DH's colleague thwarting flex working request

[mamabeeboo]

Hi all

We are due twins in 8 weeks time, really excited/nervous/stressed, but trying to prepare as much as we can. 😁

DH works in two different shift patterns alternating weekly. One week 6-2pm, next week 9-5pm, then back to 6am.

The plan for the twins is for DH to submit a flexible working request, where he can do 6-2pm shift indefinitely. So we can keep nursery costs down by paying for half day for the twins until 1pm. I can take my lunch break until DH gets back. This works for us financially, for obvious reasons.

The flex working request means his colleague is stuck on the later shift, which is the "worse shift" since you don't have a free afternoon, you are stuck on your own finishing everything etc etc. No real reason other than it's a bit of an inconvenience.

Question - what do we need to be aware of when submitting a flexi working request? Is there anything we can explain on the request to make sure that feedback from colleague is not a reason for a no? Does management even have to share the request to colleagues to get some understanding on how this would be received? Ideally we would like to keep it confidential.

Of course manager will consider the impact on the team, but technically 'colleague doesn't like it' isn't a reason for a decline according to the gov website. But he can make life a bit difficult for DH and kick off quite a bit. He seems to be quite a rowdy person from the few times I have met him.

Our flexible working request specifically asks the person doing it to explain the impact on their colleagues & the business and then what their plans to mitigate those would be. This might just be my work but they are questions I’d think your DH should consider.

has the other colleague specifically said that they won’t want to work the late shift? Is your husband & colleague contracted to these hours? If so you won’t be able to change the colleagues contact without their agreement and therefore there will be a cost to be business of doing this to cover the 2-5 slot every other week.

your DH is not crazy to ask but you need to be prepared for it to be a no.

I work in a shift job with unsociable hours. The only way you’d get approved for something like this is if you offer up other unsociable hours in return. Eg, you could work regular hours but you’d have to work every weekend.

You’re right! There is a toddler!

When I returned to work from maternity leave I had to submit a business case to go from full to part time. In that I had to suggest/propose my working pattern. I wanted to do 21 hours but settled on 17.5 as realistically my employers were unlikely to be able to recruit to cover the remaining hours. I work as a building surveyor for a housing association and actually they only had 1 application for the other half or my role. Fortunately they were excellent and was appointed.
So i think maybe u need to put a realistic proposal together. Maybe even looking at a split shift option if that would work with your partners colleague and your childcare requirements.
Good luck, u hope it works out for you. Childcare costs are a bloody nightmare.
Oh and some nurseries/childminders will accommodate shift patterns.

I think to maybe ask ,but dont be surprised if the answer is a big fat No! Congratulations on your Twins ,but you cannot expect your colleague to completely change his shift pattern for your benefit! A better idea may be to sound him /her out first .If they refuse you may be better off looking for a CM who are often cheaper .Otherwise SAHP for a few years

I had this happen to me. The other worker got the shifts they wanted and i got left with the other shifts nobody wanted to do. Which caused me issues due to other commitments i had. I ended up having to leave the job. It made me feel absolutely awful.

Ok everyone is being really unkind to the OP . She clearly did not understand how flexi requests work .OP as a team leader I do my best to accommodate everyone and even more if it’s related to childcare as over the years I’ve seen many employees being lost this way and I truly value my team and their skills , I handpicked them and loosing a member causes massive disruption.I would not uphold this sort of request without willingly finding someone who only wanted to do the other shift , I could potentially suggest that they both did fixed half and half or 60/40 as in one would work lest day Monday to Wednesday 6-2 and the other would do that Thursday and Friday and would as a example benefit from picking annual leave before the other or if they work Christmas or similar work that shift .
mas I said I value every single individual on my team but I could not force one on a work pattern that would only benefit one side .

This. Jeez how selfish can you be op?

Put the request in by all means but be prepared.

As an aside, having twins doesn't top trump anything.

Remember that this colleague is the one whose goodwill you will need for all of the summer holidays, Christmas, school sports days etc. that your DH will want off.

So probably best not to annoy him and other colleagues now.

Mum of twins here, born when oldest was 11 months.

I also managed a large team at work…

You/anyone are completely entitled to put in a flexible working request but usually your employer would ask you to consider the impact to the business, your colleagues and rest of the team and the deliverables. It’s not all about setting out the why and the personal need. Your employer will pay more attention to the impact to those impacted by the change. So dismissing the impact to others will not be a good move here if I can offer any advice.

Its an expensive time, you either need to suck it up, (and reap the benefits later down the line) or chose to take a step back from work to reduce the childcare costs. Ie, reducing hours etc. I chose to suck up the ridiculously expensive costs in those early years and have been promoted over the years to a senior role so for me, the high costs in those early years really paid off. My kids are at school now so we are starting to have extra money now and in a couple of years my childcare costs will be non-existent.

good luck with the request but with no appreciation for the impact to others it’s likely to be declined.

Why does childcare trump other requests?

in my workplace this would be discriminatory. I have a lot of team members who have caring responsibilities for older relatives. They are not less important.

Agreed. The title of the post is misleading. The colleague appears to have done nothing so far!

Bits of your plan sound reasonable. However, you do seem to accept that the late shift is the less desirable one. I really lost patience when you wrote 'The flex working request means his colleague is stuck on the later shift, which is the "worse shift" since you don't have a free afternoon, you are stuck on your own finishing everything etc etc. No real reason other than it's a bit of an inconvenience.' You have no basis for judgement as to whether the late shift is an inconvenience to your colleague, or worse.

Anyway, I do have a suggestion. You seem to think that if your suggestion is refused, your DH will have to leave. (And also that you can rearrange shift hours behind your colleague's back. I hope this thread, if nothing else, has shown you that this is not possible.)

So you are in the position where you have to reaarrange shift hours with your colleague's approval, or your DH will have to leave. You should be thinking about how you can sweeten the deal for your colleague so that s/he embraces the idea enthusiastially, surely! The suggestion which occurs to me is that your DH refuses the next pay rise or sacrifices some salary to enable the colleague to relish the "worse shift". Unless the colleague falls on your DH's shoulders with grateful tears for being offered the opportunity to work 9-5 and extend their working week by travelling at the worst time possible, sweetening the deal is the only logical way forward, and the only logical way to strengthen your FW request.

Oh and I do the late shifts..because the early ones are reserved for the pregnant and those with school kids. When I requested to some earlies I was told no as I'm childless

Sorry, in case not clear - any salary sacrifice would go straight to the colleague, of course.

OP, anyone can submit a flexible.working request.
What if DHs colleague decided he also only wanted to do the early shift and your DH just had to accept it, because him not liking it didn't matter.

How would you feel then?

If this was me I would be invoking the Equalities Act, as this is clear indirect disability discrimination (disabled people as a group more likely to be affected by this rule as more difficulties conceiving, bearing children). I appreciate this is a slightly off the wall approach, but still believe the legal argument would hold water!

I've dealt with a few requests for my team and put in a few myself over the years. My advice would be to wait until 4 months before you go back to work, get on nursery waiting lists just incase. I wouldn't have thought any employer could predict what the business need ans staffing needs would be so far in advance. People are very negative about flexible working requests, but it's true if you don't ask don't get. You may find someone wants to do the later shift so they can take children to school in the morning etc. People's working patterns are so different now that anything is possible.

When you do put the request in, make sure you say how it will benefit the business too. Hope all goes well x

Reminds me of a colleague, some people really are that entitled sadly.

When you do put the request in, make sure you say how it will benefit the business too this bit is where people fall down imo

Definitely put in a request. Perhaps the employer will come up with an idea which works well for all involved . For me, working the later shift would have been preferable as I hate getting up early. You never know. Obviously, if your husband's collegues don't agree then not much you can do but look for a different job. There are loads of weekend jobs, WFH or night shift jobs which might work out better for you as a family. Best of luck

even more if it’s related to childcare

@Mumwomansisterdaughter if I worked in your team and got a whiff of you prioritising those with children over those who don’t, I would have no hesitation in reporting you. In fact I and others did that when we had a manager that did that very thing - the warning he got from HR soon stopped that

That's got to be illegal?!