yet but I'm sure the time will probably come at some stage.

In my 20s.

A year ago at age 45. Put my life and soul into that job for 5 years only to be told by a new-broom manager that I'd had zero impact. I left shortly after to go elsewhere and have never been happier and continue to make a great impact I'm told

Yes just this week my eyes have been well and truly opened. I actually resigned from my job but felt pressure to do it.
The way have been tested has been despicable.
As another poster said all work is temporary, everything is temporary- best way to think of it. No loyalty whatsoever

Hi op, I also work for the NHS, frontline, and have for 32 yrs. Like you I’ve gone above and beyond, worked late, skipped lunch etc for a long time. My eye opener was when I was misfortunate to be really really poorly with covid resulting in an extended period of sick leave. All my manager was interested in was when I’d be returning to work, she adhered to the 4 week phased return as suggested by occupational health, after which I was expected to perform as I did pre covid, but was also expected to pick up extra weekends as others had covered the ones I would have done if I hadnt have been ill.
I hit the big 60 last October, I was and still am struggling to meet the demands of the job, so applied for my NHS pension. I leave at Easter and am hoping to persue a very part time role in a completely different job. You are right we are all replaceable, Ive listened to conversations about how wonderful my replacement will ve!

In my first job, I was lucky enough. I have worked for money ever since. I do like what I do but I also like to be paid properly for that.