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Original poster

To be shit scared I'll loose my job

331 replies

SunshineInCorwall · 09/12/2022 16:07

We have a first come, first served for Christmas and if you work one Christmas Day you get the next off. Most of our team have children under 8.

This year its my turn to work. Howver, that every other Christmas I've been due to work recently, there has been some emergency and I've had to call in a day or so nefore Christmas. Kids sick, DH sick, you know real life!

Just overheard two colleagues seriously talking about whether they "take the hit now" and offer to swap with me now or which one will be on call to cover me over Christmas, so they can manage expectations for their kids, they seemed really worried as noth have had to step in on a previous Christmas. Our team leader also overheard and just said to them that she's "aware" and will move heaven and to protect their break. (she's already working running the whole dept over Christmas so won't see her children at all, so not sure what that means)

I'm shit scared that something will happen and I will loose my job. What can I do? My husband is wonderful but useless so can't leave him to anything.

Would you quietly approach colleagues and ask them to swap?

OP posts:
Changechangychange · 09/12/2022 21:40

So every time you are due to work on Christmas you pull a sickie, and you are wondering whether to pre-empt that this year by asking people to swap into your Christmas Day shift, on the grounds that you’ll only pull another sickie anyway if they don’t?

Because you don’t want to get in the shit calling in sick again from your manager, but clearly don’t plan to turn up to work on Christmas Day again regardless?

OP, you are one massive CF.

PotatoScollop · 09/12/2022 21:42

You're an entitled piss-taker and your colleagues, whom have families, kids, responsibilities and problems of their own, have been suffering the brunt of it for years. I'm aghast that you're shocked they'd talk about you like that.

You've took the utter piss out of them, be thankful that's all they've had to say. I'd be making a point of refusing to be on call to cover you and making you well aware that if you call in sick to work your contracted holiday this time, then the work won't get done and that's on you - and I wouldn't do it behind your back.

NewNovember · 09/12/2022 21:50

I feel so sorry for their children. Your dh or your kids being sick don't stop you working.

PotatoScollop · 09/12/2022 21:52

Oh, and your partner is an utter piss-taker too.

I get having depression. I really do. I get partners having to step in occasionally, when you/them are unable to 'life'. The key is occasionally. I have zero doubt it's hard wiping your partners backside constantly, and in fact, you probably feel totally fucking frazzled and at your wits end.

But none of it excuses what you've done to your colleagues. Do something about your situation, instead of whinging that your colleagues are saying they cannot rely on you to do your fucking job.

CelestiaNoctis · 09/12/2022 21:54

Is your husband a child? I'm confused. Who would marry someone so useless they couldn't be trusted to care for their own children for 1 day. That's actually really scary!

TheShellBeach · 09/12/2022 21:58

My husband is wonderful but useless so can't leave him to anything.

So not actually wonderful at all, then?

TheShellBeach · 09/12/2022 22:01

I'm going to ask my mum to stay over Christmas to help out if needed.

Instead of making your useless husband actually look after his own children?

StClare101 · 09/12/2022 22:04

Faaaaaark.

Get a grip, OP.

The only conversation you should be having at work is apologising for being so selfish and assuring your colleagues you won’t do it again.

They have you nailed as a complete flake and they probably don’t like you.

Depression is not an excuse not to look after your own children.

Starrylight · 09/12/2022 22:06

Do 'Christmas day' before actual Christmas Day on your day off in the run up to it. That way I'm pretty sure your DH can at least manage to bung something in the microwave for the kids, and plonk them infront of the TV?...

Fingeronthebutton · 09/12/2022 22:07

It’s not your work colleagues fault that you married a useless article.

Moon22 · 09/12/2022 22:16

If I'm not misunderstanding, I think it's your turn to work, you've called in sick last couple of years and now it's most definitely your turn to work!
I doubt you'll lose your job if you decide to be sick again, but you will have a very poor reputation in work and amongst your colleagues. And it's just unfair not to do your bit when you took a job that you knew involved unsocial hours.
Definitely do not ask anyone to swap! It's only one day! You'll be home in tge evening!

Maze76 · 09/12/2022 22:24

Maybe it’s time to look for another job that doesn’t involve shifts?

caringcarer · 09/12/2022 22:31

This must be a joke. No husband can be that useless. If he is left alone with sock kids he will look after them if you are at work. Stop enabling his incompetence.

ReneBumsWombats · 09/12/2022 22:38

No husband can be that useless.

Stick around.

MichaelFabricantWig · 09/12/2022 22:42

It’s so clear you’re planning to do a number on them again OP. You are so transparent. Why else would you think you’ll lose your job when you haven’t done anything yet, and why would you be asking people to swap unless you knew you were going to shit on them again?

is this care, OP?

alltoomuchrightnow · 09/12/2022 22:55

You are an entitled being who can't spell 'lose'.
You say 'real life' yet real life for me, being childless / infertile, is covering for entitled beings like you every Christmas, and rest of the year too...
But I'm starting to put foot down as it's been my entire working career (now 51).
In fact i even left a job because of it because my co manager insisted she couldn't work weekends any more because she is a mother (this was retail too! amazingly she kept her job!)
So,.. real life is.. being prepared, being organised and not being .. a dick.

yesforone · 09/12/2022 22:58

You need to work X mas day. It's your turn and it is not fair for others to cover for you.

Utilityroomenvy · 09/12/2022 22:59

It’s lose not loose. Lose your job. Not loose it. For that alone I would have to fire you (joke).

Dibbydoos · 09/12/2022 23:06

Seriously this is a real issue?

If you've messed up colleagues plans previouslywork extra hard to get it right this year. If kids are ill your DH will have to cope, if he's ill he'll have to cope. If you're ill, drag yourself in, wear a mask and power through

Contingency plan for you to go to work otherwise you could well lose your job.

ememem84 · 09/12/2022 23:06

TugboatAnnie · 09/12/2022 17:58

Absolutely. Your dh can just babysit the children, no big event that he is unable to cope with, and do Christmas on your next day off.

Show quote history

Ddad was emergency services so often we had to have Christmas on a different day when I was a kid. Or we’d have 2. One with him and one with just mum.

alltoomuchrightnow · 09/12/2022 23:18

same for me, Tugboat.. fireman dad .... many Christmasses without him.. I'm not scarred by it! If anything it meant we extended it further..

Tunnocks2022 · 09/12/2022 23:30

FuckMyLife2022 · 09/12/2022 20:35

Lol. I have CPTSD and have been under CMHT for years. I’m also a lone parent that works. I have to look after my kids and earn money because there’s no other adult here to wipe my arse for me.

Show quote history

Ha yes, I have severe depression, one of my DCs has additional needs, my DH died years ago and I’m cracking on with work and everything else alone.

So many of us have no choice. Don’t let your colleagues down again.

FlamingJingleBells · 10/12/2022 08:29

The op has already stated that she isn’t coming back to this thread but I’m case she is still reading it. You need to work Christmas, Easter Sunday & next Christmas to cover some of the 8 years that you’ve missed. You can’t rebuild the trust you’ve lost but start to repay the debt of holiday cover for your team. Because you owe them big time and if you an an ounce of decency in your body, you’d keep quiet & work the holiday shift.

Postapocalypticcowgirl · 10/12/2022 08:52

To address your point about your manager discussing it with your colleagues, you do have to be aware that if they raise this sort of issue with her (e.g. "I had to cover for Christmas last year, am I going to need to be available for Christmas again?"), she has a right to discuss it with them- she didn't discuss any disciplinary action with them, which would be wrong- she just said she would ensure their Christmases were protected.

I'd imagine if you are this flakey abotu Christmas, there are other times when you are flakey too- and if your manager has serious concerns then she should be addressing these with you.

If you husband is so ill, is it compatible with you working a job with demands like working on christmas day?

Sparklingbrook · 10/12/2022 08:54

I’m stepping away now =I am flouncing because I didn’t like the replies.