DH's colleague thwarting flex working request

[mamabeeboo]

Hi all

We are due twins in 8 weeks time, really excited/nervous/stressed, but trying to prepare as much as we can. 😁

DH works in two different shift patterns alternating weekly. One week 6-2pm, next week 9-5pm, then back to 6am.

The plan for the twins is for DH to submit a flexible working request, where he can do 6-2pm shift indefinitely. So we can keep nursery costs down by paying for half day for the twins until 1pm. I can take my lunch break until DH gets back. This works for us financially, for obvious reasons.

The flex working request means his colleague is stuck on the later shift, which is the "worse shift" since you don't have a free afternoon, you are stuck on your own finishing everything etc etc. No real reason other than it's a bit of an inconvenience.

Question - what do we need to be aware of when submitting a flexi working request? Is there anything we can explain on the request to make sure that feedback from colleague is not a reason for a no? Does management even have to share the request to colleagues to get some understanding on how this would be received? Ideally we would like to keep it confidential.

Of course manager will consider the impact on the team, but technically 'colleague doesn't like it' isn't a reason for a decline according to the gov website. But he can make life a bit difficult for DH and kick off quite a bit. He seems to be quite a rowdy person from the few times I have met him.

His colleague must have the same skill set and be identically hard to replace if they do opposite shifts.

This is some immense cheeky fuckery that it is beyond funny and your reply is even funnier!

You are surely taking the piss, no?!

Read this all back. See how you sound. It's not good.

It would be more reasonable to request a fixed work pattern for predictable child care scheduling. The other employee might also appreciate a fixed work pattern. The exact pattern can then be determined in a way that works for the company and both employees.

Why can't your Husband work the late shift ?

Your having twins. How is that someone else's problem? You need to work around your husband's job no one else is obliged too.

I just asked the best way to submit the request by posting on the work thread. Didn't ask if I was being unreasonable. Will potentially consider the 2-3 day rotating shift as an alternative if the answer is no, so thanks for those who suggested that.

Yes I think that's the best way to do it. Make it so he is requesting a fixed shift pattern that enables nursery plans to be made more easily.

Also why is he making this your problem - he should be trying to figure it out

Maybe becusse he knows how it will be received and that it's unreasonable....

So perhaps being understaffed for that amount of time is better, and the colleague will get to do all the shifts he wants.....🙄
So colleague doing this is awful and dreadful, but you just expect everyone else to do it for your DH?

There are 8 business reasons on which an employer can reject a FW request- suggest your husband looks at them and tries to demonstrate why they would not apply in his case.

Inability to reorganise work amongst existing staff would likely be the one this request is rejected for - if someone (the colleague) has been working the existing shift pattern for some time, the employer can't just expect them to change to the 'worse' shift type. That's not fair. If the colleague has been working a year or more on the existing shift pattern they would likely claim these shifts are part of their terms and conditions of employment (because of how long it's been going on). Ts & Cs cannot be changed without mutual agreement- and they probably won't agree!

It can absolutely be rejected if it’s detrimental to another staff member.

for example - it could mean a contract change for the other staff member, which they don’t have to agree with

I can't believe what entitlement I have read.

Everybody's replaceable!

Imagine thinking you having kids means that someone else has to change their job for the worse to make your life easier. If entitlement had a face

It's not his colleagues fault you're having kids. If his job is that specialist and niche then surely a few hours in nursery can be covered. Fucking entitled parents thinking they're more important because they've got kids 🤣

I want a husband like this
He works from 6-2 then picks twins up from day care untill you get home . Blimey, will he make supper as well?

Wow, how would your DH feel if it was the other way around?

You’re so bloody selfish.

Op
The factual answer to your question is yes the permanent shift being unfair to the other person is a legitimate reason to refuse your request.
It would be a much harder shift to full permanently so even if your husband threatened to leave , the company would take a view that it would likely make it very hard to fill the other shift as permanent hours should the other person leave .
In my company we wouldn't open the door to such a request as we have lots of shift workers so it would be an nightmare if a chunk of them demanded the same thing ie the good half of the shift. It's unlikely they'll allow it for that reason no matter how good your dh is. I'd definitely work on alternative suggestions though that might work.

I can see why they'd refuse this request. It would be different if it was a large team and they could accommodate a few people asking for set shifts.

I think the idea of half days on his early weeks makes sense though. Perhaps look for childminders rather than nurseries. They might be more flexible with an alternate weeks pattern. They might be up for this if they also do after school care.

The other option is to flex yourself into a 9 day fortnight situation to get a similar every other week pattern so you could use half days all the time

Imagine plotting to find a way to make another person's life shit and trying to keep it all a secret. Because you know, god forbid this person find out object to making their life worse to benefit a person who clearly doesn't give a crap about them

You need to come up with other options.

In your scenario I'd probably give the option to the collegue to take the permanent late shift, but if they declined, I'd decline the request based on unfairness.

I would be open to other options which were fair on both.

It's not fair to just impose worse working conditions on someone for any of the reasons you have.

No way can this be serious. Do people actually not give a shit about their colleagues to this extent, as long as THEY are ok?

Not sure why you think a colleague should be inconvenienced by you having kids but not yourselves.