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Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

Feminism: chat

Original poster

Good things about being a feminist

144 replies

sethstarkaddersmum · 03/07/2010 13:33

I'll start.

  1. Less painful feet
OP posts:
chibi · 03/07/2010 13:34

self respect

a way to keep from internalising the hatred directed against women, a tool for helping me see it in context

basically, self-defense in every sense

damn i am glad to be a feminist

BertieBotts · 03/07/2010 13:40

Actually looking forward to or at least feeling indifferent about my period, not feeling disgusted by it and like it is an inconvenience.

ElephantsAndMiasmas · 03/07/2010 13:41
  1. You get to enjoy the company and appreciate the achievements of other women, without worrying about what they're wearing and being needlessly competitive.
  1. You don't get that nagging feeling that something's not quite right in the way you're treated/stripclubs on every corner/girls with playboy crap - you know what's wrong.
  1. Less hoovering.
ElephantsAndMiasmas · 03/07/2010 13:44
  1. you get to look at older women with admiration and respect, not disgust at their wrinkles.

  1. Advertising stops being persuasive and becomes nauseating/hilarious

  2. Magical ability to see through pompous misogynistic arses

  3. Have copious time free that used to be spent on hating your body

ElephantsAndMiasmas · 03/07/2010 13:46

  1. You don't have to change your name (your own name FGS) because you happen to go into legal partnership with a man.

  2. (I would guess) children who respect you as more than a household functionary (not talking about WOHM/SAHM btw, just a general retention of the right to be your own person after giving birth )

LadyintheRadiator · 03/07/2010 13:49

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

vesuvia · 03/07/2010 13:51

Maybe its just the way I am reading it but I'm not sure I understand number 7. Are you saying you are glad to sure rather naggingly uncertain? And the certainty is the good thing about being a feminist? If so, I agree.

Original poster
sethstarkaddersmum · 03/07/2010 13:54

Ladyintheradiator - you are allowed to wear heeled shoes if you are a feminist, but only if they are comfortable and don't give you bunions or blisters.
That is the Feminist Gospel According To Me.

OP posts:
ElephantsAndMiasmas · 03/07/2010 13:54

Yes, vesuvia, sorry should have clarified - you know what's wrong, rather than being mystified!

Of course you can LitR, but this seems to me a light-hearted thread about the things that feminism has done/does for us that makes our lives better. Knowing I don't have to change my name when I get married, and that high-heels are not what I have to wear, improves my life. Maybe something else makes yours better.

LadyintheRadiator · 03/07/2010 13:57

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
sethstarkaddersmum · 03/07/2010 14:02

I think that's your problem rather than ours LadyInTheRadiator.

OP posts:
differentnameforthis · 03/07/2010 14:08

Well, you see...I am not a feminist & that all applies to me...

Hmm. And agree with Lady. reads as a list as to why you are better than non feminist women.

And that's not very feminist, is it!

chibi · 03/07/2010 14:08

Iam not better than 'those women' who do 'those things'

but tbh I think my quality of life is better

I don't spend any time smugging at women who wear makeup or whatever

in a patriarchy women have to try and get by as best as they can and it is a real fucking job to keep body and soul together

so I don't blame women for making choices which to me are unfeminist

I blame the patriarchy and misogyny for creating a matrix wherein those choices are (or perhaps more likely appear to be) the only viable ones

LadyintheRadiator · 03/07/2010 14:22

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
sethstarkaddersmum · 03/07/2010 14:26

but saying not wearing heels is a good thing about being a feminist doesn't mean that you think everyone except feminists wear heels.
If you said that getting out into the fresh air was one of the good things about having a dog no-one would think you were saying that nobody except people with dogs ever got out into the fresh air, would they?

OP posts:
LadyintheRadiator · 03/07/2010 14:47

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

frikonastick · 03/07/2010 14:58

well LITR, we can all assure you thats not what this thread is about

what do you feel is good about being a feminist?

LynetteScavo · 03/07/2010 15:04

Light hearted?

Or bloody patronising?

I wear heels

I love getting my period,

I changed my name to my husbands when we married.

I have been known to wear short skirts.

My children know that females and males are equal, and must be treated equally (even if it means letting DS have long hair,and having DD's cut short LOL )

I'm guessing you lot were probably not raised as feminists, and have discovered it along the way.

frikonastick · 03/07/2010 15:14

"I'm guessing you lot were probably not raised as feminists, and have discovered it along the way."

wow.

MillyR · 03/07/2010 15:36

This thread is becoming odd. The point is not that all feminists don't wear heels or that all feminists enjoy their periods. The point is that for the individual poster who made each remark, that is what feminism meant for her - it has given her the opportunity to do things differently from how she would have done them if she had not become a feminist. It is about her individual feelings.

It is not a criticism of people who are not feminists, or people who wear high heeled shoes.

happysmiley · 03/07/2010 15:50

To get back to the point

(15) A fantastic relationship with DH. I so glad that I was taught to think highly enough of myself to be able to turn down all the men that came before because they weren't up to scratch in their various ways. And now that I have DH, I'm glad that I have enough self respect to ensure my needs are provided for in our relationship as well as his.

(Disclaimer: It is noted that feminists and non-feminists alike can have positive personal relationships and these are not exclusively the domain of feminist women )

booyhoo · 03/07/2010 15:59

i dont feel like a fully qualified feminist yet, i feel like one in training (well i am lurking round here alot) but to me feminism means if you want to do something or not do something because of your own free choice and not because society or any man dictates. if i feel like wearing a short skirt with high heels and glitter on my eyelashes, i will, if i feel like getting on a scrambler and cutting tracks through a muddy field i will. teh two are not mutually exclusive (although i can forsee difficulty in wearing a short skirt and heels on a scrambler, but glitter would work ) as hobbies of a feminist.

Original poster
sethstarkaddersmum · 03/07/2010 16:53
  1. knowing you will never feel you need plastic surgery even if it could be done in your lunch hour and paid for in easy monthly instalments
OP posts:
wahwah · 03/07/2010 17:00

Self respect, self esteem and a sense of fairness. Being a role model for my children and an equal partner to my husband.

Feeling connected to other women throughout time and different places as well as in the present through shared understanding and values.

ElephantsAndMiasmas · 03/07/2010 17:40

Why would anyone want to write a list of why feminists (a group of women who don't know each other and don't necessarily agree on much) are better than "non-feminists" (a group of women who don't know each other and etc)? Why? Agree with those saying it's a thread to celebrate the differences that feminism has made to our lives.

For example I want to keep my name if I get married, for many reasons. If I wasn't a feminist and didn't know about feminism I would probably feel I had to, because of "tradition". Because I'm a feminist, I know I don't have to. What that's got to do with slagging off other women I don't know.