When did you realise you are just an employee and loyalty accounts for nothing?

[GorraSoreKnee]

Just here to see at what age did you realise that although work is an important part of your life- you are an employee and blood / swear/ tears/ loyal service accounts for nothing?

I am in my early 50’s and been in my current role for 25 + years- it has been hard/ stressful at times, have gone over and above, been loyal, helped progress careers, felt that I have contributed to others, made a difference to people in need (work in healthcare and NHS).
I always knew this moment would
come as I have some very dear older friends / now retired colleagues who would always try to help you get things in perspective and one would always say ‘ remember , we are all replaceable’. I did see one retire and she was replaced with ease and work continued to go around.

This month a managerial decision was made which will have a very very negative impact on myself and role but benefit others. It was clear what the outcome would be, but there was a wider management decision to be had, so clearly we are all employees in a machine.

i am very upset by this but mainly because I now realise in this moment loyalty accounts for nothing.
I am very sad and feel like it is a loss ( sounds irrational but that is how I feel as it has changed my perspective on work).
To top it off my line manager was more concerned about how my response was picked up in the team, rather than acknowledge I am human and it is hard at times to conceal emotional response.
Think this is now the time to explore that other things there are out there without fear of leaving what I know. I will get my CV up to date and will also do some financial review to see what options we have.

I am now having other life stresses as many others do in thier 50’s ( aging parents/ ill health/ children leaving home/ menopause/ seeing friends needing
cancer treatment/ husband dealing with work stress etc) so could do without
work shit/ pressures and too much responsibility which has just been thrown my way.
Another close friend of mine ( same age, same organisation) had this moment also last year, took a different outside job with a pay cut and it has worked out well.
I do think this is what happens to many
with jobs/ careers/ roles.
I am just reflecting that maybe I should
have realised this sooner and not done all the unpaid overtime over the years as it has accounted for nothing.

Has this happened to other women in their 50’s and how did you move forward?

Not really here for a discussion- would just like to hear other stories to help
me realise, amoungst my tears, I am not the only one and maybe hear some positive outcomes.

This IS how it must be though OP @GorraSoreKnee

I learned fairly early on that I was just a cog and adjusted my behaviour accordingly.

People that throw themselves into work are treated badly compared to those who have a, 'take it or leave it' attitude too I have noticed.

I can't work at the moment but if I ever do, I will give exactly what I am paid for and no more. Been stung too many times but the millennium proved my point.

I was in a team in the year 2000. We were all equal but I was the oldest, the most experienced and the most qualified so I tended to be the spokesperson for the team with management.

It fell to one of the younger members of the team to be on call over the NY going into 2000 and she flatly refused. There were no consequences of this at all but I was asked to take her place even though I had a party to attend.

Eventually I agreed if I got paid double time for the time on call. Triple time if I got called in, I wanted £200 cash and a piece of architectural hardware that was likely going into the skip (builders in) had I not expressed an interest in it. All of this was agreed by management.

I got paid the double time. I didn't get called in. I took the piece of hardware but it took them six months to pay the £200 and then they tried to claim the hardware back just in case it was valuable (it wasn't).

FFS they are not supposed to operate without cover so I did them a favour and they treated me like shite. I left after a few more months. I wish I had flatly refused to help them out.

Age 42 when I worked from home the whole time I was caring for my DM after major bowel cancer surgery (10 days in ICU, nearly died) didn’t miss any hours, continued to keep up with work (I worked from my DM’s house/hospital so I could be there if she needed me) yet into the second week of doing this (and final week. Was due back the following week) received a shitty nasty email from manager who I considered a friend, that if I was going to need more time (I wasn’t, hadn’t even asked!) then I’d need a sick note or a note asking for ‘altered work provisions’

i handed in my notice the following week and never went back, sent a very honest email as to why.

45 yeas ago. I twigged pretty quickly.

Early on luckily, there is no loyalty, You exchange work for money, they will get rid of you when the business no longer needs you. Its purely transactional.

I work in HR and have literally been sat in meetings where the directors are told they have to save x amount and basically discuss which staff they'll have to get rid of.
It's genuinely not personal 99% of tje time, its just economics.

It's heartbreaking when you put your heart and soul into something and it's not appreciated. But time to move on if that's the case. There are better jobs and people out there. Probably my worst experience was for a family member's business who became more and more unhinged and abusive as time went on. They say never to do it, I should have listened! I'm in a much better place now thankfully.

I'm approaching 50 and always worked really hard to progress in my roles. A large reason for this is that being diligent and intelligent is how I want to define myself, and I evaluate myself on how I am perceived in the workplace.

I've been in my current role in an organisation for almost 5 years, and paid for 2 days work each week. The reality is that I work much more than 2 days a week. I have worked overtime (including evenings and weekends) without expectation of increased pay, and have travelled several times a year for 3-day meetings as a single parent (also unpaid).

In addition, it's a toxic work environment in which others in similar roles are aggressively vying for recognition and have no problem with presenting your work/ideas as their own and dumping on you if it helps them look better. Some are quite openly hostile. There is also very much a sense of if your face fits, your ideas will be welcomed but if not, you really shouldn't have dared speak up. Finally, the boss is openly ageist (despite also being female and older than me!).

I've tried to pull up my big girl pants and get on with it. I've tried to show that I'm eager to progress and take on new responsibilities, encouraged by the fact that the feedback on my work is consistently positive and I know I do much more than was originally intended. Nonetheless, I see more junior team members and also less able team members rising through the ranks, whereas I've stayed where I was. It's as though I'm invisible.

Two weeks ago, I plucked up the courage to cautiously ask by email (how most of our communication takes place) if there might be any opportunities for development/progression in my role, given the additional tasks I've taken on over time and how well my work has been received. And I haven't even heard back. So, I'm feeling very acutely that they really don't care about me at all, or anything I've done.

I'm now looking back and regretting how much I've done in the name of work that has taken time away from my children - and for what?? I wish I'd remembered that we work to live, not live to work, many years ago.

Thank you so much for all the updates. I REALLY needed to hear this.

I EXPERIENCED it at 21 but now at nearly 50 I never LEARNED. I wish I could care less about whatever job I do but by Christ I'm not going to make the same mistake next time.

In the late 1970s I reached a point where, due to structural changes within the profession, my qualifications were regarded by management as outdated. Young graduates were entering the profession with a shitty little bit of paper (often a not very good degree) which my colleagues and I did not have. Instead of coming in at entry level and learning the job (and being promoted on merit) they were given accelerated promotion. Many were promoted beyond their experience or ability.

My epiphany came one day when I was sitting in an office with one of these new graduates attempting to do the monthly statistics. He was writing a report. Three times he interrupted me to ask how to spell a word I could have spelled at 11. Eventually I fetched a disctionary, dumped it in front of him, and said "Use this. Your supposed to be the graduate!"

Not long afterwards I began the process of applying to universities as a mature student. I was in my early 40s. I graduated from a RG uni with a 1st, then went on to do a masters and a doctorate and became an academic. Colleagues I had left behind were made redundant in a big shake up three years after I left and found themselves jobless.

Yes! I learned while in the NHS thirty years ago. All the talk of 'family' in the workplace, is supposed to keep you loyal but it doesn't work both ways! My role has just been made redundant . What happens next? I'm asked for my expertise and knowledge while no longer being employed....mind blowing! Today I was talking to a friend who is in the situation of being overlooked for promotion. The two people who got the job regularly ring her for advice on legislation in their job and advice on how to manage clients. The expectation is that she will do overtime...no longer! People are crackers

When I realised people in another department got a payrise and I didn’t. Different job, but similar level. Asked for a pay rise and didn’t get it. Reasons were given, but I realised the powers-to-be didn’t realise what I did, and how hard I worked. Looked around, and found a job and handed in my notice two weeks later.

28 and was refused a pay rise for being pregnant. This was a household name national charity. While I was on mat leave they gave my job to my deputy and so it was a bit of a shock to them when I returned to work.
it took me just 8 weeks to get out including my 4 week notice period.

35 years ago when I started. I went in knowing loyalty counts for nothing and they’d get rid of me at the drop of a hat.

I only work for money and if I can get more elsewhere, I’ll jump.